I'm missing the point I did before,
I'm sorry I'm always the one,
To make you feel that burn,
I feel so tired, tired
-Marianas Trench [Low-Fix Me]

I believe dinner was the most awkward thing I'd experienced, due to the fact that Mikey was incredibly angry at Gerard for lying, but I'd explain this all to Mikey in terms he'd understand. Gerard's situation wasn't easy, and it sure as hell wasn't a fun one. It would obviously be hard to share any of it with the last member of his family, especially if this member valued him more than anything else in the world. I guess I'd be pissed off too, but I mean, it can't be too bad can it? I'm not in this situation, I guess I have no say.
We ate in silence, and once we finished, Mikey got up and walked up to his new room after I told him he didn't need to help me clean up the mess of dishes and cutlery. Gerard stayed behind, and I told him the same thing, but he didn't listen. I guess it's something he didn't do, listen. Maybe he's better when it comes to other peoples problems. I would hope.
I picked up all the dishes, and scrapped off the excess food into the compost, and proceeded to place the dishes in the dish wash. Gerard placed the leftovers in Ziploc containers, and labeled them with the date, and put them in the fridge. That seemed useful, I should pick up on that habit. I went and cleared the table of all else and placed it back where it belonged, added detergent to the dish wash, and started a cycle.

"I'm going to talk to Mikey, okay?" I asked. I earned a small nod and ventured upstairs, and knocked on Mikey's door.

"Go the fuck away, will you?" I heard through the choked sob that escaped his lips.

"Mikes, it's Frank." I clarified, and opened the door. I found him lying on the floor, next to the bed, his eyes red from crying. I walk up to him, and kneel down next to him. "Mikey, look, I understand you're not okay, and that Gee- Gerard lied to you, but it was for the best. He never wanted to hurt you." I try but it's no use.

"Oh really? What's the lie going to do, protect me? I don't want his bullshit." At this point, he sits up against the bed frame and stares at me angrily.

"Hey, I'm not on his side, but I'm not on yours either. He lied to all of us and it's bullshit, but yeah, in a sense it's to protect you. Talk to him about it, and if he won't tell you, maybe he'll tell you at some point, but don't expect it to be any time soon. Mikey, you need to understand that he didn't venture back because he wanted to. He had to." With that I got up from my crouching position and left the room, shutting the door behind me. I heard him mutter a 'Yeah that's why he told you, a stranger.' before I left.
I ventured down to the living room, where a hopeful Gerard was found, all I could do was shake my head to let him know, and plop down next to him, exhausted. I turned on a movie, watching it with Gerard to get his mind off of the events that had occurred in the past twenty four hours.
Soon enough, it had been a month that Gerard and Mikey had been living with me. Most of their stuff was organized, and they were working through their problems. Sometimes I would come home from school and they'd be talking about nothing at all. I never even told them I'm in high school for this one last year. They'd certainly hate me for it, but I guess I could pass for a college guy or even university. I didn't know and didn't care. I just told them I have classes everyday of the week, and sometimes I dip on a certain day so they don't get weird about it.
Today I walked into the house and it was only Gerard. Mikey was nowhere to be found.

"Hey." I greeted him. A small smile was returned, but soon was wiped off his face by a frown.

"Did you not apply makeup to one eye, or did someone punch your face in?" He asked me with caution. I didn't mind, it's just that I'd forgotten that Tomas Berkley had punched me. I think he might have knocked me out. All I really remember is being in a locker. I guess I took too long to reply, because the next thing I knew, was Gerard was making his way towards my frail, disgusting self. I swallowed hard as he stopped only a few inches from my face. Maybe three if I was lucky.

"I got punched." I sighed out, my breath flickering and dancing on his lips. I could tell. I broke our eye contact and forced myself to look down at my feet. He made me nervous, and it's so stupid, but then again, maybe it was because he was a vampire. Yeah, that had to be it.

"Here, let me see." He placed his fingers under my chin, and lifted it upwards so I would look him in the eyes. I could feel the blood rise to my neck, and branch into my cheeks. His hazel orbs were locked onto mine, and they wouldn't let me look away. "It looks pretty bad." He noted duly. Well, no shit. What did he think? "But this doesn't." Before my mind could process anything at all, he brought his face forward, and placed his delicate, pale, chapped lips onto my troubled thin, pink ones, and moved one of his hands to my waist, and moved the other one up to my face. I could feel the callouses on his fingers, and it was pleasant. My heart rate sped up, and I couldn't control it. I slightly pressed my lips back against his, but as soon as I realized what had just happened, memories rushed back to me and I shoved Gerard off violently. I pushed passed him and muttered the words 'I can't' to myself over and over again. I locked myself in my own room, and I could feel my mood dropping. I could feel myself falling into the all time low that was my life a year or two ago. The more I thought of it, the more of a panic attack I began to have. My head felt as if it was set on fire, and my heart burned. I felt dizzy, and I couldn't take anything in. I was probably missing the point Gerard was making, but right now all I could deal with was nothing. I fell to the floor. I was too weak to reach anything, to get anything. I couldn't stand on my own to feet, and in that moment, I fell into unconsciousness.
I woke up to the sound of panicking from the two Way brothers. Mikey was placing the blame, and Gerard was defending himself, and trying to help me. I felt his hands try to slip under my body, but it was no use. I was dead weight. I tried to stir slightly, and that's when Gerard managed to pull my head into his lap. That much I knew. Just then, my eyes flickered open. At first I was blinded by the amounts of light that seeped into my eyes, that have been consumed by darkness for a good portion of the afternoon.

"He's up!" Gerard yelled to Mikey. "Oh god. Are you okay? I'm so sorry Frank." I tried to sit up but couldn't.

"I don't suggest you do that. You had a pretty big panic attack because of that fucker right there." I tilted my head to be able to see Gerard's face and smiled at him, trying as hard I could to make eye contact. A small, painful smile etched itself onto Gerard's face as he looked down at me. He was hurt by everything I had done to him. "I came home and Gerard was crying, and apparently he said you'd been ignoring him due to what mess he had created and I walked into your room with him, to find you on the floor. Thank fuck you didn't have a heart attack. Could have been a lot worse if you had. Could have been dead." Mikey went on. During my time with the two brothers, I've learned all their quirks, and honestly, I was perfectly fine with them. Every Friday they read comics and played Halo together, and we even began to invite Mikey's friend Ray. It got intense but it was all worth it in the end. "I'll leave you two alone." I nodded at Mikey, and watched him walk out. As soon as he did so, I turned over so that my face was buried in Gerard's shirt. I nuzzled it a little and made myself comfortable. I didn't want to lose him.

"Don't act like we're a couple , Frank." Gerard suddenly said. I heard his voice crack and I swear it was my death. My eyes began to well up in tears and I have never been more hurt, but I deserved it. I always do. "We're not, and we won't ever be unless you want to, which you seem to not want at all." I hear him scoff. "Who would want the ugly, vampire, freak, right?" I small sob escapes his lips, and that's when I begin to sob, shamelessly into his shirt. "Don't cry, Frank. I know it's not-" He stops as I let out a whimper and his shirt becomes damp. "Shit." He tried to get me to sit up, and then hugs me tightly. "Frank, just be honest with me. Don't fuck around with how I feel." I sat there a bit longer, just crying, and hugging this person who had rooted themselves into my heart, who I shamelessly call my best friend because over the past month and two days, he's been nothing but there for me when I break down, and I've been there at his and his brothers worst. "Frank, I know what it's like not to be loved and that's okay. Just tell me if you don't want a relationship with me okay? Stop hurting me. I know you're hitting an all time low here, but so am I. You're the best and worst thing that has happened to me, because you help me mend myself, but you break me down with all these false hopes and illusions, and I don't think my mind, or my heart can take anymore fantasies." He recites to me. "So please,"

"Gerard," I begin, but nothing comes out of my mouth.

"I see..." A small tear falls from the tip of his nose and on to my floor.

"Gee," I try again, and this time, the only thing stopping me from answering is the lump in my throat, because I know what will happen to us, to me, and to him, once I give him my answer.

Notes

How much do I suck? A lot probably. You guys will love and hate me. 5 more chapters. :s Tell me what you think.

xxxSoulless Vampirexxx