Well This Sure Ain't Funny

"So what are we going to do now... wait for the next victim again?" Gerard asked, gently nudging my forearm.

"That's probably the only thing we can do right now." I sighed, standing up from the sofa.

I kind-of hugged myself, damn this feels so shitty.

"This is fucked up man... like you're dead but still trapped to this hellhole because of a bitch who we have no clue finding. You must feel like shit." a small giggle escaped my mouth.

"Gerard you fucking mindreader." I breathed out, walking around the room.

After a small silence I stopped walking.

I was standing in the middle of the room with my empty head.

My empty feeling.

I didn't even notice what I was saying but when I noticed, it had already escaped my mouth.
"Man, this shit is worse than actually being dead, I bet."

"What do you mean?" Gerard pulled his head up and was staring right into my eyes, with his beautiful hazel eyes.

I ripped my eyes off of him and moved them to his bookshelf.

"Nothing." I answered with no emotion, which made me kind of frustrated.

"It's not nothing if you said it out loud." he said staring at me, and I could actually see his concern from the corner of my eye.

"I just... I'm trapped in place full of people who are 'happy' or 'angry' or 'in love' or something but I... -I feel nothing, I feel empty... I have never felt like this but I swear that this is worse than being sad, or... or angry or any kind of emotion. I have no emotions at all." now that I reversed all my none-feelings out, it made me kind of relieved. Now at least Gerard knew how I felt.

"I had some kind of emotions left when I had 'just died' but now I have nothing.

Death can hurt the living ones but the dead ones won't even feel pain.

This is worse than pain... just a white room with no corners... a fucking empty, white, round room and there's no door to just walk away."

After that there was a silence that felt like hours, just me huffing after my outburst.

"I can't say that I understand, because I don't... I can't say anything, and that hurts me right now." Gerard whispered keeping his eyes on the ground, and he looked like he was fighting back tears.

"Sorry to burst this shit out to you..." I said, trying to pull the best fake smile onto my face, walking next Gerard and hugging him tightly.


And that was it, we are never going to talk about that again.

Never.

Ever.

Notes

SORRY FOR BEING SUCH A SHITTY AUTHOR!!! I had a bad writing block and no time in my hands so there were no updates.

This chapter is kind of depressing, but I feel like Frank right now, so I decided to create something out of my anxiety and not just lie down and feel like shit :) ain't that nice to hear?