I stood up and caught Gerard’s gaze as I began walking back towards them. He started to get up, but I shook my head no. Once I got to the boys, I sat back down, crossing my legs and resting my arms on my knees.

“Guys, I am sorry. I…I just….”

Frank interrupted me, “Stop. You don’t need to apologize. We fucked up. We pushed too hard, too fast. This was our fault.”

I sigh, “Yeah, maybe, but I do need to apologize for how I reacted. I’m kind of a freak when it comes to people. I just – ah, I dunno.” I sat there staring off trying to figure out what to say as both Frank and Gerard waited patiently.

“I guess it breaks down to the fact I just don’t know how to be around other people. I don’t know how to talk to them or how to even be around them much. I don’t know how to be touched….I just…..” I drifted off and just shook my head. Even after years of therapy I still struggled to put my feelings into words.

Gee nodded his head, “I do get it, Evie. I really do.”

I raise my eyebrows skeptically, so he continued, “Evie, I spent 7 months in a state mental health hospital because I didn’t know how to be around other people without beating the shit out of them.” His head drooped even lower, his chin nearly resting on his chest. My breath caught in my throat at the sight.

Frank reached out and placed his hand on Gee’s shoulder giving him the courage to continue. “I didn’t know that touch could be a good thing….the only touch I knew was violent and full of pain. So when I got older, I gave as good as I got, ya know?” He looked so broken; defeated.

Frank looked at me “We all have our demons Evie.” The sadness in his voice stabbing my heart.

I am not sure what happened to me then. Maybe it was the simple fact that after nineteen years of feeling alone and disconnected from the world, my inner self was truly craving a bond with another living being. All I knew was that instead of wanting to run away, I found myself craving to be near the two beautiful creatures before me. I wanted to feel them, to know how their skin felt beneath my fingers. I wanted to know how they tasted, how they smelled.

The thoughts racing through my brain scared me, but the desire I felt overruled everything else.

Before my fear could stop me, I rose to my knees and began to move towards Gerard. His eyes went wide at first, but then he caught the meaning and heat in the look I was giving him and he quickly opened his arms inviting me in. I crawled onto his lap, straddling him, tentatively reaching up to lightly run my fingers down the side of his face. His lips parted slightly as he closed his eyes and gently leaned into my hand. His hands dropped to my thighs, pulling me closer until our hips met.

At the same time, I reached behind and pulled Frank towards me until he was pushed against my back. He put his arms around my waist and nestled his nose into the crook of my neck, breathing out with a slight sigh. His warm breath sent a shudder through my body and a sound that I didn’t know I was capable of making bubbled over my lips. I felt Frank’s body tense in response and he gently pressed his hips into my back. I could feel his hardening through my shirt and I pushed backwards against it. His groan, low and muffled against my back, drove me wild and my hips began to move in a steady rhythm against him.

My body was responding on its own and I followed it willingly.

As I rocked my hips, Gee’s breath hitched and he bucked upwards against me allowing me to feel his hardness straining against his already tight jeans. I put my hands on his chest and began walking my fingers downwards, stopping at his waist. His eyes snapped open and the pure desire that I felt pouring out was nearly my undoing. I leaned forward and let my lips skim over his briefly before I crushed my mouth against his. His tongue darted out automatically, teasing my lips.

I am sure we were quite the spectacle, the three of us; moaning and rubbing against each other on the dirty sidewalks of downtown Chicago, oblivious to those around us. It wasn’t until a homeless man across the street began whistling loudly that Frank snapped out of his haze and sighed.

“Ugh, guys, not that I want to break up our party, but I think we might need to take this elsewhere before someone calls the cops.” He unwrapped his arms from my waist and stood.

I felt Gee smile against my lips and he gently pulled himself away. He looked up at Frank rather coyly and shook his head. Frank smiled and reached down to offer me his hand. I accepted and stood up, turning slightly offering my hand to Gerard, helping him rise.

“Shit guys, I dunno what that was, but geez…..” I bite my lip and try to look sheepish. My mind is racing, scrambling to process what had just happened, but instead of the dread and anxiety I expect to feel creeping in, there is a warm, almost peaceful feeling spreading though me.

Gerard lets out a small groan, “Well, I dunno about you Frank, but it is going to be a minute before I can walk back into that meeting.”

I glanced down and realize both of them were still sporting rather impressive hard-ons. I small giggle creeps from my throat and I smash my lips together to stop it. Frank and Gee smirk at me, but both began to chuckle themselves.

Well, I thought to myself, now what?

Notes

Chapter 4 - Sorry it's been a few day...life happens ya know?

Honestly, this is my first attempt at writing anything physical so I am not sure how well it worked. Feedback would be great and appreciated.