Teenagers
Open Doors
The car ride to Gerard’s apartment is long and kind of dull. I can’t think about anything but seeing him again. I can’t help but think about leaving him again either. And how unbearable it will be. It breaks me. It tears me to shreds.
Frank is driving; oddly enough Gerard told him where he would be moving in and not me. I try not to take that personally, but it’s difficult. It seems like it was meant personally. It kind of feels like he hates me lately. He hasn’t called, written and it doesn’t seem like he wants a surprise visit from me either.
Un-touched nature sails by my cold window. I love the feeling of leaving everything behind, heading a place you’ve never been before. Especially when you get to do it with someone you love because then you have a safety net. Someone to fall back on if everything goes wrong. And someone who supports you.
Frank is half-smiling at the road, which, if I may add, sorely needs to be re-paved. His hazel eyes glisten with contentment. He seems happy. He seems at peace. But he also seems to be really looking forward to seeing an old friend again.
His hands tap the steering wheel to the rhythm of the crappy music on the radio. It’s some lame-ass song about sex and drugs and money. What else would it be about? It’s on the radio.
It annoys me that all you need to become famous these days is auto tune and to “know the right people”. It doesn’t come from the heart. It’s not passion. It’s bullshit. Degrading bullshit. Just plain shitty bullshit.
The car glides to a stop outside of a lonely gas station by the side of the road.
“I could sure go for a veggie-burger and like a coke.” Frank has recently decided to stop eating meat. This must be hard for him since he used to eat so much of it. I don’t eat it either when I’m around him to make it easier. He told me I didn’t have to stop just because of him, but I want to support him as much as he has supported me, and that’s the only way I know how.
“Do you want anything?” he wonders, climbing out of the car.
I don’t really get hungry on car rides, but he persuades me to go in with him and take a look. That boy’s trying to fatten me up, I swear.
The man behind the counter looks like a lumberjack of some sort. Shabby and not quite dressed to impress. There are stains on his plaid shirt of god knows what.
I tell him he doesn’t have to, but Frank buys me a veggie-burger and coke as well. In-case I get hungry, he says. Of course I can’t withstand the smell of it once I have it in my hands, so we end up taking a walk along the straight road ahead of us whilst eating, stretching our stiff legs after 3 hours of driving.
“So.. You looking forward to seeing him?” frank smiles, taking a monstrous bite of his burger.
Of course I am. Of course I miss him. It’s just weird. I don’t really know what I feel.
“Yeah...” I try to sound as truthful as possible. I mean, I’m not lying.
Frank doesn’t quite believe me. “He probably has a good reason for not calling you know. You didn’t call either.”
A fucking good reason!? He better have one.
Why must he bring that up? Gerard knows that I just assume that people don’t think I’m worth the bother when they don’t call. Frank can’t just come in here and pretend he knows everything.
Something inside of me snaps at the thought of Gee
“Shut the fuck up, Frank. You don’t know a thing about us.”
He lifts his hands in defense. “Hey I didn’t mean to hit a nerve there Mikes. Sorry.”
I know he’s right. I could’ve called, but I didn’t. “You know. Shit.. Yeah, sorry. I could’ve called.”
The conversation ends there. He doesn’t gloat or say: I told you so. He just puts his hand in my back pocket as we continue walking indecisively. I jump a bit. He laughs but knows that it doesn’t take much more for me to get a boner, so I try to focus on something else then his warm hand just two thin layers from my skin. Shit.
“Can you stop.”
He’s teasing me now. Stroking me and squeezing my ass.
“Someone’s pissed.” he jokes, grabbing my hand, and spinning me around. He then kisses me. Putting both his hands in my back pockets and pressing him-self up against my body. It’s not in a sexual way though, so I’m able to control myself.
He suddenly stops, looks me in the eyes, and says the most mood setting words possible.
“I gotta take a piss.” He throws my hand back and walks toward the nearby forest.
“Thanks!” I scream. “Thanks for the info. Can I come along?” I tease.
He just lifts his hand in a “my pleasure” fashion. “That’s messed up.” He exclaims, not bothering to turn around.
I just stand at the side of the foggy road, waiting for him to come back. It doesn’t take long.
We walk back to the car and continue our drive, several hours still ahead. I decide to close my eyes after a while of staring into the thick fog and getting bored with it. I usually never manage to fall asleep in cars no matter how tiered I am, but I guess I just feel so safe with Frank.
Anyways, time flies when you’ve drifted off, and I’m awoken as we pull into the parking-garage. It’s gotten dark out and the clock on the radio says it’s 11:30.
I am suddenly hit by a burst of energy and excitement. I haven’t seen Gerard in like two months. Oh, god! I can’t wait to hold him. To smell him. To hear his voice again. And not over the phone, because that’s not clear and doesn’t count. I can’t wait to show him how happy I am. With Frank.
Frank can’t stop smiling. “He has no idea we’re here.” he giggles. He’s always loved surprising people. Catching them off guard. That’s when you see people at their most honest state.
We get out of the car at the same time and Frankie locks up behind us, grabbing my hand and pulling me along towards the elevator.
The elevator can’t move any slower. My feet are tapping as we reach level 1, level 2, level 3 and so on. Finally we’re on level 9; we step out into the long carpeted hallway.
Frank walks in front of me, guiding me towards the right flat. I can tell how exited he is by how fast he’s walking. He’s practically running.
As we reach the right door both my hands and knees are trembling. I just want to hug him. Fling my arms around him and take him in. Like the good old days. But something is off. I don’t know what. The smell maybe? It’s familiar, but what is it? It’s not strong.
Frank rings the doorbell. It’s so quiet. Nothing. He’s not answering. “Maybe he’s not home.”
Frank tries turning the knob. It’s open.
Frank is driving; oddly enough Gerard told him where he would be moving in and not me. I try not to take that personally, but it’s difficult. It seems like it was meant personally. It kind of feels like he hates me lately. He hasn’t called, written and it doesn’t seem like he wants a surprise visit from me either.
Un-touched nature sails by my cold window. I love the feeling of leaving everything behind, heading a place you’ve never been before. Especially when you get to do it with someone you love because then you have a safety net. Someone to fall back on if everything goes wrong. And someone who supports you.
Frank is half-smiling at the road, which, if I may add, sorely needs to be re-paved. His hazel eyes glisten with contentment. He seems happy. He seems at peace. But he also seems to be really looking forward to seeing an old friend again.
His hands tap the steering wheel to the rhythm of the crappy music on the radio. It’s some lame-ass song about sex and drugs and money. What else would it be about? It’s on the radio.
It annoys me that all you need to become famous these days is auto tune and to “know the right people”. It doesn’t come from the heart. It’s not passion. It’s bullshit. Degrading bullshit. Just plain shitty bullshit.
The car glides to a stop outside of a lonely gas station by the side of the road.
“I could sure go for a veggie-burger and like a coke.” Frank has recently decided to stop eating meat. This must be hard for him since he used to eat so much of it. I don’t eat it either when I’m around him to make it easier. He told me I didn’t have to stop just because of him, but I want to support him as much as he has supported me, and that’s the only way I know how.
“Do you want anything?” he wonders, climbing out of the car.
I don’t really get hungry on car rides, but he persuades me to go in with him and take a look. That boy’s trying to fatten me up, I swear.
The man behind the counter looks like a lumberjack of some sort. Shabby and not quite dressed to impress. There are stains on his plaid shirt of god knows what.
I tell him he doesn’t have to, but Frank buys me a veggie-burger and coke as well. In-case I get hungry, he says. Of course I can’t withstand the smell of it once I have it in my hands, so we end up taking a walk along the straight road ahead of us whilst eating, stretching our stiff legs after 3 hours of driving.
“So.. You looking forward to seeing him?” frank smiles, taking a monstrous bite of his burger.
Of course I am. Of course I miss him. It’s just weird. I don’t really know what I feel.
“Yeah...” I try to sound as truthful as possible. I mean, I’m not lying.
Frank doesn’t quite believe me. “He probably has a good reason for not calling you know. You didn’t call either.”
A fucking good reason!? He better have one.
Why must he bring that up? Gerard knows that I just assume that people don’t think I’m worth the bother when they don’t call. Frank can’t just come in here and pretend he knows everything.
Something inside of me snaps at the thought of Gee
“Shut the fuck up, Frank. You don’t know a thing about us.”
He lifts his hands in defense. “Hey I didn’t mean to hit a nerve there Mikes. Sorry.”
I know he’s right. I could’ve called, but I didn’t. “You know. Shit.. Yeah, sorry. I could’ve called.”
The conversation ends there. He doesn’t gloat or say: I told you so. He just puts his hand in my back pocket as we continue walking indecisively. I jump a bit. He laughs but knows that it doesn’t take much more for me to get a boner, so I try to focus on something else then his warm hand just two thin layers from my skin. Shit.
“Can you stop.”
He’s teasing me now. Stroking me and squeezing my ass.
“Someone’s pissed.” he jokes, grabbing my hand, and spinning me around. He then kisses me. Putting both his hands in my back pockets and pressing him-self up against my body. It’s not in a sexual way though, so I’m able to control myself.
He suddenly stops, looks me in the eyes, and says the most mood setting words possible.
“I gotta take a piss.” He throws my hand back and walks toward the nearby forest.
“Thanks!” I scream. “Thanks for the info. Can I come along?” I tease.
He just lifts his hand in a “my pleasure” fashion. “That’s messed up.” He exclaims, not bothering to turn around.
I just stand at the side of the foggy road, waiting for him to come back. It doesn’t take long.
We walk back to the car and continue our drive, several hours still ahead. I decide to close my eyes after a while of staring into the thick fog and getting bored with it. I usually never manage to fall asleep in cars no matter how tiered I am, but I guess I just feel so safe with Frank.
Anyways, time flies when you’ve drifted off, and I’m awoken as we pull into the parking-garage. It’s gotten dark out and the clock on the radio says it’s 11:30.
I am suddenly hit by a burst of energy and excitement. I haven’t seen Gerard in like two months. Oh, god! I can’t wait to hold him. To smell him. To hear his voice again. And not over the phone, because that’s not clear and doesn’t count. I can’t wait to show him how happy I am. With Frank.
Frank can’t stop smiling. “He has no idea we’re here.” he giggles. He’s always loved surprising people. Catching them off guard. That’s when you see people at their most honest state.
We get out of the car at the same time and Frankie locks up behind us, grabbing my hand and pulling me along towards the elevator.
The elevator can’t move any slower. My feet are tapping as we reach level 1, level 2, level 3 and so on. Finally we’re on level 9; we step out into the long carpeted hallway.
Frank walks in front of me, guiding me towards the right flat. I can tell how exited he is by how fast he’s walking. He’s practically running.
As we reach the right door both my hands and knees are trembling. I just want to hug him. Fling my arms around him and take him in. Like the good old days. But something is off. I don’t know what. The smell maybe? It’s familiar, but what is it? It’s not strong.
Frank rings the doorbell. It’s so quiet. Nothing. He’s not answering. “Maybe he’s not home.”
Frank tries turning the knob. It’s open.
11/2/13