I Still Think You're Beautiful

After Pete leaves I stand there for a moment, completely confused as to why he would even say that to me. I mean, he's an idiot and I've never seen him like that. In the ten years I've known him he's never ever been dead serious like that, the only time he ever actually was that serious Was when he first met Mikey. And that was a long time ago. I shake off what he said and turn the tv on, curling up with a blanket around my body while Adventure Time plays quietly on the screen. I'm almost drifting off to sleep until a voice makes my eyes shoot open. "Zacky I'm a grown fucking person, I can make my own decisions you asshole...!" I sit up and push my hair back, listening to Franks obvious voice getting louder and louder as he continues to talk. "Well guess the fuck what? Maybe I did fuck him!" Frank yells, his voice strained, "You don't fucking own me you bastard...You know what? Stop fucking calling- oh wait so now I'm the bitch? Says the shit face who tried to rape me-" Franks voice finally reaches the top of the stairs, I stand up and trudge over to his shirtless body. His phone is still pressed against his ear as his eyes become glassy with threatening tears. Frank looks up with me and I can hear the voice screaming on the other end, telling him to go kill himself and jump off a building. I stare at Frank wide-eyed and he just shrugs, letting out a sigh as he casually pulls the phone away from his ear and hangs up on the person who is still screaming. The phone drops out of his hand and he gives me one look and I know what he needs, pulling him into my arms, I feel him begin to cry as his arms wrap around my waist. "I...I don't...I don't know what I did" "Sh you didn't do you anything." I whisper and rub up and down his back with my fingertips. "You're okay now, it's all okay. You're gonna be just fine my love..." I lean down and lift Franks legs so they're wrapped around my waist and his head is laid against my shoulder, he lets out a comfortable sigh and I take him back into the basement, laying him down on the bed. I lay myself next to him as he just stares at the ceiling, not saying a word and keeping a space between the two of us. Sighing for about the 10th time in 20 minutes, I turn over, my back facing Frank as I realize he probably doesn't wanna be bothered with me right now. "Gerard..." He finally says after almost 15 minutes of silence. "Yeah?" I slur and turn back over to face him, "Are you okay?" "I just...I love you..." He whispers. I let out a short breathe and wrap my arms around Frank, pulling him closer to me. "We're okay...right?" "Of course we are" I answer and and kiss his forehead, "we'll always be okay. we're completely fine. I promise." "Please....please don't leave me" Frank mumbles into my chest, his hands clinging to my shirt. "I just....I can't loose you too. I'm just...I'm nothing without you..." "Baby, I wouldn't leave you if my life depended on it. You're stuck with me, okay? Nothing, I mean nothing, could ever make me leave you. " "Thank you Gee" Frank whispers before falling asleep. I watch him sleep for a little, noticing how peaceful and beautiful he looks. I wish he could always look like this, care free and relaxed without a hint of stress or sadness upon his face. I slowly release myself from Franks grip, kissing him on the forehead before throwing a blanket over him softly and running up the stairs. I walk into the kitchen slowly, almost jumping a little when I see someone standing by the counter. "Oh hey mom" I sigh realizing its only my mother. She turns around slowly from what she's doing and my heart breaks as I see her face. Mascara is running down her face from crying and her hair is a mess. "Hi sweetheart" she sniffs, forcing a smile. "Oh my god, are you okay?" I ask taking a step closer to my mother, "What...what happened?" "Gerard sweetie nothing happened" She clearly lied. "Now, there's a boy outside waiting to talk to you, he says it's important." I stare at her, slightly confused. Who would want to talk to me? "Do you know who it is?" Mom shakes her head, "But...before you go talk to him," She places her hands on both of my shoulders, "No matter what happens, just know that your father and I love you and Mikey very much, okay? And no matter what happens, none of it is your fault and we still love you." "Uh....what are you saying?" I ask, getting a little scared. "Honey," Mom sighs, "Your father wants a divorce." "Oh." Is all I can manage to say. "I....I don't know what to say....I'm sorry..." Mom takes her hands off me and reaches up to push my hair out of my face, "You don't need to say anything, now, go talk to that weird kid outside. We'll talk later, alright?" "Ok ma" I sigh, pulling her into a tight hug, "I love you mom." "I love you too Gee." She replies. "Now get lost." She teases and pushes me off her. I smile and run a hand through my hair, leaving my mom and heading for the front door. Holding my breathe, I slowly open the door and take a step out, my eyes searching around the porch until they finally land on someone with ridiculous hair sitting on the porch swing. "Hail Satan what did I do to deserve this," I mumble and slam the front door. Leaning my back against the door, the intruder finally looks up from his phone and notices me. "Oh hey GeeGee." "Dahvie, why the hell are you here?!" I sigh and rub my forehead, "You don't even scare me anymore, you're just really annoying and relentless." Dahvie stands up and lifts his fat ass off my porch swing, "I'm here on occasion of what Pete said to you earlier." "Oh god what now?" I breathe and I am almost tempted to just throw my hands up in the air and fall to my knees in annoyance. "Cause listen, you're not scaring me-" "Does this scare you Gerard?" Dahvie interrupts. He reaches into his pockets and pulls out something tiny, I then realize he had a fucking pocket knife in his hand. "Because I swear to god if I could fucking stab you right now I would." "Dahvie," I almost laugh, "You're like, 3 feet tall, I mean, you make Frank look tall. I'm not fucking scared of you, or Pete. And Jared-" "Don't even say his name you fucking sicko" Dahvie spits while pointing the pocket knife at me, I just stare at it with my arms crossed, playing it off as if I don't care. But on the inside, I'm kinda scared. "So I'm the sicko?" I laugh. But it's not a happy laugh, it's the 'youre-reminding-me-of-the-past-so-I'll-just-laugh-to-keep-from-crying kind of laugh. "Because last time I checked, Jared killed himself, It's not like I went to his house and slit his fucking wrists for him!" "Maybe if you weren't such a slut, he'd still be here." Dahvie spat, "But you know Gerard Way, always has to take advantage of the ones younger then him, then take their virginity for 5 bucks and a blowjob from a fucking hobo." I push myself off the wall and look down at Dahvie, by this point I'm furious and ready to fucking punch him. "Where the hell did get the idea that I took frank's virginity for money? Huh? I mean, I'm pretty low and fucked up, but I wouldn't do something as shitty as that" "You're so fucking pathetic, you know that?" Dahvie sighs and shoves the knife back into his pocket. "You really need to get a fucking grip." "On what?!?" I yell, "You're the one that needs to fucking get ahold of yourself! Like what the fuck are you doing?!? Who the hell shows up to someones front porch with a fucking pocket knife?!" Dahvie shrugs and looks down, "And I'm not even the biggest threat to you" He says softly and pushes his big mess of hair out of his eyes. "But, I guess since school ends this week it'll all blow over and...actually no it won't." "And why won't it?" I groan. "Because Mason." Dahvie says bluntly, "I mean you guys haven't talked in god knows how long but...he still notices. And then his cousin Zacky or whatever-" "Wait wait wait what?" I remember the name Zacky from somewhere, " Masons cousin is who?" "His name is Zacky and that's really all I know okay?" He spits, "You're wasting my time you fucking piece of shit. I'd rather spend time with your faggot boyfriend then with you." "You're lucky I'm too stressed and tired to fight you right now." "Yeah okay bye you chicken dick." Dahvie answers and shakes his head. He shoves his hands in his pockets and glares at me before stepping off the porch and walking down the path and away from my house.

Notes

1. Sorry for my absence and the wait for this even though nobody even reads this anymore. I had a recent suicide attempt and almost succeeded but let's not go into that,
2. I'll edit this later because I'm a lazy fucking bitch
3. I love you. ♥️