I Still Think You're Beautiful

I put my phone down slowly and take in a deep breathe. Bothe my hands grip the edge of the counter as I inhale and exhale to try and keep from having a panic attack. I pick my phone back up and freeze for a second, thinking of what I can say to Jared, I sigh loudly and shake my head. My phone drops from hand back onto the counter as I decide to not say anything, mostly because that'll only make things worse. I stand there and think for a second. What the fuck is Jared even going to do? It's not like he would kill Frank, he's not capable of hurting anyone. Hell, Jared even avoids stepping on ants. But he's good at revenge, and fucking around with people's emotions. After a few minute of thinking and drinking some coffee that I made, I go back to the basement. The room is dark except for a ray of moonlight coming in from the tiny window next to the bed. I can faintly see Franks tiny sleeping body, his back rising and falling as he breathes slowly. I tear off my shirt and don't bother with my skinny jeans because I'm too lazy to take them off, I then climb into bed next to Frank and move my face next to his. I stare at him and think, what if I ever did loose him? What if this beautiful person ever died...the earth wouldn't know what it was loosing. Nobody would understand what kind of person would be gone, just because Frank Iero is something special. He's one of those people that are too amazing for words. He's one of those people that if the world ever lost him, everyone would be devastated.

I have to protect him, no matter what.

I lean closer to his face and kiss his lips as softly as I can while my arms wrap around his waist, bringing him closer to me. He stirs for a second and his arms slide around my neck and he buries his face in my chest. I rest my chin lightly on his head and rub his back, listening to his breathing. "I love you Gerard." I hear him whisper so quietly that I can barely hear him. I hold him closer to me smile, "I love you too Frank."

⚪⚫⚪

I wake up in the middle of the night with Frank still in my embrace. I listen around for what woke me up and I hear alot of banging and yelling coming from upstairs. I kiss Franks nose gently and slowly remove my arms from under his weightless body, I sit up slowly and jump off the bed. I tug on a random shirt and race up the stairs. I get to the top and the yelling becomes louder. The house is dark except for a dull light coming from the kitchen, I squint my eyes and rub my pounding head as I make my way toward. I push open the door to the kitchen and find my dad and Mikey inside. My fathers face looks flushed with anger, his back leaned up against the counter as he glares down at the floor. Mikey is on the ground on his knees, tears streaming down his face. My dad looks up and notices me, "Gerard," He growls, "Go to bed, this doesn't concern you."
Mikey jumps up and points to me, his eyes widening, "This does too concern him!"
My dad leans toward Mikey and throws his arms up, "I don't need two fucking fags in my house! One is bad enough! We have enough problems in this house, you don't need to create another one!" He screams.
Mikey backs away as I watch in disbelief. Mikey begins to cry harder, hiccuping sobs escaping his lips, "This isn't fair! I love Ray, I need him! Why do you love Gerard so much more than me? You let him do whatever he wants, at least I'm actually sane! You and mom don't even pay any fucking attention to me, it's all about Gerard Gerard Gerard! Well guess what, maybe I wanna fucking die too! Maybe I want a boyfriend too! Maybe I fucking slit my wrists! And does anybody give a shit? No! Youre too worried about perfect little Gerard-"
"Mikey," My dad interrupts.
"No!" Mikey shouts back, "Youre going to fucking listen to me for once!"
"Michael James Way!" My father screams back. Thats when his hand meets Mikey's cheek, making a loud snapping sound echo off the walls. I stand there, my mouth wide open as I stare in disbelief. Mikey grabs his cheek and falls back onto his knees in front of my dad.
My father just fucking slapped my baby brother....
"WHAT THE FUCK!" I scream. "WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU? YOU PROMISED YOU'D NEVER DO THAT TO ANY OF US YOU FUCKING LIAR!"
"Oh fuck off Gerard!" Dad spits, "Go to bed."
"God I hate you!" I scream. And I really do mean it. I look down at Mikey as he sobs. My cheeks wet with tears as I run out of the kitchen and slam the door behind me. I scramble back down to the basement half blinded by my tears, I collapse onto the bed next to Frank who is now awake and staring at me. "Gee, are you okay?" He whispers. I wrap my arms around him and kiss his soft lips, "Yeah baby, I'm okay." I answer and wipe the tears from my cheeks, forcing a smile at him,
"Don't worry about me angel." I hold him tightly and snuggle our bodies under the covers, "Just sleep my love." Frank nods and closes his eyes, falling asleep instantly.
But I don't, I'm wide awake, worrying about Mikey. And thinking about what Jared is going to do.

Notes

imma update two more times tonight. yay.