The Ghost of You

Gerard's POV
I dated Justin for 3 month now and it was great. We said “I love you” and made out and cuddled and I felt like he was the one for me.
I could not be happier. The only thing that brought me down was my Guardian. He was gone and I missed him.
He was my best friend and I could tell him everything. When I cried he hugged me until I stopped and he understood me. I really wanted him to come back but I had Justin. I should be happy, right?
One day me and Justin were laying in his bed and watching Game of Thrones.
Well, we didn't really watched it. We just made out. We were both in our boxer shorts.
I kissed his neck and he let out a moan.
“I want you, Baby, please.” He mumbled under my lips when I kissed him again.
We had this conversation many times. I knew what he wanted and I knew that I was not ready.
It was kinda silly but I wanted to be sure that he is the right one for my first time. I wanted it to be perfect.
“You know that I'm not ready..”
“Ugh, you are never ready. How much time do you fucking need?” He was angry.
He was often angry lately and I did not like it.
We continued making out but the passion was gone. So I turned to the tv and enjoyed my favourite series.
Justin groaned and closed his eyes. After a few minutes he was asleep.
I sighed this relationship started to become painful.
Every time I said “I love you” he just said “I know”.
Some times I questioned if he still loved me.
The day after that we went to a party. He had obviously a lot of fun. I just kinda sat there with my beer in my hand. I didn't knew the people and I felt lonely so I decided to search for Justin.
I found him making out with a girl. His hands on her butt. Her hands in his hair. I gasped for air.
Justin looked up. His eyes widened and he let go of the girl and walked towards me.
Well he was too drunk to really walk. He almost fell twice on this short distance. I stood there with tears in my eyes and I felt terrible.
I was right.. He did not love me. I ran away. I couldn't even think straight. What did I thought? Nobody could ever love me. He was the proof.
It rained outside and my clothes were completely soaked through. I was freezing and shook. It was kinda a miracle that I reached the hotel I used to live in before the sun rose.
I fell into my bed and began to sob into my pillow. I felt someone covering me and wrapping his arms around me. He started to sing Crash by You me at Six.
I knew it was my Guardian and I started to calm down. After a few minutes I fell asleep.
He was still singing when I woke up. There was breakfast next to the bed a few flowers.
“I missed you” I whispered.
“I missed you too Gee ♥,
What happened?” he wrote.
I told him everything while sobbing into his chest. It was weird cause I could not see him but I felt more comfortable than ever.

Notes