Falling For You

Blaze POV

The alarm clock wakes me up. Fuck you, too! I sighed and rub my eyes.

Bad idea.

You see, I didn't slept until four in the morning because my thoughts on what happen that day. Practically, I only had about two hours of sleep.

My eyes started to burn and water up.

"Oh fuck," I said quietly.

After blinking a few times then head to the bathroom. I sigh and slash water on my face.

It's only Wednesday! Fuck me, this is a bad week. I thought to myself. This week is going slow as fuck!

I dried my face off and brushed my teeth. I really hated seeing myself in the mirror. I sighed and got my uniform.

I looked at the skirt's size to make sure it's mine and not Jennifer's. I sighed, it was Jenn's. The rest of my clothes are mine. I quickly put on the shorts I always wear under my skirt and go to Jenn's room.

I knock and Jennifer tells me to come in.

"Jennifer, I believe this is your skirt," I said. Mom always confused Jennifer's and I's clothes.

"And I believe I have yours," Jennifer said and we both threw our skirts at each other simultaneously.

I walk to my room and Carlos opens his bedroom door.

"Hey, emo!" Carlos said.

"Fuck off!" I said and closed my door.

I put on my skirt and fixed my hair. Well, I brushed my hair. I don't do it at all.

I sigh and stay in my room until it's time to go. Since I don't eat at all, I look through my messages.

The last person I text was Gerard. I wonder how he was doing?

'Hey Gee. How's your hangover? Are you alright?'

I wait a couple of minutes and I hear a beep from my phone. It was Gee.

'I'm fine. I don't remember yesterday though. It's kind of a blur. What the fuck happen?'

I reply back.

'You were drunk, Gerard. Why the fuck were you drunk? Where the fuck did you get beer from? You're a fucking minor!'

I sigh and look at the time. Time to go. I quickly grab my book bag and run out of my house. I didn't want to face my parents and siblings.

I hear a beep from my phone again.

'I'm sorry okay. I don't know why I drank. I'm sorry.'

I sigh.

'Fine. I'm going by your house so get fucking ready you diva!'

I walk up to the Ways house and see Gerard come out.

"What! Mikey not coming?" I shout.

"He got sick! High fever!" Gerard shouted back.

"Hope he feels alright," I stated.

I can feel an awkward silence as we walk to school. We both went to our lockers. I just hope I wouldn't run into the Hot A's.

As I closed my locker and looked at my books, guess who the fuck I run into. Yep, the Hot A's. Fuck.

"Watch where you're going, bitch!" Adriana hissed.

"Oh my bad your highness," I said sarcastically.

"Shut the fuck up emo!" Ashley barked.

"Better than being call a whore, whore," I said and left the Hot A's with their mouths open.

As I walk, I turn around.

"Oh, by the way, quit rolling your skirts up!" I yelled and walk to my first class.

I went to my locker and put my morning books in and headed to the lunch room. Today we have chicken patties. Great.

I sighed and sat down in the table I normally sit with Gee. I looked at my food. It's taunting me to eat it.

Maybe I should eat.

No! Don't eat it, Blaze. You'll get fat. Wait, you're fat already!

Stop talking stupid conceits.

Nope.

"Hey Blaze!" Gerard said as he sat down.

"Hey Gerard," I said.

"What's wrong?" Gerard asked.

"Nothing. I'm fine. Why'd you ask?" I asked.

"You seem worried." Gerard said and took a bite of his food.

"Hey, baby," Hayley said as she sat down next to me.

"Hey, babe," I said and looked for Miranda.

"Where's Miranda?" I asked Hayley.

"She's getting her food." Hayley stated

"Okay." I said.

Once Miranda came, we all started talking about superheros, bands, shows, and more bands. Lunch was slower than usual.

I dumped my food to the trash and went quickly to my locker and got my stuff for study hall. Gerard and I had the same period for study hall, so I usually help him with science there.

"Blaze," Gerard whisper. That snapped me back to reality.

"What?" I mumble.

"Why have you been so distracted lately? You still haven't taught me section four yet," Gerard quaked.

"S-sorry. I don't know what has been through me lately," I said and open to chapter 5, section four.

"You also haven't eaten your lunch. Last time I saw you eat was Monday after school. What's been going on, Blaze?" Gerard asked.

"I just haven't been hungry lately," I said. Like as if on cue, my stomach rumbles. But just loudly enough for Gerard and I to hear. Fuck.

"Not hungry, eh?"

"Shut up, Gee. I can't eat alright?" I whisper-shout.

"Why can't you?" Gerard said.

"Let's just get back to the lesson, alright," I whisper and point to the book. Thank goodness I have on my blazer.

"Your arm," Gerard said grabbing my wrist making me wince.

"Ow, fuck!" I whisper-shout.

"Blaze," Gerard whisper and pulled up my sleeve. "Why Blaze?"

"Like you care. Lets just get back to the lesson," I said. Study hall was for an hour and so far, we've been here for five minutes.

"We'll get to that later. Tell me why you cut yourself?" Gerard whisper.

"You wouldn't understand Gerard." I mumble. "What about you? Why were you drunk yesterday?" I whisper to him.

He was silent.

"That's what I thought," I said.

"I was just upset," he said.

"Upset about what?" I asked.

"I can't tell you why. I'm sorry," Gerard said.

"Why can't you tell me?" I asked.

"I-I just can't, okay?"

"Fine."

We went to the lesson. Gerard had to do four questions and I had to check them. While I waited for Gerard's answers, I started to over hear other people conversations since they weren't quiet like Gerard and I's conversation.

"OMG Maddie, he asked you out?" Said a brunette haired girl.

"Now Vanessa, he asked me out to prom!" Maddie said and they both squealed.

"Who isn't going to prom?" I heard Vanessa ask Maddie.

"Well, I'm not sure. I think some of the Gothic aren't. Yeah. I don't think the Gothics are going since the jocks and those stupid girls are coming." Maddie said.

Unlike most people in this school, Maddie calls us Gothic, not 'emo'. It's better than a made up word like 'emo'.

"Oh. Why don't you call them emo?" Vanessa asked.

"Because 'emo' isn't a real word. So therefore, Gothic is what I call them. Jocks and bitches call them 'emo' since they're stupid." Maddie reply.

"Who's stupid?" Vanessa asked.

"The jocks and bitches," Maddie said.

Well, at least Maddie is nicer to us than the jock and whores.

"Finish," Gerard said and he handed me his composition book.

I looked at his answers. He was getting better at science everyday. I'm a good teacher, maybe I should consider teaching. Nah!

"Your answers are good. On number two, you forgot to explain why," I said and handed back Gee's composition book.

Gerard went back to number two.

Prom. I wasn't going to prom. Not even if Hayley asked me out. I don't really want to wast so much money for one stupid night.

Well, it's not like I really like Hayley. I don't like her the way she like me. Maybe I should tell her that, she seemed like a reasonable person.

"Ms. Loya and Mr. Way, we're going to talk after class." Mr. Parker reported to us.

Most of my mind was at my scars. I know they'll never fade away. I couldn't touch my upper thighs since I cut myself there. If I did, they just hurt like a bitch.

After class was over, Gerard and I stayed in the room.

"Ms. Loya, you've done a remarkable job on tutoring Mr. Way. He has shown more progress, I'm proud of both you and Mr. Way." Mr. Parker rejoiced.

"Thanks," we both reply.

"Keep up the hard work Mr. Way, and Ms. Loya, keep doing a remarkable job on teaching him. You may both go now." Mr. Parker said with a smile.

We both went to our lockers and went home.

I went to Hayley's house quickly before Gerard came to my home. I knock on the door and Hayley opens it.

"I didn't know you were coming," Hayley said kissing me check.

"I need to talk to you, Hayley," I said.

"What's wrong?" Hayley asked.

"Hayley. It's hard to say this. You're a great girl and anyone who has who as a girlfriend is one lucky person, but, I don't think it's going to work out between us. I'm sorry Hayley," I said.

"You're breaking up with me?" Hayley muttered.

"Yes. Can we be friends instead? I see you more of a friend than a girlfriend." I said.

"Yeah. I can be your friend. I'm sorry I push you to being in a relationship with me." Hayley said.

"It's fine, you didn't know," I said.

"You like someone, don't you?" Hayley said with a smirk.

"What!" I said.

"You love Gerard!" Hayley said jumping up and down.

"How'd you know!?" I asked.

"I've seen the way you look at him," Hayley said.

"Damn, is it that noticeable?" I asked.

"Took me a while. You never looked at me the way you looked at Gerard. And by 'took me a while', I mean today at lunch. I heard rumors on how you guys like each other but too afraid to tell one another." Hayley said.

"There's rumors about us being together!?" I asked.

"Yeah. Some of the girls think it's romantic. Some of the guys think Gerard should make the move now." Hayley said.

"Oh God, it's so noticeable." I said.

"Go make the move, Blaze!" Hayley said.

"Thank you Hayley. You're the best. Any person is luck to have you!" I said, hugged her and left to my house.

"Good luck!" Hayley said.