"Since you first started at our school..."He mumbled. I stared at him in disbelief. For over a month he had kept from me that my fucking mum was the school fucking nurse. I know I probably had no right to be angry with him but fucking hell was I angry.

"Frank please understand this. I had no right to tell you it was Linda's job not mine!"He yelled. He was right. But a fucking month?
"Gerard you don't keep that sort of shit from someone! Yeah maybe once we had started talking you introduced me to her, try to get Linda to fucking tell me. But when that doesnt work after over a week YOU FUCKING TELL ME!"I screamed right at the wrong time. A band had just finished their set and the place was pretty quiet. Everyone was looking at us. Fuck.

"Nothing to see here."I informed them all, giving everyone an evil glare until they turned away.
"Frank I'm sorry."Gerard said quietly as he led me into the bathroom properly,"I should have told you sooner instead of had you figure it out on your own. It's not fair on you. At all."

I sighed and leaned against a wall and closed my eyes. It was only fucking tuesday and I was already sick of the week.
"Frank please forgive me..."Gerard whispered. He said it with such need and- fucking love. I opened my eyes and look at him. He has tears in his eyes. It killed me to see him like that but I couldn't find the emotional strength or kindness under the anger to forgive him.

"No."I breathed out after what felt like an eternity of silence.
"What?"Gerard croaked.
"No... Not yet at least. Gerard you have to understand. You grew up with your Mum. You knew her. You know whats happened to her. You've known that your whole life. I havent. My only memory of my Mum is when she was beaten by my Dad and then she gave me to the mace. You will never fully understand what it feels like to find out that suddenly your mum is fine and is working at your new school. I need time okay? I feel- like my head is going to fucking explode! I mean, how do I know you didnt just get close to me for Linda huh? What if all of this was just a big fucking fake?!"I swiped away the unexpected tears furiously.

Gerard stared at me uncertainly which made me worry that it really was just a way to get me close to Linda. I gave him one look before walking out of the bathroom, letting the tears fall freely.
"Frank wait please."Gerard said behind me but I ignored him. I ignored the guys too as I walked past their table. I ignored everybody as I left.

"You okay?"Steven asked me as I got in the car. I nodded and stared out the window, not saying a word. Steven seemed to realise I wasn't going to say anything so he started the car and drove back to the house.

-time lapse-

"Frank you need to go back to school at some point."Lily grumbled as she got ready. I rolled over in my bed and stared at a different wall. It had been three days since I had been to school. Three days since I had spoken more than three words to anybody in one sentence.

After I had left The Magic Bean I had pretty much turned into Gerard. I wasnt eating properly and spent most of my days either in bed or walking around. I now knew the layout of this neighbourhood. But I had stayed away from school and the coffee shop. Gerard had tried talking to me for two days but now I think he realised I wasn't talking to anybody. Lily was pissed off at me for not talking to her about anything and for getting like this but I had no idea what to fucking do.

Every second I spent in bed, every moment I spent out walking I was contemplating what to do. Whether I should talk to Linda, talk to Gerard or talk to Lily. I knew I had to do something soon because this was getting ridiculous and I was starting to get fucking hungry.

I heard Lily sigh and leave me alone again. Yesterday Claire had been taken back to the mace house so I didn't even have to keep her entertained. I really needed to go see her but it was probably better for her being there for someone to take care of her properly. Lily and I were the only ones that did that here. Steven fed her of course but he never really paid attention to her.

"Frank?"Someone said behind me. I didn't turn around. Didn't know or care who it was. They say down on my bed and placed their hand on my shoulder. I closed my eyes, pretending to be asleep as they rested their head on my arm with a sigh.

"I'm sorry..."They sighed again. I couldn't figure out for the life of me who the hell it was. It was tempting to look over my shoulder and find out but I didn't want to talk right now. They were staying there forever.

Curiosity got the better of me as usual and I turned to see who it was.
"Mikey?"I croaked. My voice felt like someone was scraping the back of my throat with a rusty nail from lack of use.

"Hey buddy. Did I wake you?"He asked me softly.
"Nah I was um already awake... What are you doing here?"I struggled to maneuver myself around to face hi properly.
"To get you to eat."He chuckled, sounding fake and worried. I spose I should eat.

"Alright."I groaned as I started getting up.
"Wow really? They said it would be a lot harder than that."Mikey looked at me, shocked to the bone.
"Who's they?"I asked slowly. If Mikey was here that most likely meant Gerard was here and if Gerard was down there I wasn't going down.

"Just Lily, Steven and Sarah,"Mikey looked away from me and at his phone,"Come on, Lily said she has to leave soon and that she wants to see you out of bed if you are coming down."Mikey started walking towards the door.

I looked at him skeptically as I moved around the bed. Something about the way he had said that made me extremely suspicious about who was actually downstairs. I was about to say something when my stomach grumbled loudly and made Mikey smirk.

"Lets go."I smiled and joined him in the walk downstairs. When we reached the bottom Mikey grabbed my arm and started tugging me.
"Dude I can walk by myself."I grumbled, trying to shake him off. He was surprisingly strong for such a skinny guy.

"Yeah but you might start going in a different direction."
"Why would I do that?"I asked him as we walking into the dining room. I looked around at the table. There were still a few other kids that hadn't left for school, all decked out in their uniform. Then there was Lily sitting next to Steven and Taylor looking shocked and nervous as fuck.

Mikey went and sat down next to one of the school kids on the end who was staring down at the table. He had long black hair that was covering his face. I went and sat down next to Lily, not making eye contact with anyone.
Everyone was silent as we all started eating toast. The school kids suddenly pushed their chairs back with a scrape and left, yelling about some football game. But then I noticed that one of them had stayed. The one next to Mikey. The one with long black hair.

"Oh no. I ain't being fooled that easily."I growled and pushed my chair back, standing up and glaring at them. It was really fucking hurting to talk.
"Frank please just eat something,"Lily sighed.

Gerard looked at me properly and blinked away tears in his eyes.
"Frank you dont have to talk to him or us or even look at anybody just- we're worried about you. You need to eat at least."Steven said quietly. I glanced at him and slowly sat back down, the hunger gnawing at my stomach being the only thing keeping me there.

Everyone was sitting in silence. There was barely a noise as we munched on toast and ate cereal. I looked across the table at Gerard. He was staring at me. Not eating at all just staring. It freaked me out so I looked back down at my bowl of cornflakes. They were soggy and disgusting and I had no idea where they came from.

I started staring at Gerard moodily. He was still staring at me. I took a mouthful of my cornflakes and cringed. They had been left way too long. Gerard finally looked away and took a bite of his toast. There was a knife in the middle of the table for butter and shit and he picked it up. My first thought was holy shit he's gonna kill himself but he just started scratching the table.

"Gerard please dont do that."Steven sighed. Gerard stopped and looked at him, blinking away tears slowly. I couldn't believe I was causing that. I felt terrible because it wasn't really Gerards fault. I was just being a complete sassy bitch about it all.

"Frank eat."Lily snarled next to me. I looked at her and something inside me just broke. Probably the dam holding back the waterworks because the next thing I knew I was sobbing on Lily's shoulder.

We stayed that way for what felt like forever but in reality it was only about a minute. I pulled away and looked at her through fresh tears.
"I'm so sorry Lily,"I coughed out. She just looked relieved.

I turned back to everyone else and stood up.
"I'm sorry for all this stupidity."I sighed and wiped away the tears.
"Frank its okay... You dont have to apologise..."Mikey smiled. I smiled at him then started walking out of the room.

"Frank wait where are you going?"Lily called out. I heard her chair move backwards and then footsteps. Her hand came down on my shoulder, halting me in my mission to get to school.

"I have to talk to someone. You have to go to school so no you cant come."I said not too kindly. I just wanted this to be fucking over. I was so sick of it all. I didn't have the energy to be nice to anyone. I needed to end it. Now.

"Frank..."Lily said, sounding completely defeated.
"No."I said and walked out the door. I started marching down the steps and up the street, ignoring the looks people were giving me. Douchebags.

"Frank! Wait!"Lily called behind me. I didn't stop.
"Frank if you're gonna talk to her you might wanna get dressed first!"I heard Gerard yell. That made me stop. I looked down and almost shit my fucking pants. I was still in my fucking pyjamas.

Immediately I started running back to the house. I felt so fucking stupid! I was fucking stupid for walking out dressed like this. No wonder people were staring. I rushed past Lily and Gerard at the doorway.

In about 5 seconds I was in my bedroom stripping down. That was probably a world fucking record or something for the fastest time up those stairs. In another 3 seconds I had my black skinnies on, the first t-shirt I grabbed and a hoddie to hide my bright red face.

"Frank can I please come with you?"Lily asked. She sounded so distraught.
"No. But I need you to."I growled at Gerard. He looked up at me shocked. They were both where I left them, leaning against the front door.

"Great okay I will drive us."Gerard's face broke into a smile as I ignored him and started walking out the door again. Gerard followed me quickly and rushed down to his car. We got into it silently and drove off, leaving Lily looking the most depressed I had ever seen.

-time lapse-

"Are you ready?"Gerard asked me as we walked up the corridor to the nurses clinic. It was extremely early so there were barely any kids around.
"Of this more than anything."I mumbled. It was still hurting to talk and it was pissing me off.

We walked inside slowly. Linda was nowhere to be seen.
"She must be getting a coffee in the staffroom."Gerard mumbled. I didn't say anything and walked over to a chair to sit down.

"I dont think she'll be long..."Gerard mumbled and sat down next to me. I didnt say anything, just stared at a scuff mark on the white linoleum floor as Gerard kept trying to talk to me. I would have said something but my throat was already killing me.

"Hey guys..."Linda smiled at us as she walked in. She glanced at our faces and hers just dropped completely.
"I need a throat lozenge or something."I croaked and stood up. I slowly walked over to her. I had no idea how to start. 'Hey I know you're my mum' was just way too... Ridiculous.

"Oh right. Uh I think I have some in here..."Linda moved over to her drawers and started puling them out. She opened the first one and shut it straight away but I still caught a glimpse of a photo frame. Somehow I knew what the picture was of.

"Uhh what was that?"I asked casually.
"What? Nothing just some things."Linda stuttered and produced a box of throat lollies. I thanked her and took one. The effect was almost immediate. My throat suddenly stopped burning. It was lovely.

I stood there as the lollie worked its magic and Linda and Gerard watched me turn it over in my mouth. Fuck it was awkward.
"So what have you guys got planned for today then?"Linda asked suddenly, forcing an air of cheeriness into her voice.

"Nothing much... I'm gonna go back home soon... I just have a couple of things to do..."I mumbled and turned away. I made eyes at Gerard, trying to get him to help but he wasnt looking at me.
"I have one thing I need to do and then I'm going to the magic bean."Gerard smiled at her and got up.

"So is that the only reason you came to see me? A throat lollie? Please tell me you didnt come to school just so you could get one."Linda chuckled as I faced her.

"No one of the things I need to do is at school."I smiled at her. We were dancing around the subject. All three of us knew the main reason I was here but no one wanted to mention it. At all.

"I think I might g-"
"Frank knows you're his mum!"Gerard blurted out. I glared at him for a split second before looking at Linda.
"Fuck..."She mumbled and looked down at her feet.

"I think I might just go-"Gerard started to say but I stopped him.
"You're staying here."I growled. He nodded and went back to sit down. Linda sat down at her desk so I sat down next to Gerard again.

We sat in silence for what felt like forever, the silence dragging on for fucking ages. I let my hands drop to my sides and rested my head on the back of the chair. I clenched my eyes shut and said,"If you knew where I was... And you were working here... Why didnt you come get me?"

"It took me quite a few years to work up the courage to leave your father and when I did t-to cope with all the shit he did to me and put me through I um I turned to drugs..."She said quietly. Fucking hell.

"Are you clean now?"I whispered. Fuck if she was still using I dont know what I would have done.
"No. That all ended almost a year ago. I- I'm disgusted in myself for this but I forgot about you. I left your father and was focusing on myself so much that I- forgot about you."Linda was crying. I was close to crying because that fucking hurt.

"I remembered you when I found a picture of you and me right after you were born. You were the cutest baby."Linda sniffed. I lifted my head and looked at her. She had the photo frame in her hands. I suddenly realised I was crying as well.

"Frank I have been working up the guts to go and see you. But its taken a lot of me to get this job and to actually get settled into a good enough life that I could take care of you with. I wanted to get you back the second I gave you away..."Linda had tears pouring out of her eyes but she wouldn't look at anything but the picture.

"Why didn't you at least tell me? Explain to me what my father was and why you couldn't get me out of that shit hole just yet? Do you know how much I got bullied and excluded in that place?"I closed my eyes and clenched my fists, trying to hold in the emotions raging inside of me.

"Frank I'm sorry. I had no idea what to do... I knew you would be all grown up into this gorgeous young boy that you are and I thought that maybe... You wouldn't understand and wouldn't want anything to do with me..."She looked up at me finally. She had a weird look in her eyes. Full of regret and sadness.

Without even realising it I felt my hand go to Gerard's. He grabbed it straight away, lacing our fingers together, and gave me strength and comfort.
"So what happened when I started here?"I asked her softly.

"Um. Because Gerard and I were good friends from the day Cole got burnt and Gerard brought him in so I knew he was from the halfway house and stuff and then on your first day I saw you and knew who you were but wanted to ask Gerard first so I said to him,'who's the new kid?' and he said that you just came from the orphanage which just confirmed that it was you and I- I-"She stopped and looked at Gerard.

I looked at him too just in time to see him stop shaking his head at Linda. He glanced at me then awkwardly started staring at the ceiling.
"You what?"I turned back to Linda fiercely. I didn't want her to say it. Not at all. If it was true my heart would probably fucking break into a million pieces and I would die.

"I told Gerard to get close to you so I could see where you were at over me and I dont know... "Linda sobbed. I dropped Gerards hand and stared at the back of his head. He was staring out the window at something.

"Gerard look at me."I demanded, fighting back the tears. I stood up and moved around to his face. He had tear tracks down his face but no actual tears in sight.
"Frank I-"
"No. Gerard just no. I told you how I felt about all this. I told you my fucking fears. You led me on! You fucking took my- fuck!"I grabbed at my hair and tugged, the pain relieving my frustration somehow.

"Frank please! At first it was just for Linda but then I fell i-"
"No! Don't you fucking say it! Dont you dare!"I screamed at him. He stopped talking and looked down at his hands that were clenched in his lap.

"Frank I think you need to take a deep breath and calm down."Linda said quietly.
"No. I think I need to go."I growled at her. She nodded and walked over to her desk.

I started walking out but Linda stopped me.
"Here... Take it."She shoved the photo frame into my hands. I stared down at it. Linda looked young and happy even though she was covered in sweat. The happiness radiating from her face changed it all. In her arms was a tiny baby with fists balled up looking like he was screaming his face off. I mumbled a thank you and walked out.