This One Is For You

~Jackson~
Tyler opened the door for me. "Hey babe, My parents are out for the day so i though you might want to hang out here" He said smiling. I sighed. "Yea" I said as i walked in and sat on the couch. He sat next to me.
"Look, Ty, We need to talk.." I started.
"what about?" He looked kinda confused.
I sighed. "So, Ty, you know i love you-" He cut me off. "Wait wait wait wait, What is this?!" He looked shocked. I rolled my eyes. "Let me finish! Seriously no speaking okay?" He nodded.
I started again "I love you Ty it's just i'm not...in love with you ,you know? And i don't deserve you, You're perfect and so many girls what you and i-i don't. I mean i love you but like a friend. I'm sorry but i can't do this. I can't pretend to be the perfect happy girl because i'm not. i'm breaking inside, i mean...i'm not okay, i'm sad and depressed and....this is hard to talk about, i'm sorry." I paused trying not to cry. "I can't do us anymore. Maybe in a while, maybe after i get over whatever is wrong with me right now but i can't lead you on, and i don't want you to wait for me, please , i want you to go out and find a girl that loves you. Find someone good for you Tyler, that girl isn't me. i'm sorry." I had tears falling down my face now. I hoped he didn't hate me, I needed Tyler even if it was as a friend.
"Okay...are- are you saying you need to break up with me because you're suicidal?" He asked. I cried. "I don't know! there is just so much wrong with me right now. You've got to understand. Please? I can't loose you, I need you to be my friend..please" I said. He nodded.

"I understand, I mean don't get me wrong i don't want you to dump me, I love you but I know what you mean. Just promise me you'll get help. I don't want anything to happen to you okay?"
I nodded a yes.
After a couple minutes i told him i had to go. Once i was in my truck i just drove around for a while. I turned on the radio, singing along to Sleeping With Sirens song Roger Rabbit.

I noticed it was 6:04. Later than i realized. Just as i started driving back home my phone rang in the passenger seat, I checked caller ID. It was Frankie.
"Yea?"
"Hey, how did it go with Tyler?" He asked.
"I ended it, we're still friends i think. i told him i needed time to figure out what was wrong with me, why i'm so sad all the time. He told me to get help and stuff. He understand i guess." I was crying again.
"Okay, meet me at the park in ten?" he asked.
"Sure"
He hung up and i drove to the park. He was already there, waiting by his car. I got out and he walked to me. As soon as he was close enough he hugged me.
"I'm sorry..."
He said.
We sat in the bed of my truck. i was laying down with my head in his lap and he was sitting with his back to the cab of my truck.
"I'm not even sure why i'm so upset! I broke up with him! " I said. He smiled a bit.
"You love him, Even as just a friend you need him, you're just upset, you've had a hard day" He said as a ran his fingers through my hair. It felt good. I smiled.
"He isn't the only one i need" I said. Frank looked down at me confused,
"I mean, You're important to me to now, you're my best friend, " I said not looking at him. He smiled.
"Okay," He said.
about fifteen minutes later he spoke again,
"Hey Jackson what did you mean what you said you were sad all the time? I didn't know that" He said. i sat up and looked away. Crap.
"I don't know...just depressed lately i guess. it's nothing" I said. He touched my shoulder.
"It is something. Have you ever....have you ever though about..suicide?" He whispered the last word. The tears started again.
I waited a minute to answer.

~Frank's point of view~
She didn't answer for a minute. Then i heard it. She whispered one small word.
"Yes"
Before i could do anything she got out of the truck, i followed.
"Jackson don't you dare walk away after something like that!" I said. She turned to face me and i saw she was crying.
"Shut up Frank!! i'm fine!don't worry about me!" She screamed.
"I can't not worry!! you tell me you want to kill your self and you expect me to say 'oh that's cool i wont try to stop you' ?!?! That is NOT how things work!!" I screamed back.
She rolled her eyes.
"Shut up!! You don't know anything! You don't know what it feels like knowing you have people but feeling so alone, and i mean i probably won't....but sometimes it gets so FUCKING hard" She yelled at me. I walked towards her and shook her shoulders.
"I don't know what it's like?! Oh really if i don't know what about this?!" I screamed and pulled up my sleeves, i had been careful to wear only long sleeved shirts around her, I didn't want her to see but now i needed to show her. She stared at my arms, covered in scars and cuts.
"Oh Frankie..." She whispered running to me. She hugged me, crying into my chest.
"I'm sorry, i'm so sorry i didn't know i...i..." She stopped talking. i hugged her back.
"It's okay,i don't make it a habit to tell people. The only other person who knows...knew was Gerard" i said.
after standing there for a while she had to leave, I followed her home making sure she got there safely then i drove home. Tomorrow was Monday...With me coming clean to Jackson and her breaking things off withTyler it would be an interesting day.

Notes

So mehh. I think im justgonna delet this.....