Under the willow tree...(edited)

Gerard didn't have a normal home life. Gerard had an older brother called Mikey, who hated him as he put it; "with the fire of a thousand suns!", he didn't remember his mother, and he'd never met his father. The man that Gerard had grown up calling "Dad" was not his dad...Terry was Mikey's dad, who the boys' mother had cheated on, resulting in the unexpected, and unwanted arrival of Gerard.

After 6 years of abuse at Terry's hand, because of her little indiscretion, she left, walked out in the middle of the night leaving Terry and the boys alone.

Up until that point, Gerard's life had been fairly normal; get up, breakfast, get dressed, school, home, dinner, bath, bed...rinse and repeat. Normal, see? But from the moment she walked out the door, his whole world turned to shit.

"GET YOUR FAT ASS UP AND GO TO SCHOOL, YOU LAZY PIECE OF SHIT!"

Terry screamed down the stairs.

Gerard groaned, rolling over and cursing under his breath. Why did that man have to be such an asshole all the time?...wasn't that tiring?

"Coming."

He called back, though it was highly unlikely that Terry had heard him, what with his face being buried in his pillow, oh and the fact that he probably didn't even wait for an answer before walking away, muttering curses and wishing the boy downstairs would just curl up and die.

Gerard dragged himself painfully to his feet, and winced at the many cuts and bruises that littered his pale skin. He pulled on a ratty but clean pair of jeans that on anyone else would've been skinnys, but on him we're verging on baggy, an old Green Day tee, and an even older, threadbare but somehow still warm, Misfits hoodie. Finally he stuffed his feet into a worn-out pair of Converse that had been Mikey's, but he'd out grown them and Gerard had rescued them from the trash. They were a size or two too small for Gerard, but when you have nothing...

Stomping up the stairs, out of the basement, Gerard hesitantly opened the door into the kitchen, scared as usual about what kind of greeting he'd receive today. To his relief he found the small room empty, and took his chance to grab something to eat. Quietly slipping across the room, he reached out towards the fridge, but just as he started to open the door, a large hairy hand crashed into it, wrenching it from his fingers and slamming it shut.

"Who the fuck said you could eat?"

Terry growled in his ear. Gerard quaked in fear.

"Fat little fuck."

He muttered, before raising his voice again.

"Fuckin' emo faggot like you don't deserve food!"

Then the older, heavier, and much stronger ma, punched Gerard in the gut, doubling the weaker male over and causing him to hit the floor with a thud, arms wrapped around himself and tears sliding from sunken eyes.

"Get up freak. Go to school."

And with a sharp kick to Gerard's ribs, Terry walked away.

Laying on the cold linoleum, shaking and sobbing, Gerard didn't hear when Mikey walked in.

"Well, well..."

He chuckled.

"Guess dad got to you first today..."

Crouching down at his side, Mikey grabbed Gerard's chin in his hard grip, lifting his face up to meet him eye to eye.

"You worthless piece of crap, why don't you just do us all a favour and just kill yourself...huh?..."

He spat before throwing the frightened youth back to the ground.

"Go on, put us all out of our misery..."

Then he stood and walked away, pausing in the doorway and turning to say, over his shoulder.

"By the way, I just confettiied your room with the homework that you spent all night doing. Good luck explaining that to your teachers."

Laughing loudly, he picked up his school bag and headed out the door.

Gerard groaned, pushing himself up onto his hands and knees and fighting back a wave of nausea, not that he had anything to bring up of course, but he didn't fancy coughing his lungs up on the kitchen floor thank you very much. Hauling his ass up, Gerard used the counter for support as his head spun slightly until he finally regained his balance. He figured that Mikey was probably telling the truth about his homework, but he returned to his room anyway, to get his school bag, sketch pad and pencils, that he kept hidden just in case. On reaching the bottom step Gerard sighed, his chin dropping to rest against his chest, as slow tears fell down pale cheeks. It was just as he'd imagined...tiny bits of paper, formally his history assignment, were scattered across the floor.

"Well, that's detention."

He whispered bitterly, before retrieving his bag and art supplies from their hiding place, and leaving for his day at hell.

Gerard had nearly a mile to walk, alone in the cold. Mikey had long since left, he had his own car and would go pick up his "gang" on the way to school. Gerard never got a lift, not that he'd accept it if they offered. The one and only time that Mikey gave him a ride, Gerard had ended up beaten and bloody, in a field two towns over...naked. Never again!

Today, he might just have said "yes" to a lift, it was just that cold, but he never got the opportunity, and so he began the long trudge to school.

When he eventually arrived, he realised that there was still a good hour before first bell, and decided to visit his favourite place in the world. Walking past the school gates, Gerard headed into the small park, abandoned now for several years, the play park rusted and forlorn looking, he knew he had this place all to himself...after all, who would want to go there?

Towards the back of the park, behind the jungle jim and broken swing set, stood a tree, a weeping willow, it's long low branches hanging to the frozen ground and creating a den of sorts, a hiding space that Gerard had used on many occasion when running from Mikey and his gang. Crawling in there now, the physically and emotionally exhausted boy curled in on himself, pulling his knees up to his chest, wrapping his thin arms around them, burying his head, and crying.

If only he had a friend to talk to, even just one, then maybe he wouldn't feel this way, maybe he wouldn't feel like dying. So many people had told him that killing himself would be for the best, and he was beginning to believe them.

Sobbing, shivering from the cold, curled up into a foetal position, Gerard slowly drifted off to a fitful sleep, not worried in the least about the prospect of missing school...because of course, who needs school when you plan to die tomorrow?

"FRANK!!"

Linda hollered in his ear, causing him to wake with a jolt, jerking backwards away from her loud, intrusive voice and promptly fall off the edge of his bed onto the floor with a grunt. It also caused his mother to collapse into a fit of giggles, as he peered up over the side at her, mumbling something about her being a "fucking child" and rubbing his newly sore ass. When she finally got ahold of herself, she told him the reason for her somewhat unconventional wake up call.

"Frank..."

She began, still trying to quell her laughter.

"I know we got here real late last night, and you haven't had that much sleep, but you start school tomorrow..."

Frank groaned at this, burying his face in his hands.

"...so we should really go get your schedule and books and stuff today, make sure you've got everything you need?"

She suggested, a hopeful smile tugging at her thin lips. He raised his head to look at her expectant face, did she really want to do this now? He'd just woken up, after a 14 hour drive that had them arrive at their new home in lovely, sunny Bellville (can you say "sarcasm"?) at the ungodly hour of 3am, and then they'd still had to make their beds before they could sleep. What time was it even? Frank picked up his phone from the floor next to him, pressed the on button and squinted at the small clock, 11:47am! Well, he'd had more sleep than he thought he had. Franks mum cleared her throat, regaining his attention. Oh yeah, she was waiting for an answer.

Planting a wide grin on his face, Frank nodded.

"Ok mumma, give me a few to get dressed? Maybe get something to eat?"

He wheedled, giving puppy dog eyes he knew she couldn't resist.

Smiling back with something like relief that she hadn't had to force him to go, Linda nodded happily, standing up and heading towards the door.

"I'll give you half an hour. Have a shower Frank, you stink..."

She giggled, ducking out the door quickly as Frank's left shoe became a missile, then sticking her head back in the room...

"Pancakes?..."

Frank grinned, nodding furiously.

"They'll be ready in 15, get in the shower."

She smiled, disappearing again, Frank listening to her soft steps as she headed down to the kitchen.

Frank yawned and stretched, pulling himself up off the floor and heading for his small bathroom. Huh, all his stuff was unpacked already. His shampoo and body wash, his hair gel and eyeliner, his mum had even dug out his best black towel, though he knew for a fact that it had been in the bottom of one of his unlabelled boxes, and she would've had to route around through a load of his other shit to find it. God he loved that woman. She must've got up early to unpack. He would've helped if she'd asked, but that was just how she was.

Frank grinned as he stripped off the Black Flag t-shirt and plain black boxers he'd slept in, turned on the shower checking the temperature, and stepped under the fast flowing water. At least they had good water pressure here, the last place Linda's work had sent them, he'd be lucky if there was enough pressure to feel like he was being pissed on. Frank giggled.

"Golden showers."

He whispered, making himself giggle more.

Once he'd finished washing his hair and body, Frank turned off the shower and stepped out, grabbing his towel and quickly drying himself. Looking in the mirror above the small basin he smiled, wiping away the condensation to see his reflexion. He looked good, even if he did say so himself. His hair was buzzed short at the sides and bleached white, though he really wanted to dye them fire truck red, and the rest was left longer and coloured black, falling forward to make a kind of fringe thing that, once he'd put the required amount of gel in, would come to a curl just under his right eye. Applying the gel to his satisfaction, Frank next turned to his eyeliner. Yes, he wears makeup...get over it. Picking the short pencil up, he'd have to ask his mum to get him another one soon, he carefully marked each waterline, perfect first time. He grinned, he always did have a steady hand.

"FRANK!...PANCAKES!"

Linda screamed up the stairs. Frank rushed back into his bedroom.

"COMING MUMMA!"

Opening his wardrobe, and marvelling once again that all his clothes were not only unpacked, but hung up neat and tidy, Frank grabbed his best pair of skinny jeans and a Smashing Pumpkins tee, pulling them on as quickly as he could. He even managed to only fall over once while struggling into the skinnys, quite the achievement. Then he ran from the room and down the stairs, two at a time, missing the last four all together, and skidding into the kitchen, much to his mother's amusement, as he nearly collided with the small breakfast bar that she'd set two plates of pancakes and strawberries on, along with two large glasses of milk.

Plonking himself down on a stool, Frank got stuck into his breakfast, though at this time it could technically be called lunch, grinning happily at Linda with strawberry juice running in a thin stream down his chin. Linda chuckled, shaking her head and smiling back as she, somewhat more sedately, ate her food.

When they'd both finished their meals, Linda took the plates and glasses over to the sink as Frank returned to his room to finish getting ready.

Going back into his bathroom, he picked his wet towel up off the floor where he'd left it in such a hurry to fill his stomach, and hung it over the rail on the wall. Then he brushed his teeth, making sure he'd got rid of any pesky strawberry seeds, and rinsed his mouth with mouthwash before returning to his bedroom once again and rifling through his wardrobe in search of his favourite hoodie, the one with a Halloween pumpkin face on the front, the one Tony had bought him. It made Frank sad to think that he'd probably never see his best friend again, but he didn't blame his mum for them moving, it was her job's fault, not hers.

Shaking off his sudden melancholy, Frank went in search of his Vans. He found one by his bed but the other one wasn't with it. It took him nearly a full minute of head scratching before he remembered that he'd thrown it at his mother's retreating figure earlier, and when he discovered it laying wedged between the door and an old chest of drawers, he couldn't help but grin.

Stomping his feet into the shoes, Frank picked up his cell and wallet, putting them in his hoodie pockets, and headed back downstairs to find his mother already waiting by the front door, car keys in hand.

"Ready?..."

She asked, the smile on her face making her look younger and more beautiful than she already did, and making Frank grin in return and nod his head in agreement.

"Cool, let's go."

She opened the door and ushered him out into the cold Jersey air. Frank shivered and hurried over to the car door, bouncing foot to foot in an attempt to keep warm while he waited for Linda to lock the front door, and unlock the doors to the car. Soon they were both out of the icy wind, and in the slightly warmer confines of the car, though it would take several minutes for the heat to kick in, and his mother assured Frank that they'd reach the school long before that happened. She was right, it took just three minutes to reach the prison looking building, and as she parked the car on the road, just past the gates, Frank got the sudden desire to run far, far away.

It wasn't that Frank was scared of school as such, it was more a case of a fear of the unknown. Would he fit in? Would he make any friends or would he be an outcast?...get called names...Emo...Faggot?...Freak?! His last school had been the worst for all that, but at least he'd had Tony there.

"Frank?...let's go."

His mother was already out of the car, leaning back in to snap him out of his thoughts. Smiling sheepishly Frank complied, dragging himself out of the small vehicle and slamming the door (cos that was the only way it would close properly) then following her towards the school.

Glancing around himself, Frank spotted a rundown play park. He was just about to look away when his eyes caught a small movement. At the back, behind a jungle jim that had definitely seen better days, there was a willow tree, it's thin branches waved in the stiff breeze, dancing and dusting against the cold earth. Frank froze, stopped dead in his tracks as his eyes were drawn to the figure of a boy, curled up and apparently asleep on the ground beneath the dubious shelter of the small tree.

"FRANK?...come on!"

His mother called from some distance ahead, not wanting to stand around in the cold for too long. Frank turned to look at her, frowning slightly and raising a finger in a "one minute please?" signal, before turning his attention back to the boy. Something about this didn't feel right to him, and he didn't like the thought of leaving the kid where he was. Unfortunately, Linda had other ideas.

"NOW Frank!"

She ordered, coming back to his side and steering him away from the park, and on towards the school.

"But mum..."

He whined, trying to get her to understand why he needed to stay, without actually saying why.

"As you've told me on many occasions, Frank..."

She sassed.

"...butts are for sex!..."

Then, grinning like a maniac at her own joke, and at her son's eye role, Linda dragged him off to the large grey building.

"Whatever it was you wanted to look at, I'm sure it can wait til we're done in there."

She said, pointing at the school. Oh well, perhaps she was right. Frank gave up his struggles and followed his mother inside, though he still couldn't get his mind off of that boy...he must be so cold laying there.

After they'd got his schedule and book list from the office, Frank and Linda headed back out towards the car. Frank of course was more interested in checking on the boy, but as they reached the spot he'd stood in before, and he looked across the playground, he was surprised to see that he was no longer there. Scanning the park, then the road he was standing on, Frank sighed...nothing. There was no sign of the boy at all.

Linda was now climbing into their car and calling him over, so with one final look to the tree, he got in, fastened his seatbelt, slammed the door and they were off.

Not looking back, Frank failed to see the thin boy as he pulled himself out of the bushes, fresh cuts and bruises covering his body. He also failed to see the three boys that were skulking away from the park, and the damage they'd caused.

Gerard really hated his brother sometimes.

Notes

Hi there chipmunks, how's you?

I'm editing all my old fics...enjoy.
xxx