I'll never let them hurt you, I promise

Gerard's POV~~

Once me and Frankie were clean and back in our clothes we head downstairs for breakfast even though it is past noon. As I sit on the sofa with my bowel of cereal I pat the seat next to me inviting frank to sit down and when he does we eat silently while watching crappy children's cartoons.
Once we finish eating I grab both the bowels and head into the kitchen placing them in the sink before pouring two glasses of orange juice then walking back to the room. however I'm met with a sleeping frank sprawled out over the sofa.
I cant help the smile which brakes out across my face as I watch him peacefully sleep. noticing how cute and innocent he looks in the moment as his chest lightly rises and falls from breathing and his eyes flutter from dreaming. I cant disturb the beauty so I try my hardest not to wake him.
I slowly and gently lift his head off the sofa cushion and replace it with myself, carefully resting his head back down onto my lap.

I sit there for a while watching crappy TV shows while subconsciously stroking a hand through Frankie's hair and sometimes running a finger over his cheekbone. However when my bladder starts screaming at me to go to the toilet I realise its almost five in the afternoon.
I gently move my legs a little before softly shaking Frankie's shoulders to wake him. he stirs slightly and mumbles a quite groan.
"come on sleepy bum, time to get up" I whisper into his hair before placing a small kiss on his head.
he doesn't answer.
I shake him again this time with a little more force
"come on Frankie baby" I say turning my voice up a notch. He rolls his body over until he's smothering himself into my jean covered leg mumbling "no's" and "tired"
I giggle at him sweetly before wiggling my legs underneath him. "hey" I smile "we've got a movie marathon to go to" I remind him "also I need to pee" i add as an after thought.
He groans again before shuffling his body until he's off me and curled up into a ball at the end of the sofa. a small laugh leaves my lips before I walk to the bathroom.
After peeing, I wash my hands and face before running a wet hand through my hair realising I don't look my best but it will have to do.
When I head back into he room Frankie's sat up watching TV with half lidded eyes
"hey baby" I whisper before sitting aside him cuddling into his side
"your mean" he reply's only making me smile
"we don't have to go" I say kissing his cheek noticing that his eyes seem to be insisting on closing.
"no" he whispers "I want to go im just extremely tired" he says before tilting his head to look at me a faint smile on his lips. I give him a small chase kiss before insisting him to put his shoes on before ushering him out the door and into my car.

Once we're at the cinema's Frankie insists on buying us popcorn even though I said just a drink would be fine. I think he likes the idea of accidently touching each other hands in the box he's a real hopeless romantic although he'd never admit it.
When inside the dark room we sit around the middle of the seat not wanting to be too far back or far forward. as soon as I sit I feel franks arm holding onto mine and his head resting on my shoulder, the movies start and I watch a happy smile on my face.

About one and a half movies in I tell Frankie I need the toilet which isn't a complete lie because ill probably do that as well but I really need a cigarette right now. so I slip past all the comfortably sat people and head outside.
Once out in the cold open air I pull my cigarettes and lighter out, putting one in-between my lips before lighting it and taking a big inhale. I lean my back against the cinema's wall with my head titled to the sky, inhaling then exhaling the toxic smoke from my caner stick.
Then just as im about to stub the stick I hear a faint shouting in the distance, one that resembles my name.
I turn my head to the side, throwing the end of the cigarette to the floor and instantly feel my gut fall through the floor. my legs want to run but they seem to be glued to the floor as the distant voice gets closer.
It's Bert running towards me, repeating my name over and over, the sound of his voce making my heart race with fear and my stomach churn as if im about to throw up. I beg my body to run away and finally it does, just as he's about to reach me. I turn back into the cinema and run, keep running until I find myself inside the boys toilet the last cubical the door locked and my back pressed hard against it.
The sound of my own heart beat and pumping veins seems to take over the sense of hearing for a moment, my visions blurs and I realise im crying. I slowly slid my back down the hard cold surface until Im sat on the dirty floor of the toilets back still pressed to the closed door.
Then suddenly the sound of my own being is disturbed by the gently knock against plastic and I realise someone is on the other side of the door.
"go away" I shout not knowing who's on the other side of the plastic door, im sure Bert dint follow me but I do not want to leave right now so who ever it is needs to go.
Yet I realise im wrong when I hear the sickly sweet voice coming through the door.
"please Gerard just hear me out"
"leave me alone" I say my voice sounding weak and defeated not strong and convincing like I wanted it to be.
my tears roll down my face dropping off my shin and falling onto my knees which im holding closely to my chest.
"Gerard" I cringe when I hear him say my name "im sorry ok, im sorry about what happened between us, im sorry I didn't treat you well" there a pause, a sigh, he seems genuine but this is Bert he's never genuine. "it wasn't always like that, wasn't always bad was it Gee"
I listen as his body slid down against the other side of the door "we were good at one point. me and you, we worked at one point" his words bring back painfully memories of him beating me and abusing me.
"you hurt me, used me" the shakiness in my voice shows how the emotion has taken over
"im sorry I hurt you Gee, but I promise I wasn't using you, I loved you. I love you"
there's a moment of silence, is he serious?
"remember the good times Gee?" he whispers "remember that time at the park? after your dad walked out on your mum? the swing were so much fun, you remember?" he asked
my mind runs through my memories and I finally understand what he's talking about and I remember the week my dad walked out on my mum leaving her a single parent of two. I felt like it was my fault. my fault my family was falling apart. I remember how Bert comforted me, cuddled me kissed me told me everything would be ok, took me to the park, pushed me on the swings, sat with me all night under the starts.
"yes I remember" I tell him truly
"we had fun didn't we" he asks and I don't know weather I should answer because, yes it was fun however it was one of the only very few GOOD memories we have together.
There's another moment of silence before I notice a hand sliding under the door
"Gee?"
"yeah"
"can you hold my hand?" the question is awkward and totally out of the question
After a few more moments of silence I think he realise I DO NOT forgive him for all he put me through
"can I just touch your hand? I miss you Gee, I miss touching you, holding you, I came all this way just to see you"
I ignore him again
"please" he pleads "just let me feel your skin"
"then will you leave" I whisper my forehead pressed against the plastic door
"then ill leave" he repeats
I think for a second and realise I want him to leave more then anything so I gently move my hand over his, resting it on his and letting his finger glide over my skin for a few moments before I pull my hand back to my body and without another word I hear the sound of him getting up off the floor and leaving the room.

After another minute or so I get up myself, washing my hand and face looking up into the mirror, making sure I don't look too bad, making sure the tear stained cheeks aren't too noticeable before heading back to frank.
I thank the gods that the room is still dark when I walk in, and frank smiles when he see me coming back his way. he immediately rests his head back on my shoulder whispering
"you took a long time"
"I had a smoke" I tell him wondering if I should tell him about what just happened but then I remember that frank has his pyitrist tomorrow so pissing him off is probably not a good thing seeing as though this is the calmest hes been in a while. I promise myself ill tell him another day. someday.

Notes

this took so long to write.
I kept writing it, deleting it, re writing it
I had writers block I think and everytime I tried to come up with this chapter my personal life effected it badly.
Anyway should Gerard tell Frankie?