Thank you New Jersey. You’ve been wonderful! I loved being on stage. It was such a rush; I could do this forever. I lived breathed and bleed this band.
We were going to a party that night; to look for someone from a label to finally listen to us. We were terribly picky about who we signed with, we didn’t want to “sell out”. Labels were starting to hate us. We packed up our equipment and headed to the party. When we arrived, there weren’t a lot of people; the house was dark, and seedy. To be honest it looked like a drug dealer’s house, but who am I to judge
The party was fun. I ended up talking to the guy that threw the party, his name was Shadon, he was pretty cool. As we were talking about our D&D groups some of his friend showed up and they asked me if I wanted to go in the back with them; I thought about it, what the hell I had nothing better to do so I went with them. As we walked to the back of the house I looked for my friends they were talking to random people around the room. We walked down a dark hall and entered a dimly lit room. One guy got out a small bag; he pulled out a spoon, syringe, lighter, needles, a big rubber band looking thing, and a film canister. He strapped the big rubber band around his upper arm and pulled it tight, as to cut off the circulation. He opened the film canister and pulled out a little baggy with white powder he poured some on to the spoon and held the lit the lighter underneath. After he had melted it he sucked up the liquid with the syringe through a piece of cotton. He tapped the syringe getting the air bubbles out and stuck it in his arm. After he was done Shadon turned to me and asked me if I had ever done it before. I shook my head I hate needles! He smiled and asked if I wanted any. I shrugged and thought “Sure, why not?” I said.
“Cool. Here watch me so you know how to do it.”
I watched him he did the same. When he was done he fixed up the syringe and handed it to me. The needle was shinny and long, it made my skin crawl. I grit my teeth and stuck out my arm and rolled up my sleeve, he tied me off; I was starting to have second thoughts but couldn’t back out now. He handed me the syringe and asked if I could do it myself. I nodded and held it up to my skin. The needle slid in, it burnt a bit. Shadon told me to go ahead and shoot it up. I slowly pushed the heroin into my blood stream. When it was gone, I slowly pulled it out, and rolled down my shirtsleeve. I felt my veins turn cold, my vision started to fade in and out then it hit me- I felt pure bliss I could feel the air around me swirl and I could feel the vibrations from people talking in the next room. The rest of the guys shot up. I told Shadon I needed a smoke; I walked outside and lit up. I thought about how I felt: it was good like I didn’t have a care in the world, and I loved it. I also realized how much I smoked maybe I should quite ‘hmm no I can’t I’ll just cut back a little.’ I got done with my cigarette and went back into the house Shadon found me and asked me how I felt. I told him I felt so unbelievably good he couldn’t imagine. He chuckled and asked if I wanted to hang out tomorrow. I accepted. The rest of the night we threw back shot and continued to get high. I avoided my friends I knew they wouldn’t approve of my new found joy.
I woke up the next morning with a hangover from hell and then I remembered how good I felt when I had heroin. So I got dressed and headed over to Shadons house with some money. When I got there the house was already clean. I knocked on the door and Shadon answered with a smile on his face. Hey, he said a little too happily for me. I just grinned at him and told him I needed more. His smile got bigger and then he told me to sit down and he disappeared. While he was gone I let my eyes wonder and my mind run wild, I saw on the table there was a deck of cards on the table. I wondered what it was like to be a deck of cards, being slammed on the table, bent, and shuffled. Then I thought to myself, "You need a life." He came back with three black and gray film canisters. Wow what did he think I was going to do, not come back for a month? He sat them down in the able and said that should last me a week or so. I nodded and asked how much I owed him. He thought for a moment and said, “150 should do it.” I reached in my coat pocket and found a note when I was reaching for the money. It read: Jerry’s Lounge 8:00!!! I had a show tomorrow night. I stuck it back into my pocket and handed him the money. We sat around, shot up, and talked. Then it came time for me to go, my girlfriend was coming over and I was planning on proposing to her that night. I had the ring and everything. When I got home I sat the film canisters on my nightstand and the doorbell rang. I ran up the stairs and answered it, it was her. I smiled and we kissed. She was beautiful, long chocolate colored hair, and a beautiful smile. We went downstairs to my room I went over to my night stand grabbed a film canister and the ring box off my night stand and told her I had to go to the bathroom and I would be back in a little bit. I went to the bathroom and shot up again. I hid my syringe and heroin in the medicine cabinet, and went back to her with the box in hand. When I opened the door she was standing there with a film canister of heroin she looked at me and told me she didn’t need this I tried to explain, but I couldn’t. She stormed out the house slamming doors behind her. How could I be so stupid! How was losing her better than being high.
For the next week I hid in my room and shot up. The phone rang nonstop- I never answered it, I just sat there and watched the clock to see how long they would let it ring. One time someone let it ring for twenty minutes. I hadn’t shown up at Jerry’s Lounge for the show; I hadn’t done anything. People knocked at my door. Someone even tried breaking in. I did think about hanging myself, I thought I had nothing to live for because my girlfriend had left me. I was going to do it. I tied a noose out of dull, white rope and hung it from the banister above the stairs. I stood on the stairs where the noose could still reach around my neck and I stepped off the stair, as I started blacking out from lack of oxygen I heard panicked voices and felt some one pick me up. It was my best friend.
A week later I woke up in the ICU ward in the hospital. I looked to my left and saw a poor little girl lying in her bed surrounded by tubes and monitors. On the other side of me was my girlfriend. She was sleeping so peacefully. I laid back down and thought about what had happened. Then I remembered the heroin I remembered the high, and instantly wanted it again.
The nurse walked in and was glad to see me awake. She took my vitals and notified my family. My girlfriend woke up with a smile. I noticed she was wearing the ring I had bought her. She kissed me and told me we could go home soon. My mom and dad took me home. My friends were there and were all concerned about me. All I could think about is the heroin in my room. I excused myself clamming I was tired and went to my room. Once I got out of site I ran to my room and started searching for my fix. Then someone came in behind me and told me to start packing my shit. It was my dad he had a look of disappointment on his face. He knew what I was looking for. “I’ve already went through your room. There’s nothing here anymore. Your mom and I are going to take you to I rehab clinic. You need to start packing now.” And with that he walked away. I broke down how could it have become that bad in just a few days?
I grabbed a few things I wanted to take with me, and some clothes. I walked upstairs my friends were lined up by the door to see me out. I started to cry. I kissed my girlfriend and hugged my brother and thanked my best friend for saving me. I walked to the car and we drove away.

Notes

if i get enough coments i cont.