“I’m not sure about this”

Jenny sighed, tucking her fringe behind her ears as the group stared at the sign leading into London. “It’ll be suicide, there’s no way we can go in there” She added miserably. Billie stepped forward from the line of survivors, balancing a cigarette between his teeth as he stuck his hands deep into his jean pockets as he stared up at the sign. He took off his sunglasses, puffing out a cloud of smoke before turning back to the group; dark circles ghosted under his eyes as he narrowed his eyes. “And what do you suggest we do?” He asked callously, his eyes focused sharply on the young girl before him as she shifted closer to Levi, suddenly feeling nervous of his emotionless gaze. “You’re sick Jennifer, if you don’t go, you’ll die. Is that what you want?” He said.

Jenny’s eyes dropped shamefully to the floor, she had really messed things up with him this time. He had never used her full name before and the way he was looking at her, the way he was talking to her, it was full of hatred; as though he was sick of the sight of her.
She didn’t mean to hurt him like this.

Jenny silently shook her head, refusing to meet Billie’s gaze as he flicked away his cigarette butt; his eyes still staring at her. “Well, what are we waiting for? Let’s go” Andrea said cheerily, a smile beaming from her face as she stepped forward to join Billie. Her eyes quickly fell upon Gerard and Frank, her blue eyes narrowing slightly as she studied them intently. Gerard hadn’t been the same since their encounter this morning; he was quieter, closed off...more obedient. Andrea placed her hands on her hips, feeling somewhat proud of her achievement.

She had broken Frank’s protector...

Now all she had to do was move onto phase two.

Frank shook his head, cautiously eyeing Gerard out of the corner of his eye as he turned to face them. “Not like we have a choice” Frank replied bitterly as he and Gerard walked past them; their faces painted with solemn expressions as though the weight of the world had finally come crashing down on them both; killing them in the process.

Except it didn’t. Gerard knew this more than anyone. Instead of killing them like it should have, it changed them. It twisted and bent them until they were almost unrecognisable. Life seemed to have grown darker, as though the final shred of hope and goodness was gone. He felt Frank squeeze his arm, smiling sweetly at him as they walked through the desolate streets. He forced a smile in return, the guilt still coursing through his veins as he struggled to come to terms with what had happened, what he had done. He loved Frank, perhaps more than anyone he had ever met before and he knew he would do anything to protect him.

But...

What if protecting him meant doing something terrible?

Something unforgivable?

Gerard sighed, it was too late to change the past now. He had no choice but to live with the decision he had made. He took hold of Frank’s hand as they as they made their way towards the city, his mind replaying the memories of that night with Andrea over and over again, haunting him, pushing him to the brink. “You ok?” Frank asked, concern filled his voice as he stopped them in the centre of the road. Gerard took a deep breath, putting on a smile as he lied to his boyfriend. “Of course, why wouldn’t I be” He replied, letting go of his hand and shoving them into his pockets.

Perhaps he was wrong. Perhaps the weight of the world had killed them that day; killing the people they once were. It made Frank a better person, a more loving, more caring person than he could begin to describe. As for him, well it changed him for the worst. It made him do things he hated himself for. How can I possibly live with myself after what I’ve done? He thought miserably as he looked up at the city buildings which towered over the group.

******
Andrea crawled out of her sleeping bag, dragging her hands down her tired face as she moved to sit in front of the fire. Levi sat close by her, still staring into the flames. The camp was silent, nothing except for the distant sounds of dead shuffling through the streets below them everyone else had gone to bed hours ago. Andrea sighed, glancing over at Levi who hadn’t moved since he had arrived on the rooftop this evening.

“I didn’t know Billie and Jen had a thing” she said, breaking the silence. Levi shook his head, not daring to look up from the fire as he sighed irritably to himself. “They didn’t, they’re just friends” He replied coldly. He took a hipflask out of his pocket, pouring the bitter liquid down his throat Right now he felt helpless,. He had a strong urge to drink away the guilt, to blot out the pain. Tears welled in eyes; he quickly rubbed them away. He couldn’t let Andrea see him cry, he had to stay strong. He had no choice.

But how could he when it felt like he was losing the woman he loved

He took another swig from the flask but found it to be empty. He threw it to the ground; growling with annoyance as he curled his hands into fists. “Listen, don’t worry about her. I’m sure she still loves you” Andrea said reassuringly, placing an arm around his shoulders. Levi shrugged, almost loving her warm touch as she held him close. It had been ages since he and Jenny had even kissed let alone do anything else. All he wanted was the intimacy they once had but she seemed to be enjoying Billie’s company more than his.

“She doesn’t care Andrea, not really. I don’t think...I just feel awful” He moaned, his eyes filled with sadness as Andrea tried to catch his eye. He couldn’t bear to look at her. Not with these feelings and certainly not with the guilt that accompanied them. Suddenly, he felt a gentle hand touch his leg. He looked up and found himself gazing into Andrea’s murky blue eyes, unable to stop the growing smile that was forming in the corners of his mouth. “You’re a good person sweetheart; it’s about time you realised that.” Andrea replied, her soft voice echoing through Levi’s mind as he felt the feeling tug away at him. He stared into her eyes, unable to look away. His heart pounding as his cheeks flushed a bright red.

Andrea closed her eyes as Levi stared longingly at her lips, the temptation was too strong. Andrea edged closer to him, her arm wrapping around his waist. Levi’s heart skipped a beat; he hadn’t felt this way in years. He knew this was wrong. He loved Jenny... and yet, those lips were all he wanted right now. He lifted a hand to Andrea’s chin, pulling her close as he pressed his lips firmly against hers; running his fingers through her blonde hair as he kissed her harder, loving every moment of this.

The guilt vanishing from his mind as all memory of Jenny, for a while, ceased to exist.

Notes

Levi cheated on Jenny!
and Gerard has betrayed Frank....but how?

Is Gerard cheating on Frank or is something darker going on?
find out soon :D

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Also my new video is up, I'm talking about homophobia as I felt like it was something I needed to address x http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G_qDUrU04n0