My Chemical Affair

Gerard’s POV
As I Wake up the next morning with no recollection of the night before I look around and see empty bottles all around me. I look at my phone to see if that has any clues for me and I see a text from someone and I’m hoping that it’s Rachie. But alas it’s not it is from Lexi.
Lexi: Hey babe last night was great ;)
Gerard: What exactly happened last night? :s
Lexi: Don’t play we had sex silly and your were amazing <3
My heart instantly sank to the floor and all I could think of is what is Rachie going to do so I text her
Pumpkin pie: Rachel I love you and can you tell me if you see me last night
Mermaid: GO AWAY and yes I seen you last night and I know everything.
Pumpkin Pie: Baby………..
Mermaid: IM DONE WITH YOU …… LEAVE ME ALONE
And in that moment my heart broke. Did I really just loose the love of my life? I just can’t deal with this so I find the unopened bottles and crack 2 open and down 1 before I got to school. And the second one I finish on the way to school. I pull up to my high school and I run into Mikey who seems very pissed. I try to walk straight up to Mikey “what’s up” all he can to is push me “how the fuck could you gee you broke her heart” great thanks for bring that back into my mind I drink out of my water bottle which isn’t water but who needs to know. I go to classes and try to get all my work done while I constantly check my phone and with each hour that goes by I drink more and more “water” till the end of the day comes and I’ve finished 3 bottles of “water”. Mikey makes a comment of needing to go to the mall so I drive him to the mall and before I can ask he jumps out of the car. I park and finish my other bottle of jack. The thought occurs to me maybe I should go and check on Mikey. I walk in and wander around looking for Mikey; which is really hard to do this drunk. And then I see Mikey and Lizzie walk out of only nice restaurant that’s in the mall and then Emmett walks out with Rachie. I start to see red and apparently Mikey and Lizzie see me. Emmett walks off to get Rachie a soda so I take my opportunity. I walk over “What the fuck is going on here? You love me one day then hate me and want nothing to do with me the next.” She gets this glare on her face which is so freaking cute but my drunken brain won’t process. “This is not the time or the place for this Gerard. So please go away”. “NO, this is such a typical child move run away when things get a little hard or when things don’t go your way. How could I have ever thought we could work? Stupid freshman.” I see the tears well up in her eyes “Gerard are you drunk again?” and my only reply is “what is it to you not like you care at all” Then I get a slap across my face “ HOW DARE YOU; YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW I FEEL YOU SELFISH HEARTLESS PRICK; YOU HAVE A SERIOUS PROBLEM WITH DRINKING AND YOU FUCKED LEXI YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE; SO DON’T YOU DARE EVER TALK TO ME LIKE THIS YOU DUMBASS SENIOR.” She storms off and I’m left there with my sore face, bruised pride, and shattered heart. Mikey looks at me “just go to the car and wait Gee, she is trying as hard as she can to keep it together.” So I solemnly walk back to the car and wait for 2-3 hours as I sit there and stare at the bottle and contemplate weather or not to drink it or pour it out. And that’s when Mikey came out and got into the car “way to fuck everything up Gee” he sees the bottle “what the fuck are you doing with that?” I look at him with eyes filling up with tears “trying to figure out whether or not to drink it and be numb or dump it out and try to figure out a way to make everything up with Rachie”. Mikey looks into my eyes “do you want an honest answer?” I nod unable to say a word “Then make it up to her and quit the heavy drinking”. So I offer to split the bottle with Mikey while I think of a way to win her back. He agreed and I started the car to head back we get back to the house mom is walking out so Mikey hides the empty bottles and puts the other bottle into his backpack. And we walk in we go straight down to Mikey’s room. “What can I do to win her back?” Mikey sits there pondering for a moment “what about writing her a song?” I get all wide eyed “Holy shit Mikey you are a genius” Mikey starts to play a cord “Hey that cord could work I have some words in my head right now. I’m gonna write two songs cause one just won’t suffice.” So we start to write.

Gonna take off all my skin,
Tear apart all of my insides,
When they rifle in,
Mom and Dad think you'll be saved,
They never had the time,
They're gonna medicate your lives,
You were always born a crime,
We salute you in your grave.

Can't find my way home,
But it's through you and I know,
What I'd do just to get back in her arms,
Can't find my way home,
But it's through you and I know,
What I'd do just to get back in her arms.

[Spoken in background]
(Well my gun fires
seven different shades of shit,
So what's your favorite color, punk?)

Do you wanna hold my hand?
Could you sign this photograph,
'Cause I'm your biggest fan,
Would you leave me lying here?

We're not here to pay a compliment,
Or sing about the government,
OxyContin genocide,
Adolescent suicide,
I'll give you my sincerity,
{Don't give} a fuck about a Kennedy,
Here's what I've got to say.

Can't find my way home,
But it's through you and I know,
What I'd do just to get back in her arms,
Can't find my way home,
But it's through you and I know,
What I'd do just to get back in her arms.

No way home why
[x4]
[in background]
We've got to go
[x7]

Can't find my way home,
But it's through you and I know,
What I'd do just to get back in her arms,
Can't find my way home,
But it's through you and I know,
What I'd do just to get back, well, in her arms.

I can't find the way
[x6]

Come on angel, don't you cry
[x4]

Mikey looks shocked “Holy hell batman that’s beautiful gee what is the name of it?” I look away “My way home is through you. And I wrote another one if you want to hear it”. Mikey gets me to look in his eyes “Yes this is how to tell her how you feel so of course I want to hear it I want to know how you feel”. So I take a deep breath

I never said I'd lie and wait forever
If I died, we'd be together
I can't always just forget her
But she could try

At the end of the world
Or the last thing I see
You are
Never coming home
Never coming home
Could I? Should I?
And all the things that you never ever told me
And all the smiles that are never ever...
Ever...

Get the feeling that you're never
All alone and I remember now
At the top of my lungs in my arms she dies
She dies

At the end of the world
Or the last thing I see
You are
Never coming home
Never coming home
Could I? Should I?
And all the things that you never ever told me
And all the smiles that are ever gonna haunt me
Never coming home
Never coming home
Could I? Should I?
And all the wounds that are ever gonna scar me
For all the ghosts that are never gonna catch me

If I fall
If I fall (down)

At the end of the world
Or the last thing I see
You are
Never coming home
Never coming home
Never coming home
Never coming home
And all the things that you never ever told me
And all the smiles that are ever gonna haunt me
Never coming home
Never coming home
Could I? Should I?
And all the wounds that are ever gonna scar me
For all the ghosts that are never gonna...


Mikey looks at me with tears almost in his eyes “what’s the name of that one?” “Ghost of you” I try to wipe away the tears from my eyes “Gerard I think the first one is a little more romantic but both are great songs we can use both for the band but for you singing to Rachie I would go with my way home is through you”. “Do you really think she will forgive me I mean I was a complete ass and I will give up drinking for her if she wants me to”. Mikey smiles and nods “that’s great” “she makes me want to be better than I am she makes me strive to do better” I’m going to blame the alcohol for my honesty. But I love how it feels to be this honest. We end up passing out thank god it was Friday. But I suddenly get woken up by Mikey “dude I’m not Rachie stop trying to fuck me” he is laughing as he says it. “My bad I just miss her so much lying next to her cuddling with her and yes the sex was also nice but just her presence is what I miss the most”. “Then show her that” is all Mikey can utter as he finishes the bottle. “When should I do this?” Mikey thinks for a minuet “I can ask her to come over and just tell her you’re not here. You do know she doesn’t really like Emmett; she loves you she is just going out with him so she doesn’t have to think about missing you so much but not even that works”. It sounds mean but this brings a smile to my face “ I broke things off with Lexi” Mikey nods “good” and we bust up laughing “dude do we text her in the morning when we are sober or what?” Mikey gets this worried look “I’d say when we are sober” which in all honestly is a better idea than trying to do this drunk. And I get an idea I run up to my room and grab my sketch pad and run back down to Mikey’s room “should I frame this and give it to her?” I show him the mini comic I made with her pretty much talking about how I’m unworthy of her and how perfect she is for me and Mikey nods excited “she will love it ; she can’t say now to that I mean come on it shows her in all her glory”. Which it does show her in all her beauty. So I find a frame and frame it for her making sure it’s put in a safe place where it won’t get destroyed by our drunken stupid selves. And we come up with this whole plan while drunk writing it down so we don’t forget it when we sober up. And it’s a great plan if I don’t say so myself. I keep closeing my eyes to see her smile; I love seeing her and remembering everything that makes me remember how much I love her. All the reasons I fell in love with this incredible woman. Yes women ……. I can’t believe I called her a child if anything I was more of a child in the situation then she was; she was mature way beyond her years to be able to cope the way she did with everything I said and did. So I finally fall asleep with the excitement of what I get to attempt to do on the morrow. I think as hard as I can like somehow it will get to her I love you my wonderful Mermaid and I will get you back whatever it takes I will do. ANYTHING!

Notes

sorry if i miss spelled anything i'm half asleep rite now lol i hope you all like it let me know what you think and i don't own anything but the story line and some of the characters and as always

Stay beautiful and Always keep it ugly