The Boy With Scars

~Frank's point of view~
I can't fucking believe gee did this to me...he knows i hate talking to new people! i should just leave...
"Oh, uhh...hi? So you're Gerard's new friend?" Mikey asked and i just nodded.
"I'm Ray, Nice to finally meet the guy Gee's been talkin' about." Ray said.
"Hi...." i said quietly. Oh gosh they probably thought i was some kind of freak. Why did Gerard want me to sit with them? he knows i like sitting alone...
"Guys, Frankie is my friend so he will be hanging out with us from now on. Right Frankie?" Gerard looks at me and i nod unsure,but still i stay silent. As the three guys continue into a conversation i sit there listening, occasionally adding to the conversation but for the most park staying quiet. As Mikey and Ray talk Gerard turns and looks at me
"I'm sorry if you don't want to be here Frankie its just... I'm worried and i- this isn't a good time to talk about this, later kay?" Gee asked and i shrugged.
"Sure, whatever" i said slowly growing more pissed off at him. God he should have just let me stay where i was alone. I did better alone, I liked it when i had no friends because no friends means no one worrying about me and that means no one bothers me about what i'm doing. i looked over at Gee and saw him smiling at something Ray said. He looked so happy, Right then he looked down at me, his face lighting up and for a moment i was truly happy...then i remembered everything that was wrong with me.

~Gerard's point of view~

-After School-

"Hey Frankie! Where are you going?" i called after him as he walked away from the school. We usually walked together.
"Away from here!" He screamed over his shoulder,i ran to catch up with him,
When i finally fell into step besides him i looked down at him. He seemed upset
"Frankie? You okay?" i asked halfway to our houses not being able to handle the silence anymore.
"My name is FRANK not Frankie and No! I'm not o-fucking-kay!!" He said loudly. i was confused.
"What....What did i do?" i asked and he stopped mid-step to turn and look at me
"YOU WORRY ABOUT ME AND GET ON MY FUCKING NERVES!! I was just fine before you came along and started to actually care about me goddammit!! I LIKE being alone i LIKE having no one care about me and you screwed that up!! i was going to graduate then go away and never see anyone from this shit town again!!" Frankie screamed at me and i realized what this was, I noticed when anything with feelings came up he would avoid the subject completely. Me and him had become good friends and by worrying about him he felt the need to push me away.
"Frankie...You don't have to go through this alone!! I'M HERE!!! " i said back loudly and he rolled him eyes.
"YOU DON'T GET IT. I DON'T WANT YOU TO BE" he said and i sighed
"Are you really that FUCKING BROKEN you can't see?!?! i WANT to be there for you! i WANT to help you and god Frank!! SOMETIMES PEOPLE LIKE TO FEEL NEEDED OR WANTED OR CARED ABOUT OR JUST LOVED!!! Now i see you don't feel any of that for anyone! have fun living alone for the rest of your sad life, not that it will be much longer. I'm done!" I said as i felt tears falling down my cheeks. i felt a bit bad, i didn't really mean those last parts but i was pissed off and just trying to hurt him.
"I-i...This was a mistake...i should have never let myself..." He said almost to himself. Than added louder to me
"FUCK YOU!! YOUR SUCH A JERK I HATE YOU!!!!" He yelled running away with tears in his eyes.

is that really how our friendship ends....i tried to wipe my tears but they just fell harder. He couldn't be gone...i needed him....

~Frankie's point of view~
I can't believe i had just fucked that up! The one friendship i had!! the only person i cared about...the guy i had lov- No!! i couldn't let myself even think it or it would hurt so much more! I ran upstairs to my room and threw myself on my bed sobbing into my sheets. He probably fucking hated me now. I don't want him to hate me...i really really don't but i don't know what to do! I screwed that up big time....i rolled over and grabbed my phone and dialed my cousin Tessa's number. She was two years older and lives a three days drive away but she had always been there for me when i really needed her.
"Frankie?! i haven't talked to you in forever!" She said happily and i cried harder.
"Oh my god!! Tess!!! it's all my fucking fault!! i screwed it up and now he hates me!!!" i cried harder and harder as i talked.
"Woah Frankie...calm down and explain okay ?" She said in a sweet voice. I had called before and told her about Gerard, told her about how i liked him, as more than just a friend.
"Gee!!!!The guy i told you about!!! we had a fight and now he hates me and i love him and i don't know what to do i can't i-i i'm not i don't know!!" I screamed tears running down my cheeks. I wasn't even making sense.
"Is your mother home?" She asked sounding worried and i screamed "No!! she's gone on a business trip!! she will be gone for a week!"
"Okay calm down. tell me what happened."
I told her everything in exact detail.
"I'm sure he doesn't hate you. Just talk to him" She said, i could tell she was worried i'd do something to myself.
"I CAN'T HE HATES ME OH GOD WHY DO I EVEN EXIST?!?!" I was still crying hysterically and she started to get really worried.
"Oh Frankie, Sweetie i love you, you're like a little brother to me you always have been and if for no other reason you exist because i need you!" She said, it sounded like she was crying. i shook my head no even though she couldn't see me
"No...you don't" i whispered.
"I love you Tess, I have to go....Goodbye" i said.
"No Frankie! don't do anything stupid! i'm coming over to your house as soon as i can okay? I'll stay with you till your mother gets home! i love you." She said
"Thank you....thank you..." i said then hung up. I screamed into my bed again. I just couldn't make the tears stop! i knew how to end this...I went and got my blades, still crying, my vision blurry i ran one up and down my arm until the pain hurt less. i was still crying but eventually i fell asleep where i sat on my bedroom floor.

I didn't leave my room except to go to the bathroom four four days. my mom would be home in three so i wasn't worried about anyone finding me here. I had crawled up into bed and that's where i lay right now. I was about to drift off to sleep again when my phone rang.
"Frankie? i'm outside..." Tessa said

Notes

omg! sorry i took so long to update! comment and let me know what you think? Thanks!
~MattyTheKilljoy~