I'm Not Okay

*Unknown POV (for now)*

I was standing on a street corner minding my own business with my hood pulled over my head and my hands buried deep in my pockets. I may have looked suspicious I, a 30 year old man, standing there by himself and if you got a close look you would have noticed my hardened and crazy looking eyes and a scar across my cheek. But no one dared, they could even sense a bit of danger radiating from me that made them walk to the other side of the road from me. All expect for one little dip shit.

I was about to take a step away when I felt a body slam into me and make me stumble. I looked up and was about to cuss the dude out when I got a good look at his face. My breath stopped and I stared at him wide eyed. He had long greasy black hair, hazel eyes lined with eyeliner that was running down his cheek from crying, and a little pixie nose. I would know that face from anywhere. I tuned in back to my surroundings instead of focusing on the young teen.

“I-I’m s-s-so sorry,” he sobbed. In all honesty he sounded pathetic. A teenage boy sobbing and crying, what a wimp.

“It’s okay,” I disguised my voice, making it sound deeper than what it was. He nodded and ran off. But not before I could finally figure out who it was. I glared after him and growled. I had to go tell my brother that I found the little brat.

(a/n I was so tempted to stop it here but I’m giving you a bit more. Be glad)

*Back to Gerard!*

I ran away from the man, not caring what happened to him. All I cared about was getting away from the hospital and my failed life. I failed Mikey. I failed protecting my little brother, something I told myself I would never do. Ever again. Not after.

“No Gerard,” I whispered to myself. “Don’t think about him. That will only bring back more painful memories you can’t deal with.” I wiped my eyes and looked around. I somehow managed to get myself all the way downtown. But that was fine with me. The farther away I was form that hospital and Pete was fine with me. I realized that I was abandoning Mikey, but, I mean I already failed him. What’s me abounding him going to matter anyway? Not like anything bad was going to happen to me out here.

I sighed and sat on the curb right across the street from a bar. I put my head in my hands and leaned them on my legs. I was a 15 year old boy, out in the middle of downtown New Jersey, all by myself, right across the street form a bar. Wow I’m smart. I felt my phone vibrate and pulled it out of my pocket checking to see who it was. It was Pete. I just ignored the message. It probably wasn’t the smartest thing for me to do but I don’t really care. I was still pissed at him.

I sighed again and watched all the sober people walk into the bar laughing and having a good time come out drunk and staggering around the street knowing in the morning that they will regret it but then still come back wanting more. That’s the way of life I guess. You do something you regret in the morning but still can’t help but craving it later. I was about to stand up and walk back because it was getting to be dark and even no matter how stupid I am, I know not to be out at dark in New Jersey. Especially downtown. One of the first rules you’re taught in this game people call live but to some is survivor.

I felt someone push me back down my shoulders and I feel back down on the curb, I sensed someone coming to walk onto the left side of me and cross their arms. From their complexions I could tell that they were both fit and ready to bash my face in. I knew I should have gotten up earlier.

“I-I don’t have any money…” I croaked out. I looked up to the leader scared and immediately recognized him. He was the guy I ran into earlier today. This is not o-fucking-kay I thought to myself.

The leader smirked and leaned down. “Oh we don’t want any money, we want you.” He stood up and looked to his partner.

As soon as he spoke, I knew that voice. I would know that voice form anywhere. I did spend the first 10 years of my life with him.

I whispered the one word I wished would never pass my lips ever again. One I thought I would never have to say ever again.

Notes

oOOoOoOoOoOoOOoOoOoOoOooOh shit....hes back

Shout out to Audrey (who should really make an account here) for helping me come up with this chapter.

Anyway, please comment what you thought <3 Love you!