Save Yourself, I'll Hold Them Back

How long have I been driving? I wasn't sure. My body was focusing on the driving, but my mind was on Gee, Patrick, and the police.
Gee was crying softly, cradling in the passenger seat. His cries were suffocating my existence. I let one hand free from the steering wheel and placed it on Gee's back. He hardly cringed. He sniffed as he wiped his tears. He sat correctly in his seat and weakly asked, "Where are we?"
"We're still in town, but not far from leaving it."
Gee looked at me, "We can't leave. We have to help Patrick."
I shook my head, "How could we? If we show up to the police, to the hospital-they'll take us away," my mind flashed back images of Dr. Laguna's bloody body, "We can't go back."
Gee shouted, "Maybe that's what we need to do! Frankie, please. We need to do this. Let's go back and help-"
I slammed my foot against the brake, causing the car to come to a sudden stop. Gee flew forward, but his seatbelt pushed him back against his seat. His eyes were wide, frightened.
"We can't go back. I don't want to leave Patrick but I committed murder, Gee." I turned to him and held his hand, "If I go back, and they find out I committed Dr. Laguna's murder, I'll never see you again." His eyes locked into mine. I added, "I don't want to be apart from you."
Gee stared at me. He then looked away, "Then what do we do? Where do we go?"
I sat back in my seat, "I'll think of something. But for now let's find a cheap motel to spend the night in."


That night we were able to find a room downtown. It wasn't pleasant, but it had what we needed. A bed, tv, and bathroom.
Gee stayed inside while I went to the side of the building to the vending machine full of snacks. I searched through the choices before finding a snickers candy bar. I put in 75 cents and pushed in, "E3". The snack was close to falling-but the machine malfunctioned. I hit it, hoping it would cause the machine to shake and the candy bar to fall. It didn't budge. I hit it again. No budge. I became angry, my hand forming into fists. I repeatedly hit the machine, causing it to shake. I screamed out as I hit it over and over again as my head was drowning in voices. They all collided into one dark, deep, voice. It said, "You're angry, afraid, and selfish." I tightened my jaw as I punched the glass with all my might-the glass shattered. I felt sharp daggers puncture my skin.
I backed away slowly.
I stared at the broken machine in disbelief.
I shut my eyes, to calm the voices.
When I re-opened my eyes, the machine's glass was fixed. It was as if it was never touched. It was just another illusion that my mind made. And suddenly, the candy bar fell.
With the candy bar, I headed back inside the room. Gee was sitting on the bed, watching the news. I took off my shirt and sat next to him. He looked at my bare chest and grinned, "Teasing me, aren't you?"
I wasn't in the mood to smile, or have a witty comeback.
"Anything about the murder?" I replied.
Gee frowned. He sighed, "Nope. Patrick got rid of the body pretty well if you ask me."
Using my teeth, I tore off the top of the wrapper, "Oh yeah?" I spat out the ripped piece, "Are you just saying that because you think it's safe to go back?"
Gee shrugged, "I'm just saying he got rid of the evidence pretty well."
I rolled my eyes, "Sure you do." Maybe it's the voices, agitating me. Or maybe the pressure of getting caught by the police-or both. Either way it's making me change. Something dark inside me is getting triggered and I don't like it.
Gee looked at me, "Are you acting this way to get me turned on? Because it was cute before, but now it's scaring me." He kind of grinned, which meant he was only half joking.
I shook my head, "I wish it was an act."
Gee scringed his nose in thought, "You know, we never did get to kiss."
"We never get to do anything." I chuckled.
Gee smiled, "Now there's my Frankie."
'My Frankie' I smiled as his voice echoed in my head.
Gee stood up from the bed and walked towards the bathroom, "I'll be back." He shut the door behind him.
I can hear him lifting the creaking toilet seat.
I laid out on the bed and kicked off my shoes. And for a short while, my mind was off the murder, the running.
You know, you could always go back. Ray's voice was bouncing off my head's walls.
I scoffed, "Yeah, right. Give me one good reason."
Ray appeared lying beside me. He said, I have a ton. You'd end up in the mental hospital.
"Why would I want to go back?"
It isn't so bad anymore. Dr. Laguna is gone. He paused, And Patrick would be released once you say he didn't have anything to do with it. I mean, let's be real. As long as no one finds out about the murder, you and Gee won't go to prison...and the best part is, you get to stay with him. He added, Now, does that sound so bad?

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