You're Not In This Alone

I wake up from yet another bad dream, curled up in dad's arms. "You're ok baby" he whispers to me and I cling to his shirt, trying to regain my breath. "Where's pa?" I ask after a few minutes and he says "He had to go in to the gallery. I have to work today Rubes so do you wanna come with me?" I nod, definitely not wanting to be alone all day. "Alright go have a shower and get dressed and we'll go have breakfast on the way ok?" I nod and climb out of bed, stumbling into my room and grabbing some clean clothes before making my way into the bathroom. Once I'm done I redress and wander back out into the living room to find dad sitting on the couch watching the news. "Police are investigating a brutal shooting that took place last night in an alleyway just off 114th street, leaving one man dead and a woman injured. If anyone has any information regarding the shooting please contact detectives on..." The news headline briefly registers in my mind but I don't really care as dad switches off the tv and we leave the apartment, stopping at a diner and grabbing pancakes on the way to the store.

The morning goes slowly and just before lunch time two uniformed police men enter the store and ask to speak to dad. "Uh sure, Ruby can you watch the counter, I'll be right back I promise." I nod but when they leave to go out the back of the store I feel mild panic set in. I try to focus on breathing but it becomes harder and harder and when the bell over the door goes off I let out a small squeal, worried it will be Matt but it's pa and he runs across the store and cups my face in his hands. "Hey hey you're alright. Where's dad?" I'm just about to open my mouth when dad comes back out with the two police officers and they shake his hand before leaving. "Oh shit sorry baby are you ok?" He asks when he notices the state I'm in. "What's going on?" Pa asks and dad says "We'll talk about it later." Pa nods and guides me to sit down, sitting beside me and wrapping his arm around me. Twenty minutes later I get up and go out the back to use the bathroom and when I come back I overhear dad telling pa "Someone hunted him down and shot him last night, in non fatal areas and then left him to bleed to death." "Oh, well I can't say I have any sympathy..." "Tell me you didn't do it." "What? How the fuck could I have possibly done it? I was home with you all night." Dad sighs before saying "You didn't organise it did you?" "And how would I have done that?" Pa snaps and I walk back out into the front of the store, both of them going silent immediately. Pa stands up, smiling wide at me and I can tell it's a fake smile. "I gotta get back to work but I'll see you guys at home later" he says before pulling me into a hug. He walks over and kisses dad before pulling away and whispering what sounds like "We'll talk later" into his ear before he leaves the store. Dad stands there looking pale and I walk over and grab his hand. "Are you ok dad?" I ask and he nods before saying "Rubes sit down, there's something I need to tell you." I sit and dad sits too, turning his body to face me before saying "Matt was killed last night" and my stomach churns. I jump up and run out the back of the store, barely making it to the bathroom before I throw up, sinking to my knees as I lean over the toilet.. A strong warm hand rubs my back as dad softly says "Oh baby girl I'm sorry" and I after I heave again I push myself off the floor and into dad's arms, burying my face in his neck as he wraps his arms around my waist. "Are you alright?" He whispers in my ear and I take a few deep shaky breaths before shrugging, completely confused.

Later that night after dinner I go and lay in bed, the thought that someone killed Matt rattling around in my brain and I don't know how to feel about it. Part of me is upset that someone could do that but part of me is relieved that he couldn't possibly hurt me again. I toss and turn, but I can't get comfortable and my thoughts won't stop long enough for me to fall asleep so I drag myself up, hoping that a cup of herbal tea will help but as I approach the kitchen I hear something shatter before dad's voice snaps "You fucking did what?" "You heard me, I paid someone to do what you wouldn't. He got everything he deserves Frank, he fucking destroyed my little girl." "You can't just do that" dad hisses in a low voice, both of them obviously trying to keep from shouting and waking me. "Why not? He had it coming." "Babe this is fucking insane, I feel like I don't even know you anymore. How could you hire a fucking hit man to kill someone? Where did you even get the money? The man I married would never have even thought to do something like this, what the hell is happening to you?" My breath catches in my throat and I let out a small choked off whine, my head spinning violently and I see dad step out of the kitchen looking very upset right before I hit the floor and everything goes black.

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