I'll never let them hurt you, I promise

Frank~~
i was sat alone in the cold dark night for about another five minutes before a heard a faint voice in the distance calling me
"Frankie?" i turned my head only to see Gerard stood outside the cinema doors, he was alone which means the movie probably hadn't finished yet. thank god i don't think i could deal with Jaylin right now.
however if Jaylin's right, that Gerard really is going through a rough time then maybe i should leave him alone, maybe he's only using me to get through this hard time. what if i was just a one off fuck to him.
Gerard notices me staring but not replying and starts walking towards the bench where im sat, i quickly stand up and start walking away. honestly i don't want to talk to Gerard right now i want to go home and cry into my pillow and ignore the world.
"Frankie" his voice is louder this time, but weaker almost as if he's upset. i wave my hand as i continue to walk trying to wave him away. unfortunately he doesn't and starts running towards me. i feel the burn of new tears starting to rise and soon Gerard is walking close next to me.
"Frankie, what's wrong" i don't answer i only look up at him through my hair for a quick second to see his perfect hazel orbs staring down at me.
"oh god. Frankie have you been crying" i roll my eyes back down to look at the floor as i continue to walk. picking up some speed now. then suddenly after ignoring Gerard's question i feel his hand grabbing my arm tightly and spinning me on my heal so im facing him. i look up at his glare curtaining my eyes with my hair
"please tell me why?" he's whispering now, trying to make me feel comfortable, but i know the truth i know he doesn't really care i know he doesn't really want me. i ignore him again looking down at my shoes
"please don't give me the silent treatment" his voice brakes a little and im confused by the emotion shown in his words
"Frankie please, i love you" the words make my whole body cringe. now i know he's defiantly lying and with the lie still ringing in my ear drums i start running away. away from Gerard. away from the lies. away from everything.

my thighs start aching and my head pounding, my hearts beating rapidly and my breathing is heavy trying to successfully rope in as much of the thick air as i can. i ran all the way back home without stopping, without looking back, without saying a word.
im a few blocks away from my house, the lights are on and knowing my parents are up makes my chest pump that little bit faster. my mums going to go crazy with me, i haven't been home since yesterday she will probably tell me she was worried.
i decide not to go into the house just yet and i start to slowly stroll over to the abandoned park which is hiding round the back of some houses, i walk over to one of the swings and sit there for a moment before pulling out my cigarettes. i take one light it and begin to smoke it, swinging back and forth on the rusty metal swing. exhaling the dark smoke into the air trying and failing to do smoke rings by pouting my lips as i breath out. as i sit there staring off into the dark distance i wonder if Gerard really meant it, did he love me.
i think i love him, but Jaylins words, why would she say them if they weren't truth. yes she was harsh by tell me to back off however if my besfriend was going through a rough time maybe i wound be just as protective. i mean no one wants to see someone they love get hurt.
suddenly i feel a burning against my fingers and realise the cigarette has burned itself down, i throw it to the floor before regaining to my feet and beginning to drag myself home.

As soon as i step inside i regret it, im bombarded by my mothers body. she hugs me tightly and caringly almost lovingly however that is not the part i dread its the demanding questions which always come afterwards. she lets go of my body and steps back to look over me
"franklin where have you been" her voice is already in a pissed off tone however i don't want to reply i don't to tell her that i was at the most perfect boy's house fucking him. i don't want to tell her that i was having a great time until i was told he hard "dark secretes" i don't want her to know that im in love with someone i can not trust so i just stand there in silence once again. although i am always silent this time seems to anger my mother so much more
"franklin iero, i am your mother you will tell me where you have been the last two days"
i ignore her again
"frank" she says he eyes blood shot with anger "i don't know how you dare stroll into this house after spending the night god knows where, smelling like you've smoked 5 packets of cigarettes within an hour and looking like you've been dragged through a bush"
this time i'm the one who gets angry
"you know what "mother" i don't have to tell you where i've been, where i've slept or who ive been sleeping with or whose clothes im wearing. i don't have to tell you shit. you can fuck right off" i scream in her face before running up to my room and slamming the door extremely hard so the noise can be heard by the neighbours.
i throw myself onto the bed face first letting my face his the pillows and as soon as it does the tears begin to flow again. This time the crying is hard and soppy, taking my breath away and making breathing hard. i can hear my mother talking downstairs but after seeing no sign of my father i guess she's on the phone.
i try to calm myself and i sit up on the bed in the darkness of the room, i pull my knee's to my chest and sob into the grey sweats making them a darker colour of grey under my eye lids. although my mind is running wild with the thoughts of Jaylin's words or the fact that i have just verbally abused my mother the scent of Gerard on the sweats calms me down. i smile a little as i realise the only thing which can calm me more then smoking is Gerard. its a tragic discovery.
i sit there for about an hour just breathing in the sent of the boy i love not thinking about anything else other then his eyes, his hair, his skin, his touch, his everything
However i am rudely disturbed by my mother barging into my run, she turns on the light and i bury my head into my knee's not wanting her to see my red eyes or tear stained cheeks.
i hear her sigh and then her voice echo's throughout my room hearing the soul crushing news, the one single worst thing that i could have been told on this god awful day.

"Frankie honey, im really sorry but i rang Dr Parker, you re-start therapy Monday after school"

Notes

noooo Frankie, awww
i wonder what Gerard's secret is hummm
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