I'll never let them hurt you, I promise

Frank~~
i decide on not going home today as for one i don't need clean clothes because im wearing Gerard's and two i plainly cant be arsed with my mother today. i am happy, actually truly happy for once. i told Gerard everything, and he still accepts me, still wants to be my friend (although i would like to be more then fiends) but being friends for now is good and don't want my mothers shouting and arguing to ruin it.
Mikey suggested that we all should go out together today, me, him Gerard and Jaylin. i guess now i know Gerard and Jaylin are only friends it's cool if she comes along. Gerard did offer to go out just me and him, not a date, i don't think but. whatever. but i already said i'd hand with Mikey today and we couldn't leave Jaylin on here own so all of us are going to the cinema's.

When we get there two new movies are playing one is a chick flick which none of us not even Jaylin wants to watch so we go in to see this robot action movie thingy. honestly i don't find this sort of thing interesting so im just going along with what everyone else wants to do.
we get inside and sit in the order Mikey, me Gerard then Jaylin.
thank god im sat next to Gerard, i don't think i could have gone though the full hour and 40 minutes next to Jaylin.
About half way through the film i feel a tight warm grip on my hand, i look down at some fingers trying to get mine to lock in with them and when i follow the arm to the person it belongs to i see Gerard looking up at the movie screen. i know he's trying to play it cool but i cant help but giggle a little making him turn his head to look at me, his cheek instantly heat up and blush a little but i stretch my fingers out and let them lock with his making him feel a little more comfortable.
Although Gerard said he wanted to be my friend the holding my hand in the cinema's gives me mixed signals. i mean does he actually only want to be my friend or does he like me want something more. i mean i've really fallen for him plus he also said he was into me. god i just don't know where i stand with Gerard but i still will not reject his hand in mine.
After about 10 minutes our hands get uncomfortably sweaty but its quite funny how none of us are willing to let go. Gerard leans over to my ear and whispers
"i' going to the toilet Frankie, back in two" with that he gives me a cheeky wink then walks out the doors. i smile a little before going back to the movie. letting my mind wonder over the thoughts of Gerard remembering how sexy he looked last night but how cute and comforting he was this morning. he's just perfect.
However i am rudely interrupted from my thoughts when i feel Jaylin tugging on my arm to pull me closer to her, i look at her signalling me to come closer and im guessing she wants to whisper something to me. i look at mikey who is completely glued to the movie before leaning over Gerard's empty seat to let Jaylin say what seems so desperately important by the way she urgently signalling me closer.
"what?" i whisper, she hasn't even ever talked to me but now Gerard's gone she finds words to speak to me. although they are not the words i was expecting it.
"frank, i know you care for Gerard i can see it in your eyes. but you need to BACK THE FUCK OFF, he doesn't need you. we don't need you"
i look at her shocked before pulling her viciously back so i can speak
"Gerard told me that you weren't his girlfriend" i snap
"im not little frank however i am his best fucking friend and no one can take him away from me. not even you. he's going through a hard time the last thing he needs is a broken fag like you"
my heartbreaks as the words leave the normally innocent being. Jaylin doesn't normally speak never mind running her mouth like that.
i sit back upright in my seat not looking back at Jaylin once but i can guessed she has a wicked smile on her face. my mind starts running wild, repeating the new words
what does she mean by "he's going through a hard time" or more importantly "broken fag" fair enough i can see the broken part, i mean braking down crying because you see dead people means maybe i am a little broke but Jaylin doesn't know that. and fag i mean her bestfriend slept with me but she calls me a fag.
i am actually really upset and angered by the words and i don't even realise when Gerard comes and sits back down. he reaches down for my hand again but i tug mine away and shove it in the sweat pant pockets. i continue to look at the movie but i can feel Gerard's glare on me and i feel a sudden pressure falls down on my shoulders so i quickly jump up and run out the cinema.

Once outside i sit on a bench before running my hands over my arms where the goosebumps have already started forming. i reach down into one of the sweat pant pockets and grab my new pack of cigs i bought before coming here and my old lighter. i pick at the packaging before ripping it off and dropping it onto the floor. i feel my eyes beginning to pool with tear as i open the packet and shake one out, placing it in-between my trembling lips. i feel my legs start bouncing and i don't know if it's because im cold or because my body's trying really hard to keep my tears back. i lift my lighter and let the orange flame light the end of the cigarette. i put the lighter and the packet away before taking a long drag on the cigarette holding the toxic in my lungs for as long as possible before coughing it back up.
normally smoking it the best thing to calm me down however it doesn't seem to work and i soon feel the tears falling down my cheek. i let them roll down my face before falling off and into my lap as it's almost dark so no one will see me sat here pathetically crying to myself.
i smoke the first cigarette quickly before taking out another and lighting it up, i watch the sunset in the distance while i smoke the second deadly stick. i take out a third and light it up, pulling it up to my lips and taking a drag letting the voice inside my head whine on about how i will get cancer if i continue with this smoking habit. however feeing like this i wish cancer would come and kill me right now.
I am about half way through smoking my third cigarette when i hear a small weak voice close next to me
"i wish you wouldn't chain smoke Frankie" i'd know that voice anywhere, the voice that will probably still follow me once i die. i wish he would just leave me alone for once.
i don't even look in his direction
"josh for the last time stop tell me what to do"
i only hear a sigh as i finish the cigarette and throw it to the floor before stubbing it out with my shoe.
"Frankie" he starts but honestly i don't want to listen. i lift my hands and start wiping my damp face once im finished crying letting him continue.
"i know you really like this boy" i interrupt him rudely
"a lot" i only say it to annoy josh and make him jealous
"yes well," he carries on "i sense something bad about him Frankie" i tut at him before looking up at his face only to find a serious look on his face
"no Frankie im being honest, i feel like something's not right about him"
"your only jealous of him" i half shout while looking down at the floor
"of course im jealous Frankie, im jealous of anyone who gets you, im jealous of anyone you like more then me, but in all truthfulness im saying this as a fried, i don't trust this guy"
there's a small silence before he finally finishes
"he has dark secretes"
my tears start again, i don't know why but once again im sat in the almost dark night crying.
i turn my head to ask josh what he means but when i do he's gone. why does he always show up a the wrong times and then leave before i actually want him too.

i sit there for a while and i realise
1) i am in love with Gerard and
2) josh's "senses" are always normally right
can i trist Gerard?

Notes

god damn plot twists.
making Jaylin a bad guy is fun