Counting Down The Days To Go (Frerard)

I woke up a few hours later, the sun barely above the horizon. I turned my head a bit to see Frankie was still fast asleep, his head buried into my chest and his arms wrapped loosely around my back. I stroked his hair lightly and stared out the window. It was slightly windy, but only enough to make a few stray leaves on the street fly away. I suddenly felt the need to smoke. I sighed. I didn't want to wake Frankie and all his cuteness, but I forced myself to get up. I replaced my body in his arms with a pillow, hoping it wouldn't wake him. I grabbed my pack of Marlboro's and a lighter and shuffled downstairs. I softly shut the front door as I walked out onto our porch, not wanting to alarm my parents or Mikey. I slipped the roll of nicotine and tobacco between my teeth, cupping my hand around the end as I lit it. I inhaled deeply and sighed. I've been smoking less, on Lindsey's request, but it's pretty hard. Not like it really matters anymore if I smoke, I'm gonna die anyways. Ugh, I gotta stop reminding myself of that. I do it to make a joke of my illness but now that I think about how hard I've fallen for Frank, it upsets me. I really do love him, even if we've only been dating for as short a time as we have. I took another drag and attempted to blow it out in o's, giggling when I failed. I looked up, into the afternoon sky, flicking away a few strands of faded red hair that obscured my vision. In my daze of cloud gazing, I didn't hear the footsteps behind me, the soft giggle, and didn't realize at first what happened when the cigarette was slipped from my fingers. I turned my head to see Frank, a huge smile on his face as he took a drag. His eyeliner was smeared all around his eyes, making him look like a raccoon, and his bangs were messy and all over the place. It was cute. "Afternoon," he murmured when he handed the cigarette back to me.
"Afternoon, cutie." I smiled and ruffled up his hair even more. He leaned forward to kiss my cheek. "How's your tattoos doing?"
"They hurt. But that's normal."
"Guess that means no hickeys on your neck?" I asked jokingly. He chuckled and nodded before grabbing my hand.
"I'm tired."
"You just woke up from a nap."
"I know, but still." I let go of his hand and snaked my arm around his waist, pulling him closer to me. "Are you watching the clouds?"
"Yeah. But I can't make anything of them."
He pointed up. "That one looks like a heart!" he told me. I didn't see it, even after he explained, "The anatomical one, not the other one." I nodded anyways. He sat down on the steps, and I followed suit. "And that one looks like a sheep. And that one looks like..."

He was rambling on and on about which clouds looked like what, and god it was adorable. "Do you see it?" he asked, interrupting my thoughts of just leaning over and smashing our lips together.
"Uh, y-yeah," I stuttered. He giggled.
"I know you weren't." He craned his neck to kiss my cheek, blushing when he pulled away.
"You're being really cute today, what's up? Who died?"
"Nothing. I just get like this when I'm tired."
"Only when you're tired? Shame." He laughed and sat back, so his back was on the porch. He held his arms out like a child.
"Cuddle."
"On the porch?" He nodded. I smiled and swung a leg over so I was straddling his thighs. He wrapped his arms around my neck and pulled himself up so our chests were touching.
"Gerard," he started, "you know I love you, right?"
"Of course, Frankie. Why?" This is it, a voice in the back of my head nagged, he's breaking up with you.
"I just... wanted to make sure you know."
"Frankie, I-- I love you too. So much." Where was I going with this? "I just-- Sorry."
"No, no, keep going. If you want."
"I... God, I hate that we met in the circumstances I'm in. I want to be with you forever, like this." I sighed. "I love you so fucking much."
He didn't say anything for a minute.
"Frank, I'm sorry, that was--"
"No." He gripped my hair and smashed our lips together. It caught me off guard at first, but as soon as I realized what was happening I melted into it. I pushed into him, starting to tug at his lip ring. He deepened the kiss and slipped his tongue into my mouth. He pulled away after a minute, blushing even more. "I-I..." He chuckled. "I have no money for a ring."
"... was that a...?"
He shrugged. "I realize it's a bit early, but... whatever."
"Sure."
"Did you just answer to a fucking sort-of-proposal with 'sure'?" I nodded. He laughed before kissing me again, pulling away after a few seconds. "I'm sorry. We've known eachother for such... such a short time. This was a stupid idea. I--"
"My answer is yes."
He looked up at me, his eyes wide and his mouth making an 'o'. "Really?"
"Oh my god of course. I know we haven't known eachother for long, but I know that I really do love you. I don't care if I have cancer and that in a few months I'll be fucking dead, I love you." He smiled the widest I've ever seen. "And I don't need a ring. We've got our necklaces." He giggled and covered his blushing face with his hands.
"You responded with fucking 'sure'," he mumbled, his voice muffled by his hands.
"Love you, babe."
"I love you too, you fucking dork."

Notes

I DON'T LIKE THIS EITHER BUT I WAS BORED AND HAD NOTHING TO DO, SO...
does the fact most of it is dialogue annoy you guys?
and was the proposal thing stupid?
probably
i might delete this chapter later

xo