Drawn to you

Taking the blanket from the end of the bed, I wrap it around my shoulders, then go and retrieve my phone.
What’s going on with me? I never really go out and when I do, I end up making out with two guys and nearly sleeping with one of them. I like Aaron, I really do. He’s a good friend, fun to be around, and so loyal to me. Then there’s Gerard, who has really been nothing but a problem since the moment I met him. But somehow, he’s the one I almost end up sleeping with. Jesus.

Moving over to the couch, I pick the remote up off the coffee table and power on the television, flicking through the channels until I find something that isn’t an infomercial trying to sell me something.
Time ticks away as I wait for Gerard to return. I find myself fidgeting impatiently, constantly looking at the door and wondering if I should just go and find him. Eventually though, he bursts through the door, causing me to jump.
“Get dressed. I’ll take you home,” he says, handing me my now clean clothes. A deep sense of hurt fills my chest. “Is the idea of sleeping with me that bad?” I ask, pausing in doorway of the bathroom.
“No Franklin. Not at all,” he tells me, his voice calm, his gaze intense. “Just go and get dressed.”
“Then why did you stop?”
“Get dressed,” he repeats. I briefly consider getting dressed in front of him, just to see what he would do. But I don’t. Stepping through the doorway, I quickly remove his clothes and put my own dress, warm from the dryer, back on.
“Ready,” I say, my voice small and quiet as I emerge
He’s already standing by the door, holding my bag, his keys in his hand. The sight hurts my heart.
Following him out, I glance toward Aaron’s door. Feeling horribly guilty about everything that has happened tonight, as I make my way to gerard’s car and we start the short drive home.
“So um, what was the deal with you fighting? Is that something you always do?” I ask after a good five minutes of silence.
“Not always,” he states, focusing only on the road. I watch him as he drives, the lights of the streets flashing over his definite features as he traverses the street, not making an effort to further any sort of conversation with me until we arrive out the front of my house.
“Looks like someone’s waiting up for you,” he says, nodding toward the light coming from our lounge room window.
Glancing at the read out on his car radio, it’s 3am. My father isn’t going to be happy. I just hope that my mum kept her word and kept him calm.
“Well, goodbye,” I say, opening the car door. “And thanks.”
He just nods, keeping his eyes forward as he grips at the steering wheel, leaving me wonder what it is I’ve done wrong.
“I’ll see you around Franklin,” he says, meeting my eyes briefly, a tiny grin pulling at the corner of his mouth. “I’ll wait ’til you’re inside.”
Nodding, I shut the car door, and jog up to the entrance to my house. The moment I slide my key inside, the lock turns from the inside, and I’m face to face with my father.
“Who’s that? Is that Gerard?” he asks, looking over my shoulder.
“Yes. He gave me a lift home.” My father simply grunts his acceptance and nods toward the car. As I look over my shoulder, the rumble of the engine bursts into the atmosphere as Gerard drives away.

The next day is spent pretending I don’t have a hangover while I pack up my room, ready for the big move tomorrow. My father hasn’t said a word about how late I came home last night, so I think my mother must have worked some pretty amazing magic.
“Do you want me to just stack these boxes in the lounge room?” he asks, pointing at the packed books and personal items that I want to take with me. I don’t need furniture since the room already has some, but the guts of my room is coming with me.
“Yes please,” I say, as I shove a drawer’s worth of clothing into my suitcase. Once that’s full, I move on to putting the rest of my clothes into another box.
“This house is going to feel very empty as of tomorrow,” my mother comments as she brings over most of my hanging garments.
“Mum, I’m moving one train stop away. I’ll be back for dinner regularly,” I assure her.
“You’d better. Otherwise, I’ll send your father out to drag you back here.” Reaching out, she wraps her arms around me in a tight embrace.
“Mum?” I say over her shoulder, still hugging her. She hums in response, squeezing me a little tighter. “I know you’ll never change Craig’s room. But can you please reclaim mine? Turn it into a home gym or something."
“Sure I will,” she sniffles, so I know she’s started crying. “I might just knock down a wall and make a giant bathroom or massive wardrobe.” She pulls away from me and wipes at her eyes, putting on a brave face.
“I think that would be a great idea,” I smile, turning back to my packing. She’s joking of course. I’m sure that my room will forever be mine. But I want her to know that she’s free to change it if she likes.
Just as I start off the last box of stuff, my phone goes off from beside my bed, displaying an image of Aaron sitting on the grass at uni.
“Hey,” I say in greeting as I answer.
“Are you free? I wanted to know if we could talk.”
“Um… I’m kind of in the middle of…”
My mother starts to make frantic hand gestures as she whispers about leaving it with her. “Go, go” she yell-whispers, shooing me away with her hands.
“Actually, I’m free,” I tell him, smiling and nodding at my mum, trying to hold two conversations at once as she starts telling me that I’d better come home for dinner since it’s my last night and all. Grinning at her, I place my hand on her shoulder as if it will silence her. Sometimes I wonder who the child is between the both of us.
“Great. Would you like to meet somewhere or would you like to come over to my place?”
“I’ll come to you, I don’t have long,” I tell him, hanging up and promising my mum I’ll be back before six.
***
I arrive at Aaron’s at around four-thirty, ready to meet him for our ‘talk’. I have a pretty good idea what it’s about. I vaguely remember kissing him last night before I ended up outside with Gerard. So I’m assuming him wants to DTR. Personally, I find defining the relationship to be a bit of a waste of time. I mean, we’re at uni. We have our whole lives ahead of us still. As much as Aaron is a great friend of mine, I think I need to make it clear that anything that happens between us needs to be fairly light-hearted, especially after what happened with Gerard last night. I’m obviously not in the right headspace to be serious with him right now.
Besides that, I’m moving out of home for a chance to set my own rules and do my own thing. I don’t particularly want a steady boyfriend. I just want fun, so if he can agree to that, we’ll be just fine.
As I take the stairs up to the second floor, my eyes stray immediately to Gerard’s door. The six has swung down again, so I pause and reach up to press it back in place.
Once again, I can hear music from inside, and I hesitate about moving on. Perhaps I should just thank him? I mean, he did kind of save my arse last night... Feeling as though it’s the right thing to do, I bang on the door and wait. The music cuts out, and I hear shuffling on the other side.
“Put this on,” he says to someone inside. Realising he isn’t alone, I take a step back from the door, suddenly feeling silly for stopping by.
“What’s up?” he asks casually as he answers the door – once again shirtless. My eyes drag down his torso as I try to remember what it was I wanted to say.
“Don’t you ever wear a shirt?” I blurt out.
“It’s my apartment. I can walk around naked if I want,” he states.
“Who’s there Gerard?” a woman’s voice asks. I expect it to be that Bec girl again, but when she comes into view, it’s someone a bit older, and all she’s wearing is a sheet 'what the fuck'

Notes