Mine?Yours.Always?Forever.

Another day in this miserable life. Everyday is the same: get up, get dressed, pray to find love. Day in, day out. It will never change. I used to think that life is so pointless, so empty. Like a black hole, sucking you in more and more each day. I have come to realize that it is me that is pointless, me that is empty. One day soon, I will end this. Why not today? But first, I have a date with my cold friend, my beautiful razor blade. I push it into my skin, cutting left to right, 6 in total. Not stopping until the crimson liquid seeping through the cuts in my arm is enough to soothe my never ending pain. To think, someone could save me. Anybody. All I have ever wanted, all I have ever needed is someone to love, someone to want me. Is that too much to ask for?

I go to shower, the soap and water stinging my open cuts. I get out, throwing on a plain black shirt, a nirvana hoodie, super skinny black jeans and all black low leather converse. I try my best to fix the cherry red rats nest I call hair. I walked out of my house, being ignored by my brother (Mikey) and my parents. To them I'm just nothing, just some kid who lives in their house. As I walk through the hallways I expect the same thing as always: uncalled for glares from random jocks and sluts who have never even spoken a word to me. Being pushed around and called a 'fag' and 'emo piece of shit'. Lovely. No one actually knows I'm gay and I've barely even spoken to anyone in this school, I don't know why I've been targeted and labelled as gay. I stopped at my locker, but slowly turned around when I felt hot breath on the back of my neck, I saw Brendon Urie and Ryan Ross, my sworn enemies. The ones who have been tormenting me since 8th grade. "Heyy fag how ya doiiinnn" Ryan said, getting angry when I didn't answer him. Brendon started with the usual, a punch straight to the gut. I felt myself sink to the ground. Ryan did something new, repeatedly kicking me in the ribs, I think some of them are broken. I prepared myself to receive the final blow from Brendon, shocked when it never came. I looked up and my breath hitched in my throat. Holding back Brendon's hand was the most beautiful boy I have ever laid eyes on. He either had the darkest possible shade of brown/ black short hair, wide but thin lips, a medium sized nose,perfectly shaped eyebrows, he was short but it was actually really cute, he had the sharpest jawline I have ever seen (I mean really you could cut someone with that shit) and his eyes. Oh god his eyes. They were huge, light brown with little specks of darker brown and green sprinkled around his iris. I blushed a deep red when I realized I had been staring at him. I distantly heard him say "If I ever see you even look at him again I swear you will regret it". With that Brendon and Ryan scurried off, probably too scared of this new guy.
"Hey I'm Frank Iero, I'm new here."
I stared up at him, why was he talking to me? I'm an emo loser, everyone hates me, it's by force.
"G-gerard W-way" I managed to spit out. Wow dumbass, great first impression, he probably thinks you're some weirdo now.
"C'mon lets go to my house, you need to get cleaned up." He didn't even wait for me to reply, he just took my hand, pulled my me up and started walking, He realized he still had his hand on mine and quickly took it away, still blushing like mad all the same. While he had his hand on mine, I felt a small spark in my heart, I could've died right then. We started talking about things we're into, turns out we have a lot in common. We have more or less the same music taste, we're both 17 and we both like the same comic books. He does these little things that make me wonder about him. He plays with his sleeves and doesn't stop moving his hands, he hesitates before he speaks; as if he's scared he will say something wrong and someone will leave him. I can tell already that no one has ever really been there for him. I plan on changing that. He smiles a lot but if you look carefully into his eyes you will see months of sadness and years of never ending pain. He has spiraled into a deep depression and right now is at his worst. I want to help him, he just needs to let me in. He says it all started back in New York, having to change schools 3 times. He is now in Belleview High because the bullies were just too much for him. I don't know who would be stupid enough to mess with this boy,or why you would even want to, he is the definition of perfection. It turns out that all this confidence, standing up to Brendon and Ryan is just an act. A part he plays well. This boy is still a mystery to me, one that I hope to figure out one day. I think now I'll give my life a little longer, Frankie needs me. I will stay until he doesn't anymore, not a day more, not a day less.

Notes