The amount of pills I'm taking, counteracts the booze I'm drinking

It's only my third day in this hell but it feels like I've been here a life time. its so boring, there is nothing to do, no one to talk to, not even any music to listen to.
I already deeply hate his place plus Gerard is late again.
Why couldn't the hundreds of paracetamol's i had taken just of killed me, everything would be easier for everyone, i have nothing worth living for anyway, except maybe Gerard.

The first day in here was the hardest mainly because Gerard was the one who found me and brought me here, it officially became the worst day of my life when for one minute i regained consciousness and heard Gerard whispering "don't leave me, i love you" to me in the ambulance, it broke my heart which was the only part of me willing to survive.
He has always been an excellent brother but he wasn't there when i needed him the most, i guess the bullies won, i couldn't live with the torment and harassment i was getting every day, i didn't deserve it i did nothing wrong. Because of them, the bullies i had to listen to my own brother plead me not to die, it was that moment when i realised Gerard was a good enough reason to keep living, i loved my brother more then anything and i couldn't do such a horrible thing to him, i couldn't see him like that again.

The second day wasn't all that bad apart from Gerard being late to visiting times and only being able to stay for a sort while, then i was alone again. my bed is on a ward will about 8 other kids like me, all suffering from "depression" as doctor Green told me. Doctor Green came over to tell me he was keeping me in this shit hole for a few more days on "recovery" fuck. i don't want to stay here but they wont let me leave no matter how much a plead. i tried to convince them i was ok but the doctors here just don't listen. After Gerard and the doctor had left i was officially alone once again, bored. I was about to close my eyes and sleep but i was suddenly woken by the kid in the bed next to me, he hasn't woken up once since this morning and it was pretty late by now. He woke up and instantly started throwing black vomit up, I'm guessing they gave him a charcoal drink to get up what ever he had tried overdosing on.

I studied him while black liquid carried on to quickly leave his mouth, i felt sorry for the kid but couldn't help but stare over at him. he held the vomit bucket close to his chest and i instantly noticed the variation of old and new scars covering his arms, some were covered with plasters and bandages. as he finished throwing his guts up my eyes glared up at his face he has a small tear rolling down his cheek, he saw me looking and placed the bucket onto the floor. he looking up at me wiped his mouth and smiled before i heard his weak voice stutter "hey, I'm frank"

Then there was today, they woke me up at 8 am which is ridiculous when will they realise i don't want to eat their crappy hospital food, and i certainly don't want to be up this early on a morning. After breakfast i went back to my bed, sitting on the edge of it and waited for Gerard to visit me, to no surprise he was running late again. i wish he would hurry up though i want out, i don't like it here. When he does finally show up he walks over to me quickly with a huge smile on his face and he instantly hugs me tightly i obviously don't have the same happy smiley face as him. As he holds me in the hug i whisper into his ear "i hate it here Gerard" but i guess he already knew that by the look on my face however i still made him promise he would get me out soon.

Notes

Awwwww poor mikey and frank
it will get better i promise
next chapter probably up tomorrow