Psychosis

At first, I was taken aback by Frank’s question. How did he know that Bert had asked me to stop taking my medication? Almost immediately, I was reminded of the fact that the two had once been roommates.
“No,” I lied. “Why would he do that?”
“To make you more vulnerable.”
“But why?” I asked.
“Nevermind.”
When we turned out the lights that night, I couldn’t get comfortable. My conversation with Frank had been unsettling. It had opened my mind to so many questions, but I was left without any answers. I tossed and turned for hours on end. It couldn’t have been before six in the morning when I finally drifted off to sleep, only to be awakened within a few hours.
As usual, a nurse entered the room with our morning medications. This time, I followed Bert’s instructions, shoving the pill into my gums. The nurse checked my mouth and proceeded to administer medication to Frank. After the nurse left the room, I waited until Frank wasn’t looking to shove the pill under my mattress.
I followed Frank silently to the cafeteria. We trudged silently through the lunch line and to our seats. He didn’t lift his head to look at me a single time as we ate, and eventually, I grew bored with his indifference.
“You know what?” I said, standing up. “I’m going to sit with Bert.”
Bert grinned as I sat down next to him. Wrapping his arm around my shoulder, he mouthed the words “welcome back” and continued to eat. It took every ounce of my self-control not to steal a glance back toward Frank, who I knew must have been staring at me.
The lunch hour went by quickly and afterwards, Bert led me by the hand to the library. I followed him silently to an aisle in the back. There, he cornered me and shoved my back against the bookshelf behind me. He leaned forward until our foreheads touched. It was a feeling of pure ecstasy.
“Did you do as I told you, babe?”
I nodded.
“Good,” he said, smiling with satisfaction. “You’ll feel better soon. But, uh… I want to show you something.”
I followed Bert without question. In minutes, we arrived at his room. He ushered me in and told me to sit down. I did exactly as he asked, taking a seat on his bed. After closing the door behind him, Bert made his way over to the bed. He pressed my chest against his mattress and our fingers intertwined above my head. I felt weak but blissful as he pressed his lips to mine. Our kiss ended too soon, and he was already distracted by something new.
“Let’s make a pact,” he said, smiling wickedly.
Bert opened his palm to reveal what appeared to be a piece of broken glass. He lifted the piece of glass to his wrist and slid it across, leaving a trail of blood. As he handed the glass to me, I was hesitant to accept. I saw no real harm, so I obeyed his request, slicing the skin of my own wrist to match his. He crossed his arm over mine and our fingers intertwined. As we sat in silence, Bert leaned forward and, running his fingers through my hair with his free hand, pulled me in to another more passionate kiss.
After we both caught our breath, Bert smiled and said, “This is a pact that you belong to me, and I belong to you. So, say it with me. ‘I belong to you.’”
I belong to you.
It was as though Bert had taken over me. I didn’t have to say the words. They merely fell from my mouth.
“I belong to you.”
I soon left Bert’s room and made my way to my own, weary of the day’s events. When I arrived, I saw that Frank was not alone. My therapist, Dr. Cooper, stood over his bed with a look of concern. I soon realized her concern was directed at me, and fear began to take over me.
“Frank appears to be worried about you,” she began. Hearing his name, Frank bowed his head in embarrassment.
“He says you may be avoiding your medications and disposing of them privately. I’m not here to harm you, only to warn you that withdrawal from such crucial medication could prevent you from a full recovery and worsen some of your symptoms. I highly recommend you take your medications. We will be watching you more closely in the future.”
With that, the doctor left and I was alone with Frank. Luckily, I’d been able to hide my arm from Dr. Cooper, but it would be more difficult to keep my secret from Frank. He already sensed that I’d been hiding my pills. Rather than asking calmly why he ratted me out, I became angry.
“What’s your fucking problem? Do you insist on ruining my life?” I asked, enraged.
Frank acted as though he was innocent, his sad eyes always focused on me.
“I was just trying to help you,” he cried apologetically. “I’m worried about you… I’ve been where you are…”
“You know nothing of the life I live, Frank.”

Notes

Sorry for the lack of posts lately, I've been sick. Dx