Your eyes are vacant & stained (frerard)

FRANK'S P.O.V
I drove Gerard to school the next morning as he had almost-fully recovered from his illness and injuries.
“Today, we’ll go around your house, tomorrow, we go around mine for extra tutoring, alright?” I announced as we strode into class. The bell screamed, telling students it was the start of first lesson.
- - -
The final lesson was Spanish. I stood by Gerard’s desk, noiselessly, watching him.
“Hotel Bella Muerte,” Gerard spoke, swiftly, clearly and…Wow, his Spanish accent was exceedingly charming. Like, really…It was fricking sexy, man.
“Oh, hi.” Gerard glanced up, his cheeks going slightly red. “I haven’t got the hang of it, yet…”
“No, no, no.” I shook my head, disagreeing. “It’s fine… Your accent for it is…” I trailed off, not being able to find a suitable description. “Very…Good?” I scratched my forehead, awkwardly.
“You don’t have to lie, I know it’s not, it’s obvious you’re lying, sir,” Gerard poked my arm, laughing slightly.
“No, I’m not lying…In fact, ‘good’ is an understatement… I’ll just tell you this, if you want to chat up a guy, show him your Spanish accent.” I chewed my lip, hoping he wouldn’t react badly.
“What do you mean?” He cocked his head, a little. Why did he have to ask that?
“Basically…Your accent that you use when you speak Spanish is very…” I cleared my throat. “It’s very…Attractive, basically.” I muttered underneath my breath, hoping he wouldn’t hear.
But, of course, he did.
His cheeks went a dark velvet red colour, and he began staring at his papers.
“So…My voice isn’t ‘very attractive’ normally?” Gerard quirked an eyebrow, smirking shyly. It took him some balls to say that, clearly. I began to protest, then blew air upwards, heavily and collapsed on the desk next to him, feeling a little flustered.
“That’s inappropriate to say to your tutor,” I managed to gather the wits to say.
“And saying that my Spanish accent is ‘very attractive’ isn’t inappropriate to say to your student? I was asking you a simple question,” Gerard’s voice was small, and he looked extremely timid.
“And I was saying a simple statement…It was a compliment, take it or leave it,” I shrugged.
“Gracias, hombre atractivo (Thank you, attractive man).” Gerard purposely spoke in Spanish. And, I could easily translate what he said and it made my stomach do thousands and thousands of excited flips. I was forced to unbutton the top button of my black shirt due to the fact his voice…Urgh.
“And thank you,” I nodded.
“Le invitamos (You’re welcome).” Gerard replied.
“Stop speaking in Spanish,” I groaned, he knew I found it attractive, now he was just picking deliberately at my weaknesses. I don’t have a clue why he was doing it, probably just to make fun of me… Now that angered me, more than made me embarrassed.
“Lo siento mucho, señor (I’m so sorry, sir).” Gerard gave me a small smile. I knew he was uncertain to do this, however, he knew I wouldn’t get furious at him, as we were…Friends, I guess… I sighed, heavily, getting up from the desk.
“No me dejes (Don’t leave me).” Gerard whispered, quietly. “I will stop speaking Spanish, please…”
“Hey, Gerard, I was just getting up from that desk, I’m not going to leave you, stop worrying,” I clutched his hand, gently. “Don’t worry,”
His huge, hazel orbs searched my face then landed on my eyes. I was extremely tempted to just tell him to follow me then grab him by the wrists and kiss him, and show him…
“Sir?” Gerard waved a hand, comically in front of my face.
“Err, sorry… Just thinking about the guy I like,” I admitted, flopping in the desk next to him. There was a silence afterwards. “Speak to me in Spanish, as it is actually what the lesson is,”
“The lesson is ending, soon, anyway,” Gerard giggled at my dazed face.
“Oh, really? Make the most of it then, I’ll listen,” I grinned at him.
“Eres el mejor profesor nunca (You’re the best teacher ever).” Gerard glanced at the floor, his cheeks tinted pink.
“Gracias, eso significa mucho (Thank you, that means a lot).” I answered.
“Es el fin (It is the end).” Gerard gestured to the clock. I scrambled to my desk and I addressed the last one more time, then they left. Gerard and I went straight to his house; his parents weren’t even questioning why he wasn’t there late at night yesterday night. That pissed me off.
- - -
“Gerard,” Mikey strode into the room, again he glanced between me and him, and raised his eyebrows. “Where were you last night?”
Gerard remained silent.
“Where you at Mr Iero’s house?” Mikey chuckled.
“No,” Gerard replied. “I wish I was,”
“Huh?” Mikey’s eyebrows furrowed together.
“Don’t worry, Mikes…” Gerard forced a smile and Mikey shook his head then left.
“I’m just going to go and get ready for bed; I’ll be back in a little while! Make yourself comfortable,” Gerard patted his bed, and gave me an adorable smile, then left.
- - -
Gerard had been taking a while. I yawned, loudly, scanning around his room. My bladder sent a message to my brain, and I stood up, quietly going up the stairs, not wanting to disturb his parents who were debating with Gerard’s brother. I passed the kitchen and went up another floor, as the top floor (excluding the attic) was the only one with the toilet on, Gerard had told me previously. It was pretty dark, and I strode, mindlessly to the toilet then halted in front of the door…Oh, fuck. Gerard was standing there, showering, and washing the shampoo out of his hair, the soap running down his body. I felt as if I couldn’t breathe at the beautiful sight and… My jeans, of course, got extremely tighter. Fuck. I needed him. I wanted him. So much. His skin looked so soft… I had never been driven so much by lust. It was so so so wrong for a TUTOR to be staring at his STUDENT. I just couldn’t help it… I stood, staring in awe, mouth open. Gerard washed all of the shampoo out of his hair, humming a quiet tune. His eyes suddenly flashed from the body wash to me, and he squealed, a high-pitch scream, and grabbed the mossy green shower curtain, covering his body with it, his cheeks the darkest red yet. I, of course, had to act like I just saw him.
“I’m so sorry, I was just going to go to the toilet, I didn’t mean… I didn’t know, I’m sorry,” I repeated ‘sorry’ about 100 times, probably.
“No, it’s fine… I’m sorry you had to see that,” Gerard mumbled. “I’ll be out in a minute,” His cheeks were still red.
“I feel like a pervert now,” I mumbled out loud.
“You’re not…It’s not your fault,” Gerard bit his lip, nervously. “Sorry that’s probably going to scar you for life…In a bad way, of course,” Gerard giggled, nervously.
“No! Not in a bad way…” I trailed off, realising what I just said, my cheeks going hot.
“I…Thank you?” Gerard didn’t know what to say. “I-I… W-wait there, I-I’ll be out s-soon,” He had suddenly become more anxious than he has ever been, and retreating behind the curtain. I slumped down by the door. What had I done? Why couldn’t of I just gone back downstairs so he never knew that I had seen it? No, because I always think about myself and I just had to watch him…And now, I’ve messed it up completely and he probably thinks I’m a paedophile.
“Are you okay?” Gerard whispered. I glanced up from my hands to see Gerard with a fluffy white towel wrapped around his waist. The droplets of water dripped from his hair and down his chest, and then hid beneath the towel.
“Not really, I’m really…I feel so bad for walking in on you,” I told him. “I feel like a pervert,”
“Frank,” Gerard’s eyes softened, slightly, and I kept taking in the gorgeous sight of him, his hair wet and stuck to his perfectly-shaped face. “You’re not a pervert, seriously, stop it. You’re my tutor.”
I think I’d prefer to be a pervert than his tutor, I got to be honest. At least I could actually be allowed to date him… Not that he would say yes anyway. He likes another guy. Gerard sat next to me, still shirtless, just a towel to cover his lower body. I swallowed hard, the lust I feel for him was bold, right then.
“How are your bruises?” I attempted to stop myself from staring at his sexy body, however, it was impossible.
“I don’t know, I try not to look at myself too much,” Gerard admitted. I reached out a hand, and glanced at Gerard to see if he would protest, but he didn’t. I touched the bruises on his body, his skin soft, clean. I ran my fingers backwards and forth along his chest, my eyes not being able to move from it.
“Does it hurt?” I whispered, purposely in a husky voice… I couldn’t help myself, I’m in love with him, and what do you expect me to do, act normal?
“You said my Spanish accent was attractive, listen to yourself now,” Gerard mumbled, shrinking, almost lying on the floor in embarrassment. I smirked, slightly. Fuck yeah, success. I’ll have to use it more often. He doesn’t love me, though, I reminded myself. He just thought I was attractive, which was nice, I had to admit, but I wanted more of him… More than I could be allowed to have.
“Does it hurt, anyway?” I spoke normally, not wanting to come across like I wanted to impress him… I don’t want him finding out… Although it was getting more and more obvious, I knew it myself.
“A little, the big bruise,” He pointed to the one deep purple one just above his waistline. My eyes followed his hands and settled on the tempting spot. FRANK, STOP LOOKING! I tore my eyes away, biting my lip, slightly.
“Okay… Anyway, you better get changed, and I better go to the toilet,” I quickly escaped, closing the door behind me, breathing rapidly.
- - -
I strode downstairs and to Gerard’s basement, seeing him dressed in his pajama bottoms, but still shirtless. His hair was still damp, a little. He glanced up, and smiled at me.
“I trust you,” He blurted out.
“I trust you, too.” I grinned.
“No, seriously… You mean a lot to me… You haven’t left me like all my other tutors did because they thought I was too much to handle. You haven’t left me like all my other friends, excluding Bob and Ray, did, because they thought I was too weird for them to handle. That itself means a lot to me… You, mean a lot to me… You’ve saved me multiples of times… I…Thank you.” Gerard finished, he stood in front of me, standing on his tiptoes and placed a small, delicate, soft kiss on my cheek. I smiled, as he returned standing flat on his feet.
“It’s my pleasure… I wouldn’t leave you, I have promised you that I never will, and I won’t. I saved you because you needed saving, you don’t deserve to get beaten up. And, stop saying thank you, it’s really fine.” I watched Gerard as he laid on his bed, his hair scarcely wet and he switched on his box T.V., turning onto ‘Kerrang!’.
“I need to say thank you to you, though… I feel like if I don’t say thank you, it’s rude. Because, you do so much for me and I just stand there and get myself into trouble and put myself down,”
He gripped his silk pajama top from the bedside table and slipped it on, buttoning it up. I watched him, my lips parted as he did the last button.
“I must keep you awake a lot,” Gerard continued.
“It’s not rude if you don’t say thank you because I have told you not too. And you don’t get yourself into trouble! People are just idiots, trust me. You put yourself down because you can’t see the truth. You can’t see that you’re perfect, okay?” I breathed, heavily as I laid down next to him.
“I’m far from perfect, Frank,” His eyes studied me for a while.
“Gerard, believe me, you are perfect,” I leaned in slightly, and kissed the top of his head. “Trust me on this,”
“I won’t believe you, ever…It’s my problem,” Gerard leaned into me slightly, and nuzzled his head into my chest. “I’m sorry,”
“It’s not your fault… I will make you believe that you’re perfect… No matter how long it takes,” I whispered into his hair. Gerard placed a hand on my chest and played with the cloth of my shirt.
- - -
“Fucking hell, that was close,” I said, as quiet as possible as Gerard was asleep. I didn’t want him finding out my attraction for him. That would be the end of everything, the end of joy in my life basically.

Notes

a/n: i cry