Keep Me Safe from Myself

**Hannah POV**

I heard everything.

I tried my best to relax while Gerard and the rest of them talked everything out. I really didn’t feel like talking to bitch-face sitting in the corner.. even if she DID save my life. Gerard ran a hand through my hair, petting me almost like a cat. Not that I minded- I’ve always liked it since I was a little girl. My mother used to do it to me, before she died. It wasn’t a turn on or anything, it was calming. Relaxing. Totally not sexual…. Most of the time.

“Cherub: a winged angelic being who is considered to attend on the Abrahamic God in biblical tradition.”

It was Frank that had said it. Cherub? I’d learned about those in Mythology class a few years ago. Wait.. Blue hair had called me that, before attempting to end my life right then and there. I shifted my position slightly, trying not to give it away that I was eavesdropping. Why would she say that? Angels don’t exist, don’t be silly Hannah. I tried to comfort myself, the thought still itching in the back of my mind.

“My little Hannah.” Gerard spoke above me. It took all my willpower not to let a smirk form on my mouth.

“Because that’s what she believed, and what she still believes. Keep in mind that these sisters know nothing about what you know now."

Bob’s voice echoed in my mind. It can’t be real. Can it? No way. I refused to believe it. These guys were fucking insane.

I felt myself being lifted and I let myself fall limp in his arms. He carried me back to what I assumed was out bedroom. He placed me on the bed and walked out. I peeked an eye opened and saw his back turned away from me as he walked out. I frowned, upset he wouldn’t join me. Especially after all that was just said? I’m still confused as fuck! What the hell was going on? Screw tomorrow, I wanna know now.

I stood up and rubbed my eyes, brushing my hair to the side as I blinked away my sleepy state. I let out a yawn and ventured out into the hallway. To my surprise, the living room didn’t look like a tornado had run through it. The TV was playing some sort of comedy show, and Gerard was laughing along. I smiled, glad that he was enjoying the show.

I turned the corner, and his gaze lifted towards me. I had taken off the sweatpants I was wearing before, and all that was left was one of his black pull-over sweatshirts and a pair of pink lace panties that were just barely visible underneath it. His eyebrows raised at the sight of me, and he smirked.

“Like what you see?” I giggled. At least I had his attention.

“Definitely.” He looked beat, like he was going to pass out any moment.
His eyes were fluttering. Now I feel bad, I sighed. Here he is sleep deprived, and I’m trying to keep him up for selfish reasons. Besides, they did say tomorrow, right?

“Come to bed baby, I don’t want you to sleep on the couch.” He looked torn between me and the TV. Typical men.

“Fiiiiiiine.” He groaned, smiling at the ceiling. He fumbled with the remote and clicked it off. He held up his hands and gave looked at me with pleading eyes. I rolled my own and walked up to him, taking his hands and pulling him up off the couch. He didn’t hold any ground though, letting me take all his weight. Not that he was fat or anything, I just wasn’t prepared. I tried to take a step back but lost my balance and fell on my ass, Gerard on top of me. We both smiled and started laughing softly.

“Hi.” I giggled like a little schoolgirl, anxiety fluttering in my stomach like a thousand butterflies.

“Hi.” He whispered back, and leaned in, our faces inches from each other. I appreciated the moment we were having, and sighed lovingly.

Wait.

I took another deep breath, leaning a bit closer to his face. He puckered up his lips, obviously expecting something different. The smell of alcohol burned my nostrils, and I started to gag.

I shoved him off of me, and quickly scrambled to my feet, collecting myself. I could feel the tears threatening to pour from my eyes, but I didn’t care.

“Baby. Baby w-where you goinggggg?” There it was. The unmistakable slur. How did I not notice this sooner?

“You promised..” I fought back the tears, but I was crushed. I felt betrayed.

I ran to my room and grabbed my phone, a sharpie, and my old school satchel. I dumped out the contents, watching old papers and pencils scatter all over the floor. I threw on the sweatpants from before, tying the string loosely around my waist. I tosses a camisole tank top in my bag and walked to the kitchen with haste, throwing the five Mountain Dew that sat on the refrigerator shelf into it. I grabbed a package of Oreos and tossed that in there too. I didn’t know where I was going, and I didn’t care. I just wanted to get out of here. Call me overdramatic, but drastic steps needed to be taken. I refused to be hurt again. I’d seen Gerard when he was drunk, at least when he was with Zack, and trust me, it wasn’t pretty.

I took a quick peek into the living room and saw Gerard had passed out on the floor where we’d fallen. My anger boiled over and I ran back to the kitchen. I grabbed a sticky note that laid on the table with a list of groceries started on the front. I tore it off and uncapped my sharpie.

‘Call me when you’re sober’. The fresh note read. I tore it off and walked back over to him, and stuck it on his forehead.

I took one last look at him, grabbed my bag, and walked out the door with no idea where I was headed.

Notes

I'm so sorry about not updating! Updates may be like this now that I have a new story I'm working on, Sorry guys <3 I still love you.

Comment, Rate, Subscribe, Criticize. You know what to do~

Xoxo
-Hazel