How the misery begins

I waited outside the quaint coffee shop, my hands shivering violently-partly from the cold, partly from the nerves. I shoved them deep into my pockets, hoping they would stop shaking enough for me to seem even remotely normal; because right now I looked as if I were on drugs. After five minutes (still no sign of Lindsay), I decided it was much too cold to stand outside freezing my ass off waiting for her.

I walked into the coffee shop, the small bell ringing as the door opened. I received a bright smile from Sophia, the elderly woman who owned the place, as soon as she saw me. I've been here enough times since we moved into our house for her to recognise me instantly. We often had small conversations-she'd tell me stories about her past, and she'd always talk about her grand kids, Lucy and Stephan, as if they were the most wonderful peo
ple in the entire world. I mostly just sat and listened, marvelling at the way she was able to talk so passionately about the things she loved, but there have been more than a few occasions where she'd asked me about myself. At first I didn't say much-just basic things, like where I go to school and what my hobbies are-but the more I got to know her, the more I opened up. She's one of the few people I can trust. If ever I'm in a shitty mood, I come here. Sophia always manages to make me feel a little better.

"Hey Gerard, what's got you so frowny, huh?" She asked as I slid into a booth in the corner of the room, her thick southern accent clearly audible.
"well, I'm about to break up with my girlfriend, so I imagine that's why." Despite my harsh tone, Sophia placed her hand on my shoulder and gave me a small, sympathetic smile. "Honey, if you feel like you gotta break up with her, and you got an actual reason for it, then break up with her. I'm sure it's not that you don't care about her, but you just don't feel like it's working out anymore, I'm sure she'll understand."
I looked up an her, and patted the hand that was still on my shoulder "thanks, Sophie." "No problem, hon." She ruffled my hair and walked away, back to serving the few other customers sat in the small, cozy shop.
After getting up and ordering some coffee at the counter, I sat back down in the booth and waited. I began to play with the fraying edges of the battered, old leather seat I was sat rather uncomfortably on.

I heard the bell above the door ring and snapped my head up. Sure enough, I saw the familiar head of raven hair hair bouncing through the door. She spotted me, gave an illuminating smile, and made her way over to me.
Sure, I love Lindsay, but not the way I love Frank. With Frank, I feel warm inside; like I'll never be alone again for as long as I live. But with Lindsay, I sorta just feel comfortable. That's probably the reason I haven't broken up with her sooner, because I felt safe. I guess, in a way, she was kind of like a safety blanket; it seems comforting after a traumatic event, but in reality, it didn't do anything but momentarily block out the cold.

Two skinny arms wrapped themselves around my neck, and a pair of soft lips were pressed to my cheek.

I sat still.

"What's wrong, baby?" Concern filled her voice and I felt a sudden pang of guilt in my chest. "Uhm, we kinda need to talk" I said, trying to hide the fact that I wanted to cry. I don't do well in these situations.
"Okay, but first I wanna tell you all about my vacation. I doesn't feel like I was gone for a month, I feel like I saw you just yesterday..." she began to ramble on about her trip to Australia as I sat there, desperately trying to work out what I was going to say. I was about to rip my hair out when I finally couldn't take any more.
"...and we went scuba diving and bungee jumping and then we went on this huge shopping spree and I got so much stuff it was great-"

"Lindsay, I'm breaking up with you."

Notes

OMG ITS BEEN SO FREAKING LONG SINCE I UPDATED.
I haven't really got any excuses, I just didn't know what to write. This is probably also gonna be gerards last pov for a little while. I might do another one soon, but it'll most likely just be frank from now on.

anyway, I hope you like it, tell me what you think and if you have any ideas let me know and I'll try and fit them into the next chapter.

comment/rate/subscribe or whatever
bye xox