Frankie's Suicide (Frerard)

I wake up at 6 with thoughts of Gee. I should apologize for being so rude last night. God, I’m an idiot. After what we did, I just shunned him. He probably thinks I hate him. I get out of bed and quietly walk to his room, so the night nurses don’t see me. I gently knock on his door.
“Come in” he responds immediately.
I walk into his room and find him sitting on the edge of his bed, staring at the ceiling.
“Gerard?” His head snaps down and his eyes meet mine. He looks angry but hes… smiling. Its unsettling.
“Gee have you slept?” I ask cautiously
“I cant. I’m not allowed.” He explained slowly
“What? What do you mean? Of course youre allowed to sleep” I say while walking towards him. What the hell was he talking about?
“I’m not allowed” he repeats again
I kneel down in front of him and he follows me with his eyes, his creepy smile gone.
“Gerard what’s going on?”
His eyes soften and he is about to tell me something before his head snaps up again and he’s staring at something behind me. I turn around but theres nothing there. He looks so afraid, fear in his eyes.
“Gerard?” I ask desperate for an answer. He says nothing, still staring at nothing.
“You need to go” He says urgently, still not meeting my gaze
“Gee, you’re scaring me”
He makes eye contact with me and for a brief second, he looks so… I don’t know, concerned about me, before he stands up and returns to staring at nothing.
“Frank, go” he says in a shaky voice
“Fine” I say while standing up, my concern replaced by frustration, “I came here to apologize but I guess I’ll just leave”
I’m standing right in front of him but his eyes are glassy and he’s not seeing me. He’s probably not even listening.
I wait for a moment, waiting for him to say something. Nothing. He just keeps staring past me. I let out a frustrated sigh before I turn around and leave.
What the fuck was that?


Its happening again. I can feel it in my chest. My hearts racing and its not from my anxiety. I can feel the headache coming on. My hands are shaking. I need a hit. I only ever did it every couple of weeks and never really thought much of it. This has happened before though. The withdrawals. Fucking hell, how the hell am I gonna get coke in a mental hospital. I’m walking towards my room, the corridor walls feel like theyre closing in on me. I gotta get to my room.
I need that high. I need to be able to stop thinking. It makes me stop thinking, and that’s pretty much what happiness feels like, right?

Notes

Title credit - Honey This Mirror Isn't Big Enough For The Two Of Us

This a hella short filler chapter bc i havent had time to write because of TAFE. Its not even really a filler chapter. idk. enjoy.
Please comment, let me know what you think, maybe leave suggestions as for where you want this story to go.

March on MCRmy <4