Frankie's Suicide (Frerard)

8:52pm. A nurse gave me sleeping medications. A few of them actually. 5 to be exact. Meds are given at 8:30 and I dont want to be awake any more. My head feels like its full of useless worries and concerns. I cant stop thinking. I cant stop thinking about school or my parents, or my worthless existence but most of all I cant stop thinking about Gerard. I can't get him out of my head, his beautiful face keeps popping up in my mind. Why is this happening to me? I want to get to know him. I wonder what hes in here for. He's probably a psycho. He's got to have something wrong with him, why else would he be in here? I keep going over his words in my head. Just thinking about the way he said "Frankie" give me butterflies. Only a few more hours until I can see him at breakfast.

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My eyes open to a nurse shaking my shoulder.
"It's quarter to 9 love, you'll miss breakfast"
Oh shit. Gerard. He wouldn't have waited for me. Oh god, I blew it. My one chance to make a friend and i fucked it up.
I stumble out of bed past the nurse, and towards the cafeteria. Still in my pajamas, I rub my eyes and comb my black hair with my fingers as i make my way to the cafeteria.
He's there. He's sitting with some people by the window. Like he said he would. I let a grin take over my face as I stare at him.
I get some toast and head over to Gerards table. He notices me walking towards him and waves at me. As I approach, Gerard welcomes me and invites me to sit down across from him. He is joined by a small, skinny girl with black roots at the base of her long, lilac hair. Besdie her is a man with a sizable afro and big lips. He looks too cheerful to be in this place and across from him is another man who looks like he would kill anyone if they said anything wrong to him. His head down and shoulders hunched over his breakfast.
"Guys, this is Frank" Gerard began, "Frank, this is Jamie, Ray and Bob"
Ray gave me a huge smile and Bob barley even glanced at me, too focused on his food.
"Hi Frank" Jamie said
"Hi" I mumbled
"Uh, well I hate to say it but group starts in, like, 10 minutes so we we're heading off but we'll catch you up there Frank" Jamie said with a polite smile as she got up, followed by Ray and Bob.
"I'll see you guys up there" Gerard said while not breaking eye contact with me.
I watched them head towards the stairs and Gerard interrupted my thoughts by saying "What really brings you to St. Thomas, Frankie?" He said it so non-nonchalantly that it threw me off. His elbows resting of the table and chin in his hand.
"I-ah... I tried to kill myself?" God, I'm an idiot. Why did I make it sound like a question?
"Do you want to talk about it?" He asked, concerned. Wow. Its like he actually cares about me.
"No, not really" I said while nibbling on my toast
"I remember my first day in this place. I knew no one which made it so much harder to get through. I was shy, like you are. But once you open up to people in here, Frankie, you'll realize you've probably got a lot in common with us than you think"
Most of these people are insane, no way I'm like them. I didnt know what to say. So I stared. I stared into his hazely brown eyes while he pushed his food around on his plate. I dont know what it is about him, he's just so... he just looks like a good person. If there is even such a thing.
After what seemed like an eternity, he said "We should get going. Don't want to be late for group therapy." and with that, he stood up, taking both mine and his own food tray and dumping them on a nearby trolley.
"Shall we?" He asked while motioning for me to make my way up the stairs. I just smiled and made my way up the stairs. While we were walking up the stairs, I turned around to tell him I didn't exactly know where I was going, and I swear he was staring at my ass. In the split second it took for him to realize I was looking at him, he adjusted his gaze to meet my face and went ever so slightly pink in the face.
"Yeah?" was all he said
"I don't know where to go" I said shyly
"I'll show you" he said with a sexy smirk on his face.

Notes

Chapters are probably gonna be about this short from now on :/
Its too difficult to write longer ones, sorry
Hopefully I'll be posting more often from now on

March on, MCRmy <4