The World Is Ugly But Your Beautiful To Me

We walked over to the car and got in. while Gerard checked his phone I thought about what had just happened. Why did we have a vision? What happens if it comes true? I honestly wouldn’t mind if it happened in real life, fuck it felt it was happening in real life!

All of a sudden Bring Me The Horizon blasted through the car speakers.

‘SHIT!’ Gerard screamed over the loud music. I started laughing at Gerard’s frustration while he pushed about 10 buttons at the same time, trying to stop the music.

When he finally turned it off he turned to face me and laughed as smiled at him.

‘Aww I love that song!’ what the fuck Roxy? No emotional attachment! Build a wall. Build a wall.

‘Your cute when you laugh, you know’ when I saw Gerard’s expression on his face it looked as if he didn’t mean to say that out loud.

I smiled shyly and turned away. I saw in the reflection of my window, Gerard dragging his hand down his face.

He was adorable when he was frustrated or embarrassed.

Ugh! No! Bad Roxy! Bad, bad Roxy! Remember the rules! 
Don’t fall for anyone. They will break your heart 
Build walls to protect yourself from everyone 
Don’t try to make friends, you WILL lose them 
Just get through life and die happy 
Do not trust ANYONE

I have been living off these rules for at least 4 years. And so far I have succeeded and I am not ruining that now.

Most of the drive to school was silent, apart from green day playing lightly in the background. Gerard tried to make some small talk but I mostly nodded or said yes or no. I think he got the impression that he said something wrong because he looked confused.

We eventually got to school, and just in time. We were running a bit late because of the vision and the speaker trouble.

We drove into the parking lot of Belleville high school. The school was big-ish and I was extremely nervous.

‘Welcome to hell sugar’ Gerard turned round to face me and gave me a weak smile.

I started to hyperventilate. Oh shit. Not today, please. Damm you anxiety. This can’t be happening.

‘Oh, shit! Roxy are you okay?’ Gerard started to panic as I started crying.

‘Ugh, the school isn’t hell, it really nice! Please stop crying I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you’ Gerard looked very worried as he started to realise maybe I wasn’t upset but frightened.

‘I-its n-not your f-fault g-Gerard’ I needed air, badly.

I was just about to pass out when I felt strong arms hold me in a warm hug.

‘Shh sugar, everything will be okay your safe’ Gerard kissed my forehead as I sat in his arms. The feeling of being in Gerard's arms was magical, I felt safe. I didn’t even know Gerard but right now all I wanted was him.

‘I-I’m sorry’ I croaked out as I sat up, out of Gerard’s arms.

‘No sweat sugar, what happened?’ Every time Gerard called me sugar my heat melted. He was so kind to me, a stranger.

‘E-emm I have anxiety and my old school was hell so I panicked…I’m sorry Gerard I really am’ I started to cry all over again.

‘Aww that’s okay Roxy, why are you sorry?’ it sounded confused and I couldn’t understand why.

‘I’m wasting your time? With the vision, this! Basically everything. You don’t have to take me to school anymore, I will get the bus’ I stepped out of the car and started to walk towards the school. In a matter of seconds Gerard was walking beside me.

‘You weren’t wasting my time and I highly recommend you DON’T take the school bus because that is hell in the form of a giant yellow dildo! Oh wait I mean bus, yea….bus’ he laughed and I couldn’t help but smile.

‘Hey! That’s it! Smile, I know this sounds terrible because it’s your first day but do you want to ditch? You really don’t look like you’re ready for school’ he looked at me with a hopeful expression on his face

‘Okay’ this is going to because interesting

Notes

IT WORKED! yay my computer wouldn't let me update, but here it is!! enjoy kiddies xxxxx ugh this is shit isn't it? ugh oml