The Only Hope For Me Is You

I've been sitting on my porch for at least an hour at this point, the rain has stopped and the sky is turning that orangey red color it usually does as the sun begins to rise.

My pants are moist from sitting on the wet wood porch for such a long time.
But it doesn't matter.

I haven't showered.
But it doesn't matter.

My hair smells like shit.
But it doesn't matter.

My feet are soaked and frozen from the mixture of cold and rain.
But it doesn't matter.

I'll never be able to get the smell of rain out of these clothes.
But it doesn't matter.

The only thing that matters is Gerard.

"Hello? Sir!" I'm pulled out of my trance by an authoritative voice,

"Huh?" I glance up at the police officer that was towering over me as I sat on my porch.

"I said, does Mr.Way have any family that should be informed about his current condition?" Instead of answering his question, I observe his uniform. His name tag catches my eye,

S.P. Monroe. What does S.P. Stand for?

"Mr. Iero I know you're having trouble focusing right now, but I really need you to work with me here. Does Mr. Way have any family members that should be notified about his current condition?" I force my self to listen to this Monroe guy,

"Uh, his brother Michael. Can I please just go see Gerard now? He really needs me."

He needs me? Or do I need him?

"Sir, I'm sorry but I'm going to need Mitchell's number before you can go anywhere."

"Michael" I say irritatedly, "anyway my phone's dead and I don't know his number by heart. Please just bring me to Gerard? I'm the closest thing he has to family as of right now, please I'm begging you!" I plead on the verge of tears again. S.P. Monroe tilts his head up and takes a breath while putting his hands on his hips.

"Okay look I usually never do this, but since your a total reck right now," offensive.. "I'll help you out." He looks around him and grabs my shoulder.

"Come on kid, I'll bring you to Gerald."

"Gerard. And thank you so much you have no idea how much this means to me."

"Don't mention it, let's just get a move on okay?" I nod furiously as he leads me to the police car. I open the passenger side and hop in once I hear the door unlock.

"Look, the only reason I'm doing this is because I know what it's like to have a friend ripped out of your arms only to be placed on the doorstep of Death, like some kind of fucked up meat delivery."

I watch the trees fly past me in a greenish brown blur as we speed to the hospital, blowing past red lights.

"I don't want you to feel what I felt when my friend left me. I didn't even get to tell him how much I appreciated him."

Listening to him thoughtfully, I can see the hospital in the distance.

"It was a terrible experience, knowing that you've spent more than half of your life with this person and you weren't even able to properly thank them for always being there."

I turn to S.P. Monroe for the first time since we got into the car. He rubs his eyes feverishly with the palm of right hand, keeping his left firmly planted on the steering wheel.

"I'm sorry." I say at a loss of words, feeling genuinely sorry for his experiences.

"His name was Vincent. He was a good guy. Sometimes I swear I could hear him laughing right along with me whenever I watch a real crappy horror movie."

He stops at a red light, a block away from the hospital. The first one he's stopped at since we began our journey.

"We used to do that all the time you know. Watch crappy horror movies. We would always be doubled over in laughter, laughing until our sides hurt at the terrible graphics."

The light turns green and ends our trip by smoothly pulling into a parking spot in front of the hospital.

"I guess what I'm trying to say is I see a little bit of me and Vincent in you and.." His voice trails off.

"Gerard.."

"Yeah Gerard. Sorry"

"It's okay."

"Go. Go and make sure your friendship doesn't end the same way mine did." I nod and hastily get out of the car. Before leaving I turn and signal for him to roll the window down.

"Yeah kiddo?"

"Your friendship didn't end. He's still with you, I know he is." S.P. Monroe smiles at me, his tear stained cheeks raising to help reveal wrinkles on the corners of his eyes.

"Get in there man. I'll be waiting to bring you home."

"Thanks." I pat the roof of the car twice as I turn to face the hospital. Looking up and taking in the massive size of the building.

He could be anywhere. Top floor? Bottom floor? Hell? Heaven?

Taking a deep breath, I step toward the main entrance and the automatic doors part ways for me to see my best friend. Either his entire person, or just a cold body.

Notes

Another chapter coming up today or tomorrow!