The bridge was much higher when I expected from up here. Well I guess that my extra 5'3 made somewhat of a difference. I was standing on the edge, one hand holding onto the railing and the other handing lifelessly by my side.

Inhale.

Exhale.

Jump.

The water hit me like a concrete wall of ice. Th shock and impact spreading through my chest causing me to stop breathing. Fuck, if I can feel the pain then I'm not dead. Fuck fuck fuck. I had hoped I would land on one of the submerged rocks, however I must have missed them. The bridge itself was not high enough for me to die from just jumping off, I did not want to drown, just die from impact and the result of inertia enforcing the rules of physics on my internal organs. (Inertia: things inside you keep moving inside of you even if you have stopped, brain will get squished, heart unable to pump, massive internal bleeding; quick death)

I swam over to the edge, intending to climb out and try again but I heard the sound of a phone going off. Not wanting to be found, I scrabbled over to my pile of whatever it could be called and tried to hide within them so I would not be seen. Gosh it was cold. I could almost fee the icy water penetrating my skin, clawing into my skin, trying to freeze my very core.

It was so painful, I decided to give up fighting the cold and just let it wash over me. It was not the death I had planned but the cold will knock me unconscious before I actually die so that was of some comfort as I let out a tiny whimper of submitting. Submitting to the pain and the cold and the world of the living.

Gerard:

I span around to find the source of the sound; it was the boy from earlier. Smothered in wet rags. His skin looked somehow whiter and dead looking. His lips had turned blue and his breathing was shallow. Why was his hair wet? I could just about make out a trail of damp from the river to where he was curled up. What on earth was he doing in the river? It's the coldest night of the year so far?

I knew that if I left him here that he would surely die, he looked out of it already. I doubt he had insurance and so the hospital was not an option. Well, it's only my first night here, I could claim ignorance about taking in homeless people. He breathing became very slow, I knew this was a danger sign so I picked him up bridal style and carried him back. I'm not the strongest person, but god he was tiny and my flat wasn't very far.

Juggling a lifeless body and my keys, I opened the door and began to run the shower. Praying that there was hot water, I sat him in. His blankets, I put to one side and started to remove his sodden, and freezing cold clothes. He would easily fit into some of mine. I sat with him in the shower, squeezing half in the door, until some colour returned to his skin and he was warmish to touch. While waiting for him to warm up, I took in his appearance. His milky skin littered all over with inky markings, two swallows on his protruding hips and (my favourite) a scorpion on his neck, reaching down towards his collarbone.

His breathing retuned to normal but he was still out, deep. I found a towel and started to dry him off the best I could with the crappy towels I had. From the floor by my bed I found a faded smashing pumpkins t-shirt and some clean looking boxers. I dressed him and put him in my bed, tucking him into the duvet to try to keep him warm while he slept.

I wasn't particularly tired anyway so I made some coffee and decide to just read some comic books until he woke up and then we could decide what t do with him.

He looked so peaceful as he slept, it was very difficult to fight the urge to get in with him and have him snuggle up to me. It's been a long time science I had another person in my bed.

Notes

I actually love, and I mean love, each and every one of you who has read this :) you're all fabulous and I wish to give you all hugs!!

MRxx