Maybe They'll Leave You Alone But Not Me

We slowly made our way to the door, our hands closed in one another’s. Gerard’s face was tense, but still contained traces of sadness. As we reached the door, sounds of mourners filled our ears. It reminded me of my parents funeral. Be strong for him Irina. We quietly made our way through the people to the main parlor were the casket was open. Beside the casket were a set of double doors that led to the chapel were the service would be held. In the doorway stood Mikey, and beside him, a couple that resembled Mikey and Gerard. The woman was leaning on the man as the man shook people’s hands and thanked them for coming. Gerard stopped abruptly, jerking me close to his side.

“Gerard?” I said.

“That’s my parents. The people who kicked me out. I can’t.”

“Gerard..” Mikey noticed us and was making his way to us.

“Gerard, you came. Hello Irina.” I nodded in his direction.

“Of course I came.”

“Will you sit with us?” Mikey asked hopefully.

Gerard sighed and shook his head slowly. “You know I can’t.”

“They’ll see you’ve changed! That you’ve turned your life around!”

“Mikey, enough. I’ll be in the back. I’ll be at the graveside, but I have to leave after that. You can come to my house after if you want, but I can’t be around them.” Mikey nodded his head and went back to the Way parents.

“Irina, shall we?”

“Okay.” I whispered. We walked over to the casket and beheld her face one last time. Helena was beautifully dressed in a simple white gown with a black sash. Her pale skin only complimented her ruby painted lips. She looked as if she were merely sleeping in evening finery, rather than in death. Gerard was quiet, but when I looked over, tears were steadily streaming down his face. I rubbed his back and pulled his head to me. We moved on quietly. Gerard pulled us into a dark corner to gather himself.

“I’ll be okay in just a moment.”

“Take all the time you need.”

We hid for a long time. Eventually, the service music started up and we quietly slipped in the back. The service was beautiful; we laughed at stories friends went up and told and cried at the musical dedications. Gerard sobbed into my shoulder most of the time. Finally, the service closed and headed to the graveside. The procession consisted of six men walking the casket to a spot under a willow tree. The Way family sat in front of the casket as a priest spoke in Latin over her. They lowered her into the ground and it was over. People dispersed until only the Way family and Gerard and I remained. Gerard, with a few stray tears, watched from a few graves away. I stood by his side silently, until we turned to leave.

“GERARD. IS THAT YOU?” a man’s voice yelled from behind us.

“Irina, I need you to stay right here. Don’t move.”

“Okay?” I watched as he moved towards the family. Mikey shrank behind the family. I could see the father making gestures at Gerard. Gerard calmly took it all, but I could see the fight building in his posture. Eventually, he broke, yelling back at the man. He turned around, storming towards me. He grabbed me by my hand and kept walking. I struggled to keep up but just as we reached the gate I heard the Way father yell “HE’LL MESS YOU UP TO GIRL. MARK MY WORDS.”

Gerard just kept walking, dragging me behind him. When we got to the car, he hit the hood before sliding down the side and sobbing uncontrollably.

“Gerard! Gerard, what the hell happened?”

“The restaurant was left to me. She left that for me. But everything else is theirs. But what does it matter? He says I’ll just sell it off for drugs and alcohol. But he’s wrong. I’m not the same person. I’m not..” He broke, crying harder than he ever had before.

“Gerard, you’ve never had a drink since I was around. You don’t even smoke cigarettes. Whoever you were before me, he doesn’t exist. Now, come on. I’ll drive. That’s it. In the car.” I led him to the car and put him in his seat. I drove home quickly, and pulled Gerard from the car. I led him to his room and undressed him down to his boxers. He slipped between the covers and cried. I held his head in my lap and petted his hair. I comforted him as he had done me. We stayed in the dark for hours. He cried until he fell asleep. I left him to go shower off today’s makeup and hair product. Clean and dressed, I went to Gerard’s room and curled beside him under the covers. He woke up and smiled at me. Red rings lined his eyes, but he was smiling. I smiled back at him. He drug me close and kissed me softly, building tension the longer our lips were together.

“Thank you,” He whispered.

“I love you, Gerard.”

“I love you more, Irina.”With that, we snuggled close and went to sleep.

Notes

Intense chapter. Expect some short, but cute chapters to follow. Tell me if you guys like it or not. I tried to recreate the funeral scene I see in my head. Thank you some much for following my progress up until this point. I am so happy that you have supported me! Remember:

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<3 Later Killjoys