Wounded Secrets

I woke up with a start as the door opened and shut loudly. I instantly backed up as far away from the door I could get while still staying on the bed and under the covers. I heard whoever it was, hoping it was dad, climb over the suitcases we had left at the door and make their way to my bed. I felt myself begin to tremble at the thought of some crazed fan getting in or just a plain stranger. But that was impossible, no one else had a key.

"Bandit?" I heard an all too familiar voice speak up. my breathing hitched and I froze. I didn't move a muscle. "Look, I'm, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have-"

"P-Please go." I trembled. I felt the bed dip where he sat down and I pulled my knees to my chest.

"No, look, Bandit. We need to talk. I know you are unbelievably mad at me, which reason, and I just need to say sorry. Properly, so if you could just come out of the blankets for one second." He said, most likely watching to see my next move.

"If I do, you'll leave?" I asked hesitantly after a long silence.

"Yes."

I crawled out from beneath the covers and looked up at Frank. His eyes were the only thing that gave away his crying as they were a little red and puffy. I looked at him and waited for my apology, still sitting on the idea of forgiving him.

"Look Bandit, I know I'm a huge douche and that I messed up big time. The reasoning behind me and Gerard's, um, yeah, was because I thought you were voluntarily having sex with Ray. I never thought he would do something like that. So, I thought since you were with Ray I would be with Gerard. I know, I'm fucking stupid and childish, but if you could please just forgive me?" He rushed out, looking up at me hopefully. I looked away from him and down at my feet.

"Frank, I just don't know. I mean, if you really loved me, how were you even able to touch my dad?" I pointed out as I picked the nailpolish off my toes.

"Look, I do love you. So fucking much. And I know I'm stupid for even looking at your father after all the shit I put you two through, I'm sorry. I really am." He looked down, hoping that I wouldn't see the tear run down his face. Even if I hadn't seen that particular tear I had heard how his voice strained in the effort to keep back the tear.

"Okay, Frank. I forgive you. But I'm serious, I'm done with this bullshit with my dad. Please, can we just try to be happy?" I looked up at him hopefully.

"Thank you." He said, looking back up at me. I crawled over the sheets and wrapped my arms around him. We hugged like this for what seemed like just a few minutes, but must have been hours. I pulled away and planned on wiping away his tears when I saw they had dried over the duration if our hug. I smiled at him before it slowly faded as I remembered Ray.

"I think I should go on the bus and talk to Ray now." I said as I slumped back onto my butt and held me hands in my lap.

"Are you sure? I don't think it's such a good idea." He asked, concern filling his body.

"I have to do it eventually." I said.

"But-" I cut him off by standing up off the bed and walking towards the hotel door. Before I knew it he had gripped my shoulders and forced me into looking up at him. "But I just don't think you should go. It's a little too soon."

I just stared into his eyes as I stood in the stiff position the grip on my shoulders kept me in. My hands at my sides and good posture. I smiled, thinking that I must look like a tin soldier or something before Frank caught me out of my mind by crashing his lips onto mine. I closed my previously wide eyes and kissed back.

Unlike most of the kisses we shared before that were just a clashing of teeth and spit, this one was real and meaningful. It wasn't needy or forced and I felt like if I could just live like this for the rest of my life, I would. I smiled into the kiss at just the thought and Frank pulled away, giggling. I giggled with him before pecking his lips and slipping out of his grip.

"If you come with me, I think I'll be alright." I smiled, hoping he would agree to come with me. He sighed and pretended to be annoyed, crossing his arms and tapping his foot before grabbing the key off of the counter near the door. We exited the room and he stuffed the key in his pocket before picking me up and throwing me over his shoulder. I laughed but I was still too tired to put up a fight so I just rolled with it.

Notes

I know. This is so fucking slow right now. I'm sorry! Forgive meeee!


I am too emotional to write, but wanted to give you this fragment, because I got May Death Never Stop You on Saturday. The fucking one year anniversary. I just can't. Sorry. Anyways, love you.