Did You Come To Stare Or Wash Away The Blood?
The Hardest Part Of This Is Leaving You
Title from Cancer by My Chemical Romance
Chapter 1-The Hardest Part Of This Is Leaving You
I slammed the door behind me and stormed down the driveway. I hated them and never wanted to go back to that hell house, no one was going to make me go back there, they would have to kill me first! I know that sounds a bit dramatic but that's what I was thinking at the time. Listening to LeATHERMOUTH as I walked around the corner, hiding what I thought was my home; I looked back on what had led me to this. What made me who I was? Who other people didn't want me to be.
Mum, that word seemed so foreign to me. My mother died in a car crash when I was five; so I don't remember much about her. I remember what she used to tell me about my father though, she said he was smart and talented but never would accept it when people told him that. He was shy but he still managed to get his point across. She always said I reminded her of him, that I looked like him. My brown hair, tall frame and hazel eyes were not all that unique so I guess she meant my personality. According to the paramedics my mother’s last words were 'Elena, the hardest part of this is leaving you’. I used to think that they just made that up, but not anymore. Not now that I know the truth, those words mean everything to me.
After she died I had no one to look after me, my mum didn't have any living relatives who were willing to look after me and no one knew who my father was. I was dropped into the system and thrown into the first orphanage they found and left me there. I guess it wasn't that bad but not the place for a 5 year old girl who was scared of everything. Yes, I was scared of everything, I mean everything. The dark, needles, spiders, water, cars - everything. The only thing that would calm me down was a song that my mother sang to me. It was called, Early Sunsets Over Monroevile. It was from a little known American band at the time called My Chemical Romance. My Chemical Romance is a pretty big band now; they've won music awards for Tre's sake! But at that point they were not that we'll known outside of the New Jersey underground scene.
My Chemical Romance saved my life. How many times have you heard that? I've heard it way too many times but I understand it. Their music inspires you to keep on living. My Chemical Romance didn't save my life, the started my life. Without them I wouldn't be who I was, I could be dead, I could be one of those happy preppy girls you see, I could be the biggest slag there is. But I wouldn't be who I am now. I wouldn't be the antisocial kid who reads books and plays bass. I wouldn't be the girl who still grieves over losing her mother 9 years ago and whose preferred instrument is normally one of the most ignored.
I came back from my daydream and noticed I was sitting in an alleyway with my bass in my arms. A tear had begun to run down my pale face. I quickly rubbed it away before my eyeliner started to run. I pulled my hood over my head and walked towards the city. The next few days were going to be hard, but I was going to make it through. Nothing would take me back to those people I thought were my family. I was going to live, and I was going to do it my way...
Chapter 1-The Hardest Part Of This Is Leaving You
I slammed the door behind me and stormed down the driveway. I hated them and never wanted to go back to that hell house, no one was going to make me go back there, they would have to kill me first! I know that sounds a bit dramatic but that's what I was thinking at the time. Listening to LeATHERMOUTH as I walked around the corner, hiding what I thought was my home; I looked back on what had led me to this. What made me who I was? Who other people didn't want me to be.
Mum, that word seemed so foreign to me. My mother died in a car crash when I was five; so I don't remember much about her. I remember what she used to tell me about my father though, she said he was smart and talented but never would accept it when people told him that. He was shy but he still managed to get his point across. She always said I reminded her of him, that I looked like him. My brown hair, tall frame and hazel eyes were not all that unique so I guess she meant my personality. According to the paramedics my mother’s last words were 'Elena, the hardest part of this is leaving you’. I used to think that they just made that up, but not anymore. Not now that I know the truth, those words mean everything to me.
After she died I had no one to look after me, my mum didn't have any living relatives who were willing to look after me and no one knew who my father was. I was dropped into the system and thrown into the first orphanage they found and left me there. I guess it wasn't that bad but not the place for a 5 year old girl who was scared of everything. Yes, I was scared of everything, I mean everything. The dark, needles, spiders, water, cars - everything. The only thing that would calm me down was a song that my mother sang to me. It was called, Early Sunsets Over Monroevile. It was from a little known American band at the time called My Chemical Romance. My Chemical Romance is a pretty big band now; they've won music awards for Tre's sake! But at that point they were not that we'll known outside of the New Jersey underground scene.
My Chemical Romance saved my life. How many times have you heard that? I've heard it way too many times but I understand it. Their music inspires you to keep on living. My Chemical Romance didn't save my life, the started my life. Without them I wouldn't be who I was, I could be dead, I could be one of those happy preppy girls you see, I could be the biggest slag there is. But I wouldn't be who I am now. I wouldn't be the antisocial kid who reads books and plays bass. I wouldn't be the girl who still grieves over losing her mother 9 years ago and whose preferred instrument is normally one of the most ignored.
I came back from my daydream and noticed I was sitting in an alleyway with my bass in my arms. A tear had begun to run down my pale face. I quickly rubbed it away before my eyeliner started to run. I pulled my hood over my head and walked towards the city. The next few days were going to be hard, but I was going to make it through. Nothing would take me back to those people I thought were my family. I was going to live, and I was going to do it my way...
