I Don't Want To Be In Love

Walking down the damp sidewalk I feel the bass radiating from the walls of the club I'm about to enter. I bought these tickets for our four year anniversary. A Violent Femmes covered band that we both agreed where amazing and always saw when they did shows near by. Instead of dancing with the man who I thought I would be loving for the rest of my life; dressed in a skin tight black sequin dress and dark green pumps that where intended to drive you crazy, I face my first time in a long time alone. Ready to get shit-faced and dance my ass off, because I know how much you hate to fucking dance. I go back in my memories, replacing every single image of the life and love we shared with that scene you so perfectly constructed. Completely naked on our newly bought dark red vintage couch screwing your best friend. Fucking Michael , I always thought he was a beautiful man and so are you. I just can't believe I was that stupid to not see it before, because now that's all I see when you try and call or text.

The Line of already growing with drunk women and men wrap around the side of the building, I can feel the beginnings of a light rain hit my faux leather jacket, the cold night air is a welcomed contrast to the humid mugginess of the poorly ventilated building I'm about to enter. I hide in the hugeness of the city and tonight I am no one.

The bouncer ushers me in along side a petite brunette girl and her hipster boyfriend, they turn the corner and he glances back at me winking. This is where I want to be, a place where love is abandoned and nothing matters. I walk down a narrow orange pleather hallway covered in torn band posters and clouded with cigarette smoke. Keeping in mind that the women's restroom is the first left; I hand my jacket to the coatroom attendant giving her a ten and getting a ticket that I tucked into my bra thankful for benefits of a not so petite figure. I mean I'm still thin, but I'm grown into myself over the years, filled out in ways that I have come to appreciate.

Quickening my pace as I hear the opening band begin to play I hurry down the stair into the lower half of the remodeled movie house, damn I love this place. I go strait to the bar and order two shots of tequila, this dress gets me quick service and I will be taking full advantage of that tonight. The amber liquid goes down like fire waking me up and warming me up from the inside out. The one thing about this city that I love is the rad music scene, Iocal and incoming bands know their shit here and I can appreciate that. This spot has become a second home to me. A place where I have kept to myself for years, for times when I need to disappear. After four more shots I start to feel a familiar buzz drift over me, at this point I have no say in what acts follow.

looking across the room taking in the scene of hot moving bodies and the purple red lights hitting drenching musicians. I make my way to a support beam on the other side of the dark room. Hearing nothing but guitar and drums I lean on the square beam enjoying the feeling of the room and feeling the music with my whole body, I love nights like this and right now the gin and tonic in my hand is perfection. I finish the last of it and set it on the small table next to be. At this point I hadn't noticed until my hand graced his thigh, but someone who I couldn't quite make out was standing next to me looking at the stage. With longish red hair and pale white skin he easily stood several inches taller then my 5' 5' inch height and the smirk on his face shows how my wandering hands had not gone unnoticed. I've never been good at the whole self control thing when drinking, and with no one here to focus on I have no idea what I will get myself into. Looking ahead I begin to feel comfortably hot in the humid room, taking a piece of ice i absent mindedly begin to suck on dripping piece of ice. Don't get me wrong this band is fine, but I came here to hear the main act and I'm not quite ready to leave this spot. I feel this stranger lean closer to me and my body goes electric as he whispers in my ear. Feeling his breath on my neck my mind is rendered useless as he reaches across me leaving little space between him and me.

"Do you mind...."

He reaches into my almost liquid glass and takes out the remaining ice cube sticking it in his own mouth but staying close. gripping on to the beam that I was now pinned up against, it is taking everything in me to stay standing and he knew it. I turned my head looking into his eyes, I couldn't make out their color but something in the way he was looking at me made me realize that this is exactly what I came here for.

Him.

His voice was smooth and playful; I could tell right away that he wasn't from around here, maybe from somewhere on the east coast.
"Are you here alone sugar?"

"y-Yes."

I have never been much for words, but the way his hand is now touching my exposed thigh, tracing vertical lines where the beginning of my only tattoo begins with his finger tips, is making it increasingly difficult for me to formulate sentences let alone whole words.
"That's not safe, someone might take advantage of you..." He said making his east cost accent thick and causing a chill to run up my back. Fuck I needed this.
"That was the point." I say licking my lower lip and carefully closing off the small space between us pressing my body up to his. He pushes me back up against the wall causing me to gasp.

"Well in that case, I'm Gerard and by the end of tonight Darlin', I have a feeling I will become very familiar with how that name will sound."
His fingers slowly move upward and taking my hand in his, he leads me now breathless to the front of the dance floor where the stage started. The opening act had walked off stage and the musicians for the cover band The Violet Femmes had set up their instruments checking each mic, the crowed was going wild and my adrenaline was on an exquisite high with Gerard standing next to me. The lead singer walks up to the microphone.

"Thank you for coming out tonight! We would like to begin our set tonight with something a little different. A good friend of mine and fellow musician Gerard Way is in town tonight and he has agreed to open our set with Add It Up!"

Notes

This has been stuck in my head all day and I needed to write it down. I want to hear him sing this song so bad my bones hurt.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MLuWFl8tio8

Check it out and let me know if this isn't complete crap.
-Alba