Im tired of this shit. I dont like it. Just fucking take my life already! If he wanted me dead than why didn’t he kill me from the start? Who brought the evil back into my life? After the light finally saved me from it. Just please...

“Frankie? You okay?”

“Y-Yeah...Im..uh..fine.”

I stalked into the kitchen for a water. At least I can drown my insides but not for long. I felt a pair of arms wrap around my middle. I turned and was facing a concerned Gerard. I honestly dont want to bring up the passed couple days with a bastard with no heart or feeling. Carelessly playing with me like im some sort of toy. Feeding me only fucking chocolates that had the weirdest taste to them. To find out it was controlling me. My feelings... I just..cant. Any more. A hand was lifted to my face whipping away a tear that had escaped.

“Its okay Frankie. Everything will be just find.”

“No it wont.” I mumbled out into his chest. These fucking tears. I hate crying. I hate for people to see me cry. Only Rylee can see that, not Gerard. He might not like me anymore if I cry all the time. Great now I can feel another wave of tears coming. I felt Gerard rub my back soothingly trying to calm me down. I hope he never leaves me.

“Hey guys I just got off the phone with the-.....Sorry never mind.” Mikey walked back rubbing the back of his neck into the living room.

“No its fine. Whats the matter?” I say trying to act calm. Mikey walked back in a rush. “Okay well the police say that they will be here in about an hour.” He paused and looked at me. “To ask you some questions about...Trevor....and maybe your...parents.”

The last thing I want to do is talk about my parents. I nodded my head to Mikey and he walked back in the living room plopping down next to Ray. Gerard gave me a little squeeze of comfort before we started heading for the couch. I looked over to Bob and Rylee who were cuddled up on the couch sleeping away and Ray and Mikey were holding hands whispering to each other. Than I looked back at Gee who was looking out into space. This was a good chance for me to actually see what he looks like in detail today.

His red hair was ruffled a bit as if he just woke up. He had on a grey loose hoodie with his tight ripped black skinny jeans. He looked kinda like sex but also having a boyish look to him. His skin was somewhat pale and his eyes were a bit puffy red same goes for his pixie nose. He might have been crying the whole time I was gone. If only I was there to comfort him. Im such a terrible boyfriend. I leaned in close to him to whisper.

“Im sorry Gee.” I must have snapped him out of his gaze. He turned his head running his hand through it and just looked at me for a second with his glossy hazel eyes.

“What for?”

“Because I was gone. I left and I didn’t even know it. Its all my fault that Trevor took me away. Leaving...you...to be in pain...”

I held my head down staring at the floor as one tear fell down my face. Gee just sat there staring at me. Looking at how pitiful and how terrible I am at being a boyfriend. I honestly dont want to break into Niagara falls but as I just kept thinking about what Gee might have been feeling while I was gone made me depressed.

Two whole minutes. Of the tears falling and Gee not doing anything to stop them. I guess this is what I get for not being there for him. I felt a hand rest on my back and feel the couch shift as Gee finally moved closer to me. I looked up with my teary eyes at Gee who looked like he was trying to hold back his tears. Pulled me into his chest and we laid there on the couch trying to get as close as possible to each other.

“When you left. I felt my heart tear out of my chest. I never felt so alone in my life when he took you away from me. Now your back. And you brought my heart with you.....Its fixed. I never felt so alive...Frankie.” His words. Running through my head with guilt, sorrow and forgiveness.

“I...I love you.”

“I love you too, Gee. Ill never leave you again. Okay?” He kissed the top of my forehead. Our focus was on the t.v now. With the sound of the quite t.v going on and me resting my head on Gerard's chest listening to his heart beat slowly let me drift into sleep. Something I have been wanting for the past week.

---

I woke up in a white room my eyes slowly opening listening to the whispers. As I was getting up it felt as if something was really heavy on my back. It felt like it weighed a ton crushing all the bones and muscles holding me down. The light of the white room was somewhat bright but as I looked around there was a tall dark figure standing above me. I was laying against the wall trying to catch myself from falling as the dark figure walked forward. Every step that it took it sounded like thunder was rumbling beneath the ground. The whispering started to get louder as the figure got closer to me. They were saying 'Frank!' 'Die you piece of shit!' 'Help me!' over and over again. Than the room started spinning. The figure go down to my ear and whispered.

'Trevor. Kills. Gerard. The. Savior'

Than it kissed my ear back away from the side of me to come face to face with me. That face started morphing. First it was my fathers than Trevors than Gerard than it was nothing. Nothing was on its face.

---

I started screaming as I woke up. Screaming and crying. Scaring everyone around me. Gerard jumped and sat up next to me rubbing my back as I was crying. I could feel everyones eyes on me as they woke up from my scream of terror. But why did I scream? Im not scared. Gerard started whispering sweet things to calm me down as my tears were running down my pale face.

'Knock Knock Knock!'

“That must be them. Gerard why dont you take Frank to the bathroom to calm down a bit. Ill just let the police in and make them some coffee, okay?” Mikey said as he stretched out and got up from underneath Ray.

Gerard kissed my neck and we walked into the bathroom to calm myself.

Notes

Frank's bad memories and dreams. I feel so bad now. Damn it! Now hes gotta talk to the police about everything and the blood from the window and than his totally bad nightmare. Damn. And he wants to fucking kill himself. Shit. Im such a bad person!!! Now he sees Trevor and his dad in his dream. I swear Frank will go crazy by the end of this.


Title Credit: Alesana 'The Best Laid Plans Of Mice and Marionettes'. I really love this song by them. Its so good it actually really fits this whole story to me or at least this chapter and the past 3 chapters.