Gerard's POV

All my senses, my instinct, my feelings are stimulated. Maybe too stimulated. So stimulated that I completely forgot about a plan.
I don't make any sense. I was too overwhelmed by the power of the instant to actually make my brain do its job. And, again, too overwhelmed.
I figure out how I'm thinking, how ideas run so fast through my brain, how much I'm nearly hyperventilating by the too big amount of emotions.
Honestly, I feel like my body is going to endure something, is preparing itself, but the mixture of these two feelings generates something like... Excitement?
I feel my brain projecting my future inconsciously. The uncanny thing is, it should scare me, but...
I'm not. At all.
My brain takes it like a challenge. Which is completely stupid.
It is a stupid challenge.
I mean, I'm here, in Bordeaux, in a completely different decor. I've visibly tried to change who I was, I've like, risen from my ashes.
The constant question is replaying in my head: Why am I reacting this way?
Then, my depressive side gains the upper hand: Why my life decided to change this much, at my 18th birthday? Why couldn't I just live normally, with normal events as fixed as a straight line? Why did I have a scrawl instead?
I'm still not making any sense.
I should stop thinking. At least, stop overthinking.
No more thoughts.
Shhhh.
Nada.

I'm still lost anyway. How should I react?

Shhhhhh.
Nothingness in my head.

Should I show myself?
Make something? Is there anything I can do, anyway, considering the situation?

SHHHHHHH. QUIET.

Oh God, I think I'm growing insane.

---

Remember this. In a situation of crisis, the best solution remains to do things that are useful. That's the only thing to do.

I'm going to keep doing the promise to Shams. For the moment, what is better than remaining an Art teacher and pretending nothing happened?

Notes

I didn't tell you explictly what really happened on purpose :) Try and guess what it is, the comment section below is always working ;)
Hope you enjoyed it, as usual comment/rate/subscribe and have a nice day or rest of the day