The Only Hope For Me Is You

Everything at school was going perfectly. I actually started looking forward to going to school everyday because of my friends. It had only a month but I was already starting to trust the guys. Gerard and I have been flirting ever since that night in my basement. The morning after that night he sat by me at lunch and just looked at me the whole time. He was being so sweet. Buying me band t-shirts, taking me to Starbucks (which was a sure way for him to get laid), he even did my homework all week. I was really starting to like him. We hung out at my house a few nights ago and he met my mom, she is in love with him. Things were really starting to be okay again. I was laying in bed watching Frankenstein, another one of my favorite movies, and my phone started to vibrate on my bed side table. It was Gerard.

Hey Frankie :) mind if I come over for a little bit? I have something I want to talk to you about.

I read the text and got a little worried. I responded quickly saying yes of course. I wonder what he had to talk to me about. Was it serious? Was something wrong with him or one of the guys. I began to panic. I was on the verge of tears when my mother walked into my room with bowl of popcorn mixed with M&M's. When I was little and me, my father, and mom would watch movies together in the living room we'd always eat popcorn and M&M's. It's one of the fondest memories I have of my father. My mom saw the frightened look on my face and made her way over to my bed sitting herself next to me.

"Fank, honey, what's wrong sweetheart?" She said studying my face.
"Gerard just texted me and said that he wanted to talk to me about something." I said. I knew it didn't sound like that big of a deal but it could have been something bad, really bad. I was so afraid that I already screwed shit up with him. He was too good for me. He didn't want me anymore. So many things were going through my head when Gerard pushed my door open and greeted my mother and I with a smile but as soon as he saw the tears streaming down my cheeks he made his way to my bed and took a seat beside me.

"I'm going to leave you two to talk. I'll be upstairs if either of you need me." My mother stated while exiting my room, closing the door behind her.
"What's wrong Frankie?" Gerard spoke after we heard my mother's footsteps going upstairs.
"I fucked it up and you want someone else. I already know it. You don't have to say a word." I told him, tears falling from my eyes.
"Frank how could you ever think that? I know we've only been talking for a few weeks but I really like you. I actually came over here to ask you out. I want to be yours Frankie and I want you to be mine." He said it so lovingly he made it hard to remember that just two nights ago we were smoking and talking about murder. I mean he was so bad but so sweet at the same time. Is that even possible?
"Gerard I was so scared that you didn't like me like I like you." I told him with a sense of worry in my voice.
"I'm going to make sure you never feel like that again." He said pushing his soft lips against mine.
"Trust me." He said pulling away.

That night Gerard took me out. First we went to Starbucks and although I insisted I buy my own, he bought me a caramel mocha. Then he took me to a movie. I think we went to an old cinema and watched Dawn of The Dead. I want sure because I was way to busy watching him the whole time. Things were actually looking up until the next day.

Gerard picked me up for school with all the guys in the car other than Ryan and Brendon who I guessed were together and were also going to be late like everyday because they lose track of time while their sucking on each others faces. We were in our spot in the parking lot when a very familiar car pulled up. No. No. This couldn't be happening. This was a dream. I couldn't believe it. He got out of the car and I could already feel an anxiety attack coming on. I was about to start crying when he made his way over to the guys and I.

"Frank." He said so coldly.
"What are you doing here Kellin?" I spit back choking back tears.
"Oh, you didn't hear? I transferred here baby. Now you're stuck with me. You didn't honestly think I wouldn't find out about you coming back to school did you? You of all people should know that when I want something I won't take no for an answer." He said with a hateful grin.
"Just leave Kellin. Don't talk to me or my friends. Just don't!" I said tears now streaming down my face.
"Who is he Frankie?" Gerard said looking over at me. I really wish he wouldn't have called me that..
"Oh so you just let anyone call you Frankie? I knew you were a whore." Kellin yelled.
"Frank what is going on?" Gerard asked putting his arm around my stomach. I was about to throw up. Kellin walked away with a giggle and left me shaking in Gerard's arms.

I didn't make it through first period without throwing up so Gerard took me home. He ditched school with me and stayed at my house. I fell asleep as soon as he laid me down on my bed but when I woke up he was laying on his side looking at me.

"You're so cute when you're asleep." He said smiling at me. "Now are you going to tell me about what happened today with that kid?" He asked curiously.

I didn't want to tell him who Kellin was or what happened between he and I in the past but I felt that if I didn't then I would lose him. I was beginning to find that Gerard was the only thing that has made me happy in a very long time and I didn't want to jeopardize losing that, so despite my best efforts, I told him everything.

I looed up at him and noticed he was already looking me in the eyes, I began "His name was Kellin. We met four years ago at the mall. I was walking around and he followed me into the elevator and at first I thought he was extremely creepy butt he was really good looking. It was just me and him in the elevator and he told me that I was the most beautiful person he's ever seen. Of course I said thank you and I was going to leave it at that but he asked me how old I was and when I said I was twelve he lost interest a little. Because he was thirteen and all. Well he asked me for my number after we got off of the elevator and we were best friends for two years. Well one night I was staying the night at his house, like I always did, and he kissed me. It wasn't that weird because I knew we were both gay but it was a little odd because I never thought of Kellin like that. After that we started dating. We were dating until last year actually.." I began to feel my face flush and the tears began running down my face.

"Frankie, baby, you have to tell me the rest or I won't know what to do to this asshole." Gerard said wiping a tear from my face.

"Well, um.." I began again "We were at this party and Kellin was pretty drunk, he always drank so I got him back home and put him in bed. I was beginning to leave when he pulled me on top of him. Kellin and I have had sex before but never when he was drunk, so I said no. All I could say was no no no. But he didn't listen he didn't listen Gerard." The tears were streaming down my face at a pace they never had before.

"That little fucker raped you didn't he?!?" Gerard said it so loud that it scared me, I had never heard him yell before. All I could do was nod and I fell into him. We sat there like that, me sobbing into his shoulder him stroking my hair trying to get me to calm down, for an hour or so until he sat me up.

"I want you to know that I would never think of doing anything like that to you Frankie. And that little fucker is going to get what's coming to him."

"No. Gerard you can't. You don't understand what he is capable of doing. After he did it, he told me the next morning that if I told anyone he would kill me and my mom. You can't. He'll hurt you Gee." I tried to convince him not to try anything.

"He won't do shit. I'll take care of him and you won't be bothered anymore."

"But Gerard you don't underst-"

"Frank, this conversation is over. I'll make him leave and he won't do anything."

I got the hint that he didn't want to talk about it anymore but he really didn't get it. Kellin was a terrible person who didn't care who he hurt as long as in the end he got what he wanted, and in this case, I was what he wanted.

Notes

Uh-Oh. Sorry to the SWS fans I just needed a bad guy and Kellin came to mind. SORRY.! I love Kellin though so I don't even know why I made him such a dick. Welp. Tell me what you think.(: Thank youuuu.