Catch me if I fall

~Rewind: Gerard hears the news.~

Gerards P.O.V
I can't take it. This is real. I fell to my knees and began sobbing. She's gone. She's water under the bridge. I have gotten so attached to her in just the past few days, but now, she's gone. Curling into a ball, I face the corner. I see Mikey leaning against the wall bawling his poor little eyes out. Poor kid. Now I know he really hurts. He really felt something strong for her and she's done. I know this because I feel the same way. I bury my face into my knees and chest and keep crying. My mother and father are sitting on his bed; both crying on each other. We are all just there, for about fifteen minutes, until I notice Mikey cried himself into a deep slumber. I was helping my mum and dad downstairs and then came back to clean Mikey's knuckles. I wrapped them up and carried him to his bed. On my way back downstairs, I saw that my parents wanted to sleep too. They must have needed to get a break from what just happened. I sat down at the kitchen table feeling numb and freaked out. I closed my eyes and was hoping that somehow, in some way, this could change. I do kinda believe in miracles. Maybe she will wake up before they do something. But then again, what if they don't? What if this the end? I started to freak out and hyperventilating too. I rushed back to my room; the basement.
------

I looked at the time. 9:58 p.m. Here I was. In my usual ways. Sitting in a 'Criss cross apple sauce' position on my bed, smoking the finest green, drinking Vodka, and playing the song 'Bastard In Love' by Black Flag softly.

"And what I feel, I'll feel to the end..." I mumbled along, taking another swing of Vodka straight from the bottle. I shook the bottlte to find that it was pretty much empty. I drank the rest, walked upstairs, opened the window, and tossed it out. When I got back I saw that I finished all the weed I had left too. Well shit. I turned the music up just a little bit, and layed back.

I began to think of what COULD happen if she did wake up somehow. Then I started to feelI feel like an asshole. I fell for a girl that I know Mikey fell for. I can't do that, it's even worse considering the fact that we're brothers. It would be a LITTLE easier if we were friends but no. But in a way, I don't have a chance with her. She met Mikes first, she probably feels more comfortable with him, and I'm two years older than her. But, on the other side, we could work. Two years is nothing. And we are really alike. We love music and art, and by the posters in her room, we have the same taste in music and movies. I got happy and tingly at the thought of this. Or that could just be the weed. Other than that, she's... She's... Rad! I don't know how to describe her! She's just so sweet, and gorgeous and has a great sense of humor. Not to mention she seems to be very caring and just plain amazing.

I began to feel fuzzy and happy and even more tingly inside. The thought of her being mine: It made me smile instantly. I actually squealed into my pillow. It felt kinda weird to squeal over a girl like this. I've never felt like this over a girl before, and I've been with a lot. I think the last time I squealed was over something was because of the latest issue of Doom Patrol, not over a girl. So here I am, smiling into my pillow, gushing over Karamel. Even my terminology is different when my mind is on her. Squealed? Gushing? This usually isn't me.

I picked up my phone and saw the time. Holy shit, 1:00 A.M! Damn. I spent that much time thinking of her?

'Just goes to show that you can spend all night thinking of her.' Dammit Gerard! Snap out of it!

I brushed my teeth and switched into different pajamas (My other ones STUNK of weed) and went to bed. Since I wasn't sleepy, I started to think more. Whats gonna happen if she does wake up? Since her dad is involved in this, wil she have to move back with him? I really hope not. As I began to worry, it made my head start to spin and I started to panic. No, I need to think of something else. The only thing that could make me smile was what I was 'Gushing' over before. I felt like a major creep. Ewwww.... but at least I could stop panicking. With her filling my mind with sweetness and bliss, I fell into the best sleep I've had in months.

Notes

hEY! Huehuehuehue, here you go bbys.
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