Nobodies

Frank drags me through the hospital parking lot, grunting,
“Come on, Gee! You have to do this.”
“No! I can’t! I’m not ready!” I protest, fighting against him.
Frank catches me around the waist and tosses me over his shoulder with ease. He may be tiny, but he’s very strong. Remember chapter 1? The kid picked me up by my backpack for Christ’s sakes, so throwing me over his shoulder must be a piece of cake.
“Put me down!” I cry, pounding my fists against his back.
“Gerard, you have to get better,” Frank responds. Part of me feels like he keeps saying things like that just to justify his own actions against me.
We enter the hospital, and boy, does Frank get some looks as he carries a screaming fifteen year old boy larger than him over his back down the halls. He finds a receptionist’s desk, and informs,
“I here to check him into the psychiatric ward.” He jostles me to show that I’m the one who needs help, not him or anyone else.
“What’s your reasoning, sweetie?” the receptionist asks sweetly.
“He’s been self-harming, and he may also need stitches,” Frank replies.
“Fill out these,” she instructs, and I hear the sliding of papers across the desk along with a pen. “You’ll be called when they’re ready to take him.”
“Thanks so much,” Frank replies, turning. He sets me down in a chair, questioning,
“Can I trust you not to run away?”
“You know I’m not five,” I mumble.
Frank frowns. “You’ve kind of been kicking and screaming since we got here, babe.”
He sits in the chair next to me, and starts out the forms.
“What’s your middle name?” Frank asks.
“Arthur,” I answer.
“Arthur,” Frank mutters as he scrawls it down. “Your birthday?”
“I’m not happy about this, you know. I could choose not to be cooperative,” I point out. I cross my arms over my chest, continuing, “But I love you, so I won’t do that.”
“I love you too,” Frank says, and he takes his free hand in mine, lacing our fingers together. “But what’s your birthday?”
“April 9th,” I giggle.
Frank grins at me, and then turns his attention back to the forms. “It’s nice to see you laughing.”
We sit there in silence for a while, until Frank suggests,
“You know, I don’t know that much about you. It’s probably better you filled these out.”
He holds them out towards me, but I dodge them.
Frank frowns. “What’s wrong?”
“I’m not filling out my death warrant,” I reply.
Frank chuckles. “Stop being so dramatic. You know you need the help.”
“I know but….” I turn to Frank. “I’m scared. I’m not ready to do this Frank.”
“Look,” Frank sighs. He sets the papers onto the floor, offering his hands, palms up. I hesitantly place mine into his, and he closes his fists around them. I like it; it makes me feel secure.
“You are very brave, Gerard. You’re intelligent, beautiful, kind, funny, and I could go on for hours. So, you’ve got this problem. It doesn’t dictate your life or your personality; you wouldn’t let it. But, if you carry on this way….” Frank eyes well up with tears, and one falls to the floor, followed by another rolling down his cheek. “I’m afraid you’ll end up dead, Gerard. I need…. I need to be a good boyfriend, and get you the help you deserve.” He crumples down, holding his head in his hands as he sobs, “Before it’s too late.”
I start to cry myself. I pull Frank into my lap, that shaky little boy. I wrap my arms around his hips, locking my hands together on his hipbone. I rock him back and forth, and he buries his face into my chest, clutching onto the front of my shirt as he cries into it.
“Gerard Way, we’re ready for you,” a voice calls.
I turn my head behind me where the voice came from, to see a doctor standing there, smiling politely.
Frank crawls out of my lap, wiping his eyes. “You’ve got to go now, Gerard.”
“I can’t leave you like this. I can’t leave, period! I’m not ready Frank, how many times do I have to say it?!” I shout.
“Gerard, come with me,” the doctor invites.
“No!” I bark. “I’m sorry, but I can’t do that!”
“Just do what she says,” Frank pleads.
“Frank, I can’t do this in a hospital! I’ll get better; I promise! I can’t do this without you! Please don’t let them take me!” I beg.
Frank turns to the lady, his eyes shut. “Take whatever means necessary to get him into treatment.”
The doctor leaves, and I fall to the floor, crawling over to Frank. I kneel, pulling on his shirt. “Frank, please! Don’t do this to me!”
Frank, eyes screwed shut, lets the tears fall down his face. “I’m sorry. But you need this.”
“Frank! I’ll do better, I swear!” I promise. “Just don’t let them taking away from you, from Mikey!”
From the corner of my eye, I see the doctor return, this time, with two muscular looking guys. Shit, they must be the ones prying me away from my Frankie.
They come over, so I grip the legs to Frank’s jeans as tight as I can. “Please don’t do this.”
The men come, and one of them picks me up while the other has to individually pluck each finger from Frank’s jeans. “Frankie, please!”
They carry me away, and I fight against them, even though I know that my efforts are fruitless.
“FRANK!” I holler down the hall. “I NEED YOU!”

Notes

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