The Hard Way
Have You Heard The News That You're Dead?
After an awkward, dead silent, ride home; we got home around 5:30pm. My mom wanted me to go lie down upstairs so I followed her orders.
***
“You know you will be attending school tomorrow, right Gerard?” My mother asked as she leaned against the door frame of my room, as I continued to draw a vampire.
I sighed.
“Yes, I know mom.” I say putting the pencil down. I hated school. I hated my teachers, I hated the students, I hated the staff, I hated learning from adults who were plain assholes to you. I can learn on my own, there is a thing called a library. But I guess learning more from a library can’t get you a job.
“Alright… You can miss first period if you want though…” She says sympathetically.
I don’t want to miss first period… what if I didn’t get to school during passing period. Then I would be forced to go to class late. That would be awful, everyone stares at you as you go hand the teacher the late note. It’s awful.
“That’s okay, I’d rather just go.”
“Alright…” She says walking towards me, sitting on the edge of my bed. “Listen Gee, if you ever want to talk, remember; I’m here for you.”
“Thanks mom.” I say giving her a smile. It’s hard to smile when you’re so sad.
***
I get in one side of our car while Mikey gets in the other. Mikey’s my younger brother he’s awkward and weird, but he has some friends. I think he’s pretty cool. This morning he hadn’t said anything to me, and I didn’t say anything to him.
The car ride was silent, other than some unrecognizable song playing out the radio at a no higher than 5 volume. Me and Mikey got out of the car and went our separate ways without speaking. I walked to sit on a cement wall going surrounding a tree. I got out a book so I wouldn’t look like such a freak sitting there alone.
“Hey pretty boy, where’s the eyeliner today?” A boy says. I look up to see Matt, the guy who just can’t seem to leave me fucking alone. And shit, I forgot to put any eyeliner on today.
I don’t respond, which pissed him off.
“Hey fag, say something.” He says cracking his fists. Is that supposed to scare me or something?
Then another boy comes up and whispers something into Matt’s ear. I look back down at my book and try to ignore them. Then Matt bursts into laughter.
“You tried to kill yourself! Man, how can you fuck that up!? You should have just put a bullet to your brain, man.” Matt says, continuing to laugh and walks away with the other boy.
My whole body freezes. Knots in my stomach forming. How did that boy know that? No one knows except my mom, dad, and… fuck. Mikey. I stand up; I need to find Mikey now. How dare he fucking tell people that?
I walk to where he usually sits; at a table with his friends. He wasn’t there. I look around and see them standing by a wall, rage now building up inside of me. You don’t tell people shit like that, especially when you’re my brother and it’s not true.
I walk up to him. Clenching my fists.
“Hey Mikey.” I growl.
He turns around, no expression. My fist rises fast, and right before it smashes into his face he can see what’s happening.
***
“You know you will be attending school tomorrow, right Gerard?” My mother asked as she leaned against the door frame of my room, as I continued to draw a vampire.
I sighed.
“Yes, I know mom.” I say putting the pencil down. I hated school. I hated my teachers, I hated the students, I hated the staff, I hated learning from adults who were plain assholes to you. I can learn on my own, there is a thing called a library. But I guess learning more from a library can’t get you a job.
“Alright… You can miss first period if you want though…” She says sympathetically.
I don’t want to miss first period… what if I didn’t get to school during passing period. Then I would be forced to go to class late. That would be awful, everyone stares at you as you go hand the teacher the late note. It’s awful.
“That’s okay, I’d rather just go.”
“Alright…” She says walking towards me, sitting on the edge of my bed. “Listen Gee, if you ever want to talk, remember; I’m here for you.”
“Thanks mom.” I say giving her a smile. It’s hard to smile when you’re so sad.
***
I get in one side of our car while Mikey gets in the other. Mikey’s my younger brother he’s awkward and weird, but he has some friends. I think he’s pretty cool. This morning he hadn’t said anything to me, and I didn’t say anything to him.
The car ride was silent, other than some unrecognizable song playing out the radio at a no higher than 5 volume. Me and Mikey got out of the car and went our separate ways without speaking. I walked to sit on a cement wall going surrounding a tree. I got out a book so I wouldn’t look like such a freak sitting there alone.
“Hey pretty boy, where’s the eyeliner today?” A boy says. I look up to see Matt, the guy who just can’t seem to leave me fucking alone. And shit, I forgot to put any eyeliner on today.
I don’t respond, which pissed him off.
“Hey fag, say something.” He says cracking his fists. Is that supposed to scare me or something?
Then another boy comes up and whispers something into Matt’s ear. I look back down at my book and try to ignore them. Then Matt bursts into laughter.
“You tried to kill yourself! Man, how can you fuck that up!? You should have just put a bullet to your brain, man.” Matt says, continuing to laugh and walks away with the other boy.
My whole body freezes. Knots in my stomach forming. How did that boy know that? No one knows except my mom, dad, and… fuck. Mikey. I stand up; I need to find Mikey now. How dare he fucking tell people that?
I walk to where he usually sits; at a table with his friends. He wasn’t there. I look around and see them standing by a wall, rage now building up inside of me. You don’t tell people shit like that, especially when you’re my brother and it’s not true.
I walk up to him. Clenching my fists.
“Hey Mikey.” I growl.
He turns around, no expression. My fist rises fast, and right before it smashes into his face he can see what’s happening.
Dude please update
3/5/15