Chapter 5
Mikey and Gerard left school together the next day. When Gerard could see Mathew and James and everybody else, he quickly paused and looked through his bag.
“Where’s my knife?” he asked. Mikey looked away. “Mikey, where is my fucking knife?!”
Mikey kept walking. “Come on, Gerard.”
Gerard caught a hold of Mikey’s shoulder and yanked him back.
“Ow, come on, Gerard, let go!” he kept saying, slapping away Gerard’s hands.
“Give me back my fucking knife, Mikey! I’m not a fucking terrorist, give me the fucking knife!”
“I don’t have it.”
“Bullshit.”
Gerard yanked off Mikey’s back pack and quickly opened it up. Mikey stopped, sighing and Gerard retrieved his switch blade.
“Thank you, dear brother.” He said sarcastically.
“I just don’t want you to get in trouble.” Mikey whispered as they kept walking.
“Yeah, I’ll be better off dead, huh?” When Mikey didn’t say anything, Gerard sighed. “All right, I’m sorry. I promise I will try not to kill anyone.”
“Oh, come on.” But Mikey smiled.
“Hey, Ger-ard.” Somebody called. Mikey stared straight ahead and kept walking, thinking that Gerard would follow. He then mentally yelled at himself for being so stupid: Gerard had instantly walked up to the group.
“Two syllables- good, good for you.” He was saying sarcastically.
“Aw, come on, just trying to be friendly.” One of them said.
“Gerard, come on.” Mikey said. He tried to grab Gerard’s shoulder, but Gerard shrugged him off.
“And who’s this?” another asked. The whole group surrounded the two of them. Mikey shook his head.
“Hey, leave him out of this.” Gerard demanded. “This is our fight, isn’t it, Mathew?” And instantly, Gerard held up his knife, twirling it slightly in the air.
Mikey quickly looked around, trying to find the best way out of it. He had absolutely no idea what anyone was saying anymore. He felt like he was deaf, only hearing how loudly his heart was beating as he could see Gerard and Mathew talking, somebody pushing Gerard back and yet, through it all, Gerard remained calm. His eyes, though, were going insane.
“I’d love to fight you today, Gerard, I really would,” one of them was saying. “But I can’t. It’d have to be quick.”
“Can you both just fucking get over it?” Mikey suddenly asked. Everybody turned towards him. “I mean, I-“
“I know what you mean.” Mathew smiled kindly and turned back to Gerard, putting a hand on his shoulder.
“I’m really sorry, Gerard. About your balls.”
“About my…”
At that exact moment, Mathew kicked him, hard, down… there. Gerard gasped and fell forward, his face scrunched up in pain. Mikey was horrified. Gerard was growing angrier, not just at what had happened, but for it happening right in front of his brother for God’s sake!
Mathew smiled at Mikey. “I said I was sorry.”
With that, everybody left, laughing. One kicked Gerard’s head, making him dizzy from pain, but that was it. Mikey got down quickly next to Gerard.
“What should I do?” he asked quickly.
“Don’t-touch- anything!” Gerard managed to say. Finally, he caught his breath and Mikey helped him sit up.
“Can I please kill him?” Gerard asked.
“I think that would just make everything worse.”
Gerard clenched his teeth tightly and Mikey helped him back up.
As they got back to walking, Mikey paused. “Wait, let’s stop at Frank’s.”
“No.” Gerard said. He kept walking. Mikey reached out for his arm.
“Frank’s supposed to lend me $50.00.” he pleaded. Gerard sighed.
“Fine. But why do I have to come?”
“Hey, it’s closer this way, anyway.”
“He’s so annoying.” Gerard said.
They both headed uptown towards Frank’s.
“He isn’t annoying, Gerard.” Mikey defended. “He’s really cool.”
“I don’t even know why you bother hanging out with him. He clearly thinks he’s better than us.”
Mikey exhaled. “He doesn’t. He’s really nice and he’s a lot of fun.”
About five minutes later, they arrived at Frank’s neighborhood. It wasn’t a rich neighborhood, but it was still much nicer than Mikey and Gerard’s neighborhood.
“Okay, if he lives around here, why does he bother coming to our house in the first place?” Gerard asked.
“I don’t know, now shut up.” Mikey said.
He knocked on the door and Frank’s mother let them in. Mikey saw the look of disgust that crossed her eyes when she looked at Gerard, with his messy hair and his torn clothes, though she kept a smile on her face the entire time, and prayed that Gerard didn’t notice.
“He’s up in his room. You know how to find him.”
Frank was sitting in his room, practicing guitar, when Mikey came in. He smiled at first, before he realized Gerard was right behind him.
“What’s up?” Frank asked.
“You remember how you said you’d give me some money?” Mikey asked.
He and Frank began to talk, and Gerard slowly walked around the room, looking around at everything.
“Okay, I’ll be right back.” Mikey said quickly. Gerard turned back around. Both of them could see in Frank’s eyes that Frank didn’t want to be left alone with Gerard, but Gerard didn’t care. He didn’t want to be left alone with Frank either.
But clearly, Mikey didn’t give a shit about what either of them thought. He left, leaving Gerard and Frank in awkward silence. Gerard looked up again.
“Hey,” Frank said.
“You know, I’d have thought a guy like you would have about a hundred servants to do your bidding for you.” Gerard responded.
Frank paused, uncertainly, and then shrugged. “What do you mean ‘a guy like me’?”
“One of those rich mother fuckers born with that silver spoon shoved up their ass.” Gerard offered.
Frank stiffened. He sat down on one of the chairs.
“I’m not like that.” Frank said lamely. Gerard laughed.
“Yeah, sure.”
“I mean it, Gerard.” God, where the hell was Mikey? How did he put up with this asshole every day?
“You’re such a fake. God, why the hell do you bother coming over to our house everyday when you live like this? Is it just so that you can look down at us for your own amusement?”
The cold tone of his voice startled Frank. Finally, he said “There’s a difference between being a stuck up asshole and being proud of your family, you know.”
Gerard held his head up, letting his bangs fall back so that Frank could see how cold and mean Gerard’s eyes were.
“Well, I’ll never be able to say that, because besides for Mikey, that would be the biggest fucking lie I ever told.”
Frank felt himself get flushed from anger. And suddenly, without even thinking, he said “You know what? No, I’m not gonna sit here and let you make me feel sorry that my father doesn’t beat me and that my mother’s not too drunk to give a shit about me.”
All at once, Frank wanted to take it back. For the first time of his life, Gerard looked speechless. His eyes widened and he nervously started scratching at his wrists, looking down again, biting his lip. Just as Frank was about to apologize, however, Gerard suddenly looked up and said “So do you even believe all that shit in the bible?”
“Uh, yeah.” Frank said, confused.
“So you believe that being gay and having abortions and all of that will send you to Hell?”
Frank paused. “I mean, it’s in the bible, but…”
“Yes or no?”
Frank paused. “I mean, I guess.”
“Okay”
It was then that Frank realized Gerard had moved and was standing barely an inch in front of him. Before he could do anything, though, Gerard grabbed a handful of Frank’s hair and shoved Frank forward, kissing him on the lips. Frank didn’t even realize what was happening for a moment, but when he did he tried to shove back from Gerard, but he just forced Frank closer, practically suffocating him with it. Then, just as quickly as it had started, it was over. Gerard shoved Frank back and he fell onto the bed.
“Okay, see you in Hell, Frankie.” Gerard laughed. Frank tried to wipe his mouth off, as Gerard headed closer towards the door. Just then, Mikey came back.
“Sorry I took so long.” He said. “What did I… did I miss something important?” he asked when he realized how awkward and nervous Gerard and Frank both looked. Gerard shook his head.
“I’m going home now, Mikey. I don’t think you’re little friend wants me here.”
Without another word, Gerard left. Frank looked back at Mikey for a moment, still trying to understand what had happened. Mikey awkwardly turned back to Frank.
“I’m sorry if he was an asshole or anything.” Mikey quickly said. Frank nodded.
“He’s a little… weird.” Frank managed to say.
“Yeah, I know.” Mikey said. “Come on, let’s go somewhere.”
“Yeah,” Frank said. “Yeah,”
When Mikey got home, he went straight to Gerard’s room.
“Okay, what did you do to Frank?” he asked instantly. Gerard looked up.
“It’s nice to see you too.”
“I’m serious, Gerard!” Mikey said firmly. “What happened between you two today?”
Gerard yawned. “We don’t like each other and neither of us are shy about admitting it.”
“Gerard, will you just stop it for five fucking seconds? Why can’t you just accept that Frank is my friend?”
Gerard scowled and sat up. “You can do so much better than him.”
“And how do you know that? Have you ever spent more than five minutes with him? Have you ever talked about ANYTHING with him? He’s my best friend, Gerard!” Mikey said. Gerard stared at him, his eyes darkening.
“No, I’m your best friend.” He said slowly.
“Act like it, than!” Mikey demanded. He got up and started to leave but Gerard grabbed his hand and pulled him back.
“Come on, I am your best friend, aren’t I?” he asked fearfully. All it took was for Mikey to look at him. Just how scared Gerard looked made Mikey instantly forgot that he was mad. He put his arm around Gerard and softened up.
“Of course you are. But Frank’s also my friend, and I want to be friends with him." Mikey said gently. "He's not gonna replace you or anything."
“I know- that’s not it. It’s just, I don’t know.” Gerard shut his eyes for a minute. He really didn’t know why he hated Frank so much either.
“He’s not gonna replace you, I swear.” Mikey assured him. “But that doesn’t mean I don’t want to be friends with him and he’s a really nice guy. You’d really like him.”
Gerard nodded. “Fine. I’ll play nice or whatever.” Mikey grinned, and then paused.
“Okay, and if it makes you feel better, I yelled at him today too.”
Gerard laughed. “That really does help.”
“And don’t worry. You are my best friend and nobody could ever replace you.”