Eventhough he still had his eyes closed the morning light still doesn't favour the headache he seems to be sporting.
He groans but then suddenly remembers that he didn't fall asleep by himself, trying to go for a subtle approach he shuffles to the middle of his bed, feigning to still be sleeping so he might have a chance of a few more minutes cuddled up against Frank.
When he moves though there seems to be no one sleeping in the middle of the bed, and when he opens his eyes he sees that he's actually all by himself in the double bed that suddenly seems emptier than it had ever been in the two years he's been sleeping in it.

The only trace that's left of Frank spending the night is his smell lingering on Gerard's pillow and against his own skin.
He sighs, he had really tried to hit it off with the guy he met at Danny's, who's name he never even took the chance to learn because he didn't matter to Gerard.
All that mattered was forgetting Frank so they could be friends like they used to before he developed his stupid crush.

It had all started a week or two before summer, Jersey was hit by an early heatwave and since they'd already done all their tests and finished all their projects school had decided to let them go home early for the remaining days of school.
They'd all cram up in Gerard's crappy car, which he loved nontheless, Bob, Mikey and Frank squeezed together on the backseat because they were the youngest, all three had protested when Gerard decided that.
When all were settled they'd drive up to the nearest 7/11 to buy crappy food and cold sodas before heading off for the nearest lake.
The guys would always race eachother into the water the second Gerard parked the car, he himself though unpacked all their food and a blanket to sit on.
While they would strip down to their boxers and jump into the dark lake he would settle on the blanket, leaning back against a tree with his sunglasses on and sketchpad in his lap.
Surely his t-shirt and jeans were too warm for the 3PM sun but even with his best friends he didn't feel comfortable enough.

On one of those days Frank came to sit with him after splashing around for half an hour, he had put his sketchbook away and offered Frank a drink.

[i]"Hey why do you never go in with us man" Frank asked while picking at the tab of the soda can Gerard had handed him.
"I just..I fucking hate swimming" he made up, he actually really liked swimming, him and Mikey would beg their parents to take them to the near by pool when they were younger.
Frank looked unimpressed as he swallowed away a sip of his drink "yeah bullshit, you're lying, you're cracking your knuckles, you only do that when you're lying, so spill it".
He looked down at his hands and cursed himself; his thumb was clenched in his fist and made a faint popping sound "damn it" he muttered and looked up against to see Frank smirking.
He sighed "alright, but you have to promise not to laugh" he insisted, Frank made a V shape with his fingers and spat through it, barely missing the blanket "I promise I won't be a dick, now tell uncle Frankie what's wrong" he said, grabbing one of Gerard's hands.
At first he was surprised by the gesture, he had never held Frank's hand before, it felt nice though and reassuring "well, I mean, look at me, I'm paler than birdshit, chubby and I have gross acné on my body, what if other kids come up here, they'll think I look gross".
While he was saying confessing his insecurities he couldn't bare to look at Frank "hey, first of all have you seen the rest of us, second of all you shouldn't give a single shit about any ones opinion regarding YOUR appearance and lastly I think that you're a gorgeous dude".
This made Gerard smile and he looked up again "thought that I shouldn't give a shit about people's opinion on how I look?" he teased.
Frank thought for a second "alright, don't give a single shit about anyone's opinion but mine" the boys laughed.

Frank didn't go back into the water after that, he'd tried convincing Gerard but when he noticed that his friend wouldn't budge he kept him company, looking over his shoulder as he drew the monsters and heroes they knew from movies.
They came back five times after that and each time Frank would sit next to Gerard to watch him draw, sharing his iPod and simply talking for hours at a time.
Each day he spent in the shadow with Frank pressed up against his side despite the suffocating early summer heat, he noticed his feelings change.
At the end of the week when they had picked their grades up and all passed, they had parted ways, Frank going to his family in Florida and Gerard staying in Jersey, completely confused as to what he felt.[/i]

In the present Gerard was still as confused as he was at the start of summer and to make matters worse the feelings had grown stronger.
There wasn't much to do about it, atleast not now when Frank wasn't here to talk to.
Gerard grabbed his phone and saw that it was just a few minutes before noon, he figured that eventhough he wasn't completely sure that his stomach would be able to hold down food, the promise of Advil and coffee that waited for him upstairs was enough to get him out of bed.

The livingroom was empty, but in the kitchen he found his brother, flipping through a magazine and chewing away on cereal.
When Mikey noticed Gerard walking into the kitchen he dropped his spoon in the bowl, crossed his arms and sat back, silently staring at his older brother.
Gerard felt highly uncomfortable with Mikey's eyes following his every move as he went to pour a cup of coffee.

When he sat down across of him he muttered a good morning before slurping at his coffee, normally his mom would've called him out on this bad manner so he was happy that she was working the saturday afternoon shift today.
After a good few minutes of Mikey not touching his cereal but just staring at Gerard with a certain smugness to his face, he couldn't take it anymore "Mikey for fuck's sakes, would you stop staring at me" he bit as he slammed his mug down on the table.
Mikey placed his hands on the table and leaned forward "y'know, I was up early this morning" Gerard leaned back in his own chair a little to create some distance.
"So I thought why not wake up Frank and Gee so we can watch cartoons or whatever" suddenly Gerard understood why Mikey was acting all weird.
"Is there something you might want to tell me" Mikey asked, Gerard tried to think of excuses and when he found himself about to pop one of his knuckles he sighed.
"Fine" he whispered and to his surprise Mikey sat back in his chair and nodded for Gerard to continue.
He squeezed his eyes shut and sighed "I like Frank a fuck ton and it sucks because I'm ruining our friendship because I'm a giant fucking idiot who can't control his feelings and please Mikey, please don't tell anyone" he spilled.
Anyone but Mikey would not have been able to make something coherent out of the rushed words Gerard had just blurted out, but Mikey had heard every single one of them.
He expected his brother to get angry, to yell at him for being a lousy friend and brother but instead Mikey got up and sat next to him, enveloping him in his arms "that sucks bro, you should've told me sooner".
"I know" he whined "but you don't think I'm weird or something right, 'cause it would be kinda nice to talk about it with someone".
Mikey let go of him and smiled "how could it be weird, I mean Frank's hot as fuck, smart, funny" Gerard's eyes grew big "Mikey!" he protested.
His brother chuckled "I was just screwing with you, he's totally not my type" Gerard softly punched his brother in the shoulder "not funny" he said with fake anger in his voice.
Mikey grinned at him "hey but from now on I'm your personal confidant again, I expect to hear every juicy detail" he said while he got up to throw the remains of his cereal in the garbage.
"I'll tell you everything but I'm afraid there won't be anything juicy happening" he said mocking himself.
Mikey sat on the counter top "well with the way he was pretty much sleeping on top of you this morning...".
"Yeah but he was drunk Mikey, and he didn't even say goodbye when he left" Gerard muttered.
"So what, I read that people give in to their true feelings when they're drunk, y'know losing all inhibitions and stuff like that" Mikey explained, kicking his heels against the kitchen cabinet.
"Whatever, could you stop kicking the fucking cabinet, my head is about to explode" he groaned, pressing his palms against the sides of his head.
Mikey hopped off again and poured a glass of water "you're such a cry baby dude, here go take a nap or something" his brother put the glass infront of Gerard along with a strip that still had to advils left that he'd just found in one of the drawers.
He thanked Mikey and went back down to his room, taking one of the pills and lay down on his bed, he felt really lucky for having a little brother as awesome as Mikey.
-
When he woke up the light in his room wasn't as bright anymore and his headache completely gone,
he stretched and yawned before he properly opened his eyes.
He patted his hand around his pillow, taking a few second to find his phone, he had a missed call from Frank, which he wouldn't respond to and saw that it was four in the afternoon now.
Those few extra hours of rest had done him well and completely against his normal saturday afternoon nature he decided to be productive.
All throughout the week teachers had been giving their senior students lectures on how they couldn't start early enough with college applications and final projects.
Given that he wanted to go to an art school, it was the only class he had started planning his final project for.
He had no idea where he wanted to go to college, maybe New York or LA, the first close enough to still feel like home and the second place far enough to start a whole new life.
At this point he didn't even know what he wanted; security or adventure, either would put him on a different path and it scared the living hell out of him.

Browsing on his laptop he found a few schools that spoke to him, some near Jersey and others far away from his home state.
He made sure to bookmark all the possibilities for future reference when he had the mandatory talk about his post-high school academics.

After that he took a shower, the smell of sweat and smoke from last night still clinging to him and when fresh and clean read a few chapters for his English class, which he didn't mind, literature was one of his favourite subjects.
Then he doodled around in one of his older sketchbooks that still had the odd blank page left here and there, trying to perfect his cross-shading when he heard the door bell ring.
As far as he knew they weren't expecting anybody, he tried his best to reach his doorhandle from his bed but pretty much faceplanted in his attempt to do so.
While he crawled upright he could hear Mikey greeting someone who had a very familiar voice.
He couldn't quite make up what they were saying before he heard their footsteps came closer and their words clearer "yeah let's go wake him up".
He gasped, jumped up and made a dive for his bed, he would deal with his brother's rogue actions later, first he needed to find something that didn't make him look like he had just fallen out of bed and listened in on Frank and Mikey's conversation which he didn't even properly hear.
He settled for the book he'd been reading an hour earlier and opened it on a random page just as the door to his room flung open.

"Good afternoon sleeping beauty, I come with movies and more booze because there ain't no better cure for a hangover" Frank sing-songed as he threw himself on Gerard.
He thought that after last night Frank would've felt weird, maybe he'd been so drunk that he didn't remember it the next morning, but even then he'd still have to have questioned why he woke up snuggled up against Gerard.
"Yeah hey Frankie, fuck get off of me" he whined the last part of his sentence because Frank's knee digging in his thigh kinda hurt.
Frank rolled off sideways and folded his arms behind his head as a makeshift pillow "you were much sweeter about me cuddling with you yesterday" he smiled.
Gerard felt himself turning red and he looked at Mikey who was standing next to the bed biting on his thumbnail in an attempt to hide his grin.
"Frank's parents were going to a party tonight so his mom asked our mom if it was okay that he stayed over again since they'd come home really late, and they think little Frankie here needs a babysitter" Mikey explained, getting flipped off by Frank.

"Yup, but now we can get shitfaced again while watching crappy horror movies" Frank said nudging his backpack at the end of the bed with his foot.
Alcohol would certainly help, Gerard thought "but mom and dad aren't going anywhere right, do you seriously think they'll let us drink actual booze infront of them".
Mikey sighed and rolled his eyes "of course not, I don't know if you've noticed but mom and dad gave you a pretty sweet TV set for your birthday" he said pointing at the flatscreen on his drawer.
"Plus, a bed this big and comfy is way better than a couch right" Frank added, Gerard had to agree that despite possible awkwardness it could turn out to a fun evening and if he tried it could be just like old times.
"Alright douchebags, but first I need some food in my stomach I haven't eaten all day" he said as he jumped off his bed, followed by Mikey and Frank to the kitchen.

-

After dinner and some obligatory TV watching with Gerard and Mikey's parents in the livingroom the boys went back downstairs, making sure to bring popcorn, soda and glasses, they'd pull out the camping bed from Gerard's closet so they could all sleep in one room later.
"Alright I suggest to get in the mood we start of with a drinking game" Frank said while he filled each glass half up with whiskey he got somewhere and topped it off with coke "each time there's blood you have to take a big sip" he handed Mikey and Gerard their glasses.
It smelled strong and he knew that he would regret his decision later on "how the fuck did you even manage to get freakin' whiskey man" he asked.
"I know the right people" Frank said, Mikey and Gerard looked at eachother and shrugged.
Gerard pulled a random DVD from the pile Frank had made on the bed and put it in the DVD player, pushing play for what seemed a dozen times to skip through the various menus before the opening credits finally started rolling over the screen.
They didn't have to hold their drinks in hand long because not even a minute into the movie there was already a cheap scream queen being slashed by a dude in a mask.
It was one of those really crappy horror movies that lay around forgotten in the sales bin for a couple of dollars at discount stores.

Half way through the movie the decided that if they didn't want to die of alcohol poisoning with fake blood splurting around in almost every scene, that it would be a better idea to cut out their drinking game and the movie all together.
Instead they started talking, filling their glasses up to the rim every now and then with either coke or whiskey depending on who was holding which bottle.
The three of them hadn't done proper catching up since school started almost a week ago and they enjoyed the small talk.
Gerard really enjoyed Frank slumped against him, they were now just passing the bottle around and giggling.
"Let's play truth or dare" Mikey suddenly opted, Frank and Gerard both slurred some form of agreement.
"Alright Mikey, truth or dare" Frank said, wobbily pointing his finger in Mikey's face before pushing his glasses back up his nose.
"Dare" Mikey said.
Frank thought for a second "I dare you to kiss Bob on monday, full on the mouth while you grab his face".
Mikey simply shrugged, his eyes looking hazy, Gerard knew that his brother would regret this "cool with me, truth or dare Frankie".
"Truth".
"Alright do you know a person you could fall in love with" Mikey asked, ignoring the invisible daggers Gerard was shooting him due to his lack of subtelty.
Frank didn't answer right away but scratched his head and looked as if he was carefully weighing out options in his mind.
He knew the answer but it still hurt when Frank answered with a simple [i]nah[/i] to Mikey's question.
His brother had seen the sad look in Gerard's eyes and cut the game short much to Frank's protest "dude fuck it, I'm waaaaay too hammered for this" Mikey drawled.

They retorted to some more heavily slurred babbling when suddenly Mikey started yawning "m tired" he said while he crawled to the camping bed.
He waved one arm up "you two just keep talkin' I'm just closin' my eyes for a sec" the moment he closed his eyes though Mikey passed out.
Gerard giggled and leaned over his sleeping brother to grab his glasses off to secure them on his bedside table, he'd already managed to fuck up two pairs in the last 12 months and their parents wouldn't be too happy with another cracked frame.
When he turned around he saw Frank smiling up at him, normally he could blame the butterflies on drunk jitters but even being completely wasted he knew that this was all Frank's doing.
"You never took a turn for truth or dare" Frank said "that's unacceptable man".
Gerard smiled "ask ahead".
Frank rolled his eyes dramatically "alright truth or dare" putting extra emphasis one the a and r in dare, making Gerard believe that his friend had thought of something good.
"Fuck it, dare" he said.
He never expected what Frank would say next though.
"I dare you to kiss me."