Show Me What Your Working With
Strut
***Frank*** Want….. Want…… Want……
It was a rolling whisper in his mind, impossible to reign in. And, if he thought about it, something he did not particularly wonder too hard on how to get rid of.
It was a melancholy reminder. A reminder of what he lost that stormy night, what he had been searching for since, a reminder, of the wish he had made, the price that had should’ve been too high, but, he had paid. The night he sold his soul, and in such doing, gaining an immortal life that he never wished for, and not just for him. What he had cost his lover who had run away, the one he had only wished to get back.
All he had wanted was to go back in time and have another chance, or to at least have a second chance in the present. For he had let the best thing in his life go, had been silent as he watched him leave, but he wanted to take it all back, now.
The genii who had granted his wish, in trade for his soul, gave him a million chances. He would now live forever, as would the man he loved, but in two, very different ways. He would live forever, if he drank the blood of living men. Gerard, the man he loved, however, would be reborn again and again each time in a different part of the world, until Frank could find him.
And while that seems so simple, just find the boy again and whisk him away, make him his once more, it wasn’t that easy.
It never was.
Many times he would find Gerard already married with children, and he couldn’t bear the thought of taking him away from that, others he found him on his deathbed, and that one horrible time where Gerard was the most homophobic asshole in the history of the universe and left Frank for dead in an alley not far from where he lived. It had been one of the many, many, times Frank wished he could die.
But, the Genii swore he and Gerard would one day be together. It was what kept him going. The want, want, want, want, want, want.
It wasn’t until September 19th, 2015, that Frank finally got the chance he had been waiting lifetimes for. But, the question stood, is this the lifetime he will spend with Gerard? Is this his official second chance?
Because, in the large area of New York's Times Square there sat a medium sized stage. On that stage, standing there with the sass of a queen, was a performer. Not one you see everyday, but a performer all the same.
"My name is Gerard Way, fashion designer since birth. No need to turn around and point to it, but I am here to tell you all that you are the first to see my new fall collection." His voice was rich and clear through the microphone that seemed to be taped on him somewhere.
Murmurs went up around us. “Is that really him.” “Oh, fuck work, this is more important.” and the most popular “I can’t believe I didn’t recognize him!” Frank was surprised, too. There was just no way you could miss the man, even if you hadn’t been in love with him since circa the 1200’s.
Gerard looked like he had woken up in a fabric store and made clothes out of whatever he picked up off the ground. In a horrible clash of brights and darks and patterns that should never go together. Yet, somehow, through the absurdity of it, he matched and managed to look gorgeous.
“Yes, you heard me right. All of you motherfuckers are the first to see it.” He shared the news again with a saucy roll of his hips. His statement was met by cheers from the people nearby and a sudden crowding around the stage. These people were willing to mosh to get to see these new designs. He must be famous.
"Way, sir, what is your inspiration behind these pieces?" Ahh... Frank had been wondering how long it would take the mass media companies and channels to try and stick their filthy paws into this.
"I wanted to start a revolution." He stared out over the crowd with a cocky smirk. "You see, these dresses on this rack?" He stood pointing to the rack two feet to the left of him. "These dresses are for males. In girl sizes and onward. It is a.... type of personal solution, if you will."
"Do you actually think these will sell, Way?"
"It's all about the execution, sugar." He winked towards the woman reporter who had asked.
"Way, is it true you used to be an alcoholic and a druggie and your only inspiration came from having intimate relations with your younger sibling?"
"One, we have all got our own pollution, let's leave mine alone. Two, no, no that is not true."
By now he was kneeling on the platform talking to the crowd of people around him. Even sitting in what could be seen as a very submissive pose, the dominance, for lack of a better word, automatically put those around him on their best behavior.
"Why did you decide to go this route with your ideas after four years of only women’s clothing?"
"I had certain obligations that year. It was kinda like I had something to say but my hands were tied." Frank knew the feeling well.
“Sir, may I try on a dress?”
“Person who asked that, please raise you hand.” A boy, maybe around nineteen shakily raised his hand.
“Come on up, there is a dressing room behind that curtain over there. What is your name?”
“Christopher.”
“Well then, Christopher… this one looks like it would match you perfectly. Now go change, I wanna see it on you.” Gerard was buried in clothes for a moment before coming out with a tan dress with skulls on it. He handed it to the boy and shooed him off to the dressing room.
“Can I try one?”
“How about me?”
“That’s not fair!”
“Guys shouldn’t even be wearing dresses!”
“Aww…. Come on. First come first served, babes. And, whoever said that last one, please leave and never come back. I don‘t give a shit if guys wearing dresses bothers you, but that does not mean you can say stuff like that. You are a beautiful girl, too. Why not be pretty on the inside? Why the hate, sugar?”
The conversation was stopped when Christopher walked out of the dresing room in full get-up. A tiny black belt circled his waist and his make up was expertly done. Gerard let out a wolf whistle.
“Dayum, you look nice. I see the girls got to ya, huh? Do you like your look, we can take it off if you would like. But if you like it you can keep it.”
And while Frank was not attracted to him in any way he had to admit Christopher did look good. He had skinny legs and his waist curved in like a girls giving him the perfect body shape. The dress was obviously made for flat chested girls… or I guess made with guys in mind for it gave the hint of curves up top without looking like you were stuffing a bra. ‘The Girls’ or whoever was back there did amazing things with his hair and make up, too. He kinda looked like-
“Don’t it feel good? Don’t it feel… hot?” Gerard’s voice was simply… sex.
Christopher nodded shyly his face flushing from all praise.
“Has anyone ever told you that you look like Tommy Ratliff?”
“Yeah, actually. Some fan girl of mine online.”
“You have fan girls?” Gerard crooned. Christopher’s face flushed deeper, looking more maroon than red, now. He gave a nervous giggle.
“Just three or four, I posted a few pictures online of me and some girls flipped.”
“Aww… I see. It’s how you get all the ladies and all the guys. I see how you roll. You got people fallin’ all over you. Look, that boy in the third row, he is literally drooling over you.” It seemed Gerard had totally had given up on answering questions from the press and was taking some kind of joy in both embarrassing this boy and boosting his ego.
“That’s my boyfriend.”
“Your boyfriend? Well, I guess I know who not to flirt with when the showing is over.” With another wink he led Christopher off the stage and began once more to answer questions, strutting around stage like he owned the world and showing off different pieces.
But, none of it mattered to Frank, the only thing running through his mind was that Gerard was single, his age, gay, and everything like he was the first time they met. It was a horrible feeling of ‘this is my chance’ and ‘this is so similar to the very first time, am I destined to mess it up again?’
So Frank waited to talk to Gerard, waited in line for four hours to reach the table he where he sat, it gave him time to think, though. I mean what could he say? ‘Hi, I am pretty sure you are my soul mate and I have been searching for you for over two hundred lifetimes. I want to make you mine and turn you into a vampire, too, because that way we can live forever. P.S, please don’t kill me because I kinda sold my soul for this and will have no where to go.’
It sounded stupid to Frank, too. “Hello, you are my last person to talk to. Woo, that was exhausting. Anyway, what can I do for you.” He said this without looking up.
“Umm… Gerard. I just…. Well, you see… and I…” Gerard’s head snapped up so quickly Frank was surprised it didn’t snap off.
“Frank. Holy, shit. Is your name Frank?”
“Frank Iero, yes. Why? Do you remember me?”
“You’ve been in my dreams.” Gerard had gotten out of his chair and was backing away slowly. “You killed me, over and over and over again.”
“What? I would never. I could never hurt you, Gee, listen, please. I don’t know what happens in your dreams, but it isn’t true.” He stopped, about five feet and a table in-between them.
“Tell the truth!” Gerard hisses, an almost shout. But, that would attract attention.
“Ask me something. Anything.”
“Have you ever killed me? I had a dream you held me as I bled to death. You were the last one I saw.”
“ I have never killed you. That.. You had been driving to the hospital to see your wife, she had gone into labor and a drunk driver hit you, you rolled over into the ditch and hit a tree. Yes, all I could do is hold you.” Gerard’s face was blank as he processed this. The flashes of memories running through as he unconsciously grabbed his chest. Right where the car door had pierced his lungs. “The time before, you were the last thing I saw in this… white room, with flashes. And you said sleep now, I didn’t mean to hurt you.”
“You died of cancer. I had tried to hug you but you were in so much pain everything that touched you hurt.”
“Cancer.” He repeated. “You were best man at my wedding once, or was that a dream?”
“August 4th, 1927, to a wonderful woman named Lindsey.”
“How have you lived so long? How have I lived so long? But if I died how am I back? Why do I believe you? Why do you follow me?”
Frank couldn’t help but give a humorless laugh. “It’s all my fault. But it is too late to tell the story here. We need to go somewhere else, or meet tomorrow. Somewhere public, as you are still afraid of me.”
“You would be too, asshole, if you were in my position.” He muttered. I probably would not have been able to hear him if I wasn’t what I was.
“Do you want to hear it or not?”
“Alright, alright, come with me to this club. My friends run it.”
“Right. Totally not going to get the shit beat out of me for seemingly killing you over and over. Probably going to die.”
“You can’t die, silly. You are a vampire.” He snorted before freezing in place. “What did I just say? Why do I know that? Is that a dream, either? Are you a vampire.”
The chair he was once sitting on was now in his hands, lifted as if to hit me.
“Yeah. I am a vampire.”
“Are you going to eat me?”
It was Frank’s turn to snort. “No, no, I won’t.”
“Good, because I just released my newest collection and I am too young to die.” Gerard’s voice was shaky and breathy, as his attempt to sound unafraid fell through. “No, wait. Here, call me. That way I don’t have to be within eating distance.”
Frank rolled his eyes but agreed as they exchanged numbers verbally as Gerard was now shouting from twenty feet away. Frank would take it, it was his second chance. And Gerard believed him, it wasn’t the way he wanted the secret to come out but better than the past few life times. Frank would take it gladly.
****** Two weeks, three days, nine hours, thirty seconds later.****
“So you are telling me that you watched me walk out, said nothing as you watched the best thing in your life walk away?”
“Yes.” It came out choked.
“You went and made a wish with a fucking Genii to get a second chance, and he made you a vampire and I die and get reborn over and over until you turn me into a vampire and we live happily ever after.”
“Kinda.”
“I don’t want to believe you. I really don’t. But, I do. Kinda. Not completely. But… let’s try one date. Okay? Can you do that?”
“Anywhere. Anytime. I will do anything, Gee.”
“Yeah, don’t say stuff like that, it sounds really creepy and stalker-like. Meet me down on Twenty-Second down by The Lake. We will figure out what to do from there.”
“Okay.” This was it. Frank’s official second try. And he wasn’t going to mess this up. He was going to show Gerard how much he loves him, is going to be the best he can be. Isn’t going to let the best thing in his life slip away again.
It was a rolling whisper in his mind, impossible to reign in. And, if he thought about it, something he did not particularly wonder too hard on how to get rid of.
It was a melancholy reminder. A reminder of what he lost that stormy night, what he had been searching for since, a reminder, of the wish he had made, the price that had should’ve been too high, but, he had paid. The night he sold his soul, and in such doing, gaining an immortal life that he never wished for, and not just for him. What he had cost his lover who had run away, the one he had only wished to get back.
All he had wanted was to go back in time and have another chance, or to at least have a second chance in the present. For he had let the best thing in his life go, had been silent as he watched him leave, but he wanted to take it all back, now.
The genii who had granted his wish, in trade for his soul, gave him a million chances. He would now live forever, as would the man he loved, but in two, very different ways. He would live forever, if he drank the blood of living men. Gerard, the man he loved, however, would be reborn again and again each time in a different part of the world, until Frank could find him.
And while that seems so simple, just find the boy again and whisk him away, make him his once more, it wasn’t that easy.
It never was.
Many times he would find Gerard already married with children, and he couldn’t bear the thought of taking him away from that, others he found him on his deathbed, and that one horrible time where Gerard was the most homophobic asshole in the history of the universe and left Frank for dead in an alley not far from where he lived. It had been one of the many, many, times Frank wished he could die.
But, the Genii swore he and Gerard would one day be together. It was what kept him going. The want, want, want, want, want, want.
It wasn’t until September 19th, 2015, that Frank finally got the chance he had been waiting lifetimes for. But, the question stood, is this the lifetime he will spend with Gerard? Is this his official second chance?
Because, in the large area of New York's Times Square there sat a medium sized stage. On that stage, standing there with the sass of a queen, was a performer. Not one you see everyday, but a performer all the same.
"My name is Gerard Way, fashion designer since birth. No need to turn around and point to it, but I am here to tell you all that you are the first to see my new fall collection." His voice was rich and clear through the microphone that seemed to be taped on him somewhere.
Murmurs went up around us. “Is that really him.” “Oh, fuck work, this is more important.” and the most popular “I can’t believe I didn’t recognize him!” Frank was surprised, too. There was just no way you could miss the man, even if you hadn’t been in love with him since circa the 1200’s.
Gerard looked like he had woken up in a fabric store and made clothes out of whatever he picked up off the ground. In a horrible clash of brights and darks and patterns that should never go together. Yet, somehow, through the absurdity of it, he matched and managed to look gorgeous.
“Yes, you heard me right. All of you motherfuckers are the first to see it.” He shared the news again with a saucy roll of his hips. His statement was met by cheers from the people nearby and a sudden crowding around the stage. These people were willing to mosh to get to see these new designs. He must be famous.
"Way, sir, what is your inspiration behind these pieces?" Ahh... Frank had been wondering how long it would take the mass media companies and channels to try and stick their filthy paws into this.
"I wanted to start a revolution." He stared out over the crowd with a cocky smirk. "You see, these dresses on this rack?" He stood pointing to the rack two feet to the left of him. "These dresses are for males. In girl sizes and onward. It is a.... type of personal solution, if you will."
"Do you actually think these will sell, Way?"
"It's all about the execution, sugar." He winked towards the woman reporter who had asked.
"Way, is it true you used to be an alcoholic and a druggie and your only inspiration came from having intimate relations with your younger sibling?"
"One, we have all got our own pollution, let's leave mine alone. Two, no, no that is not true."
By now he was kneeling on the platform talking to the crowd of people around him. Even sitting in what could be seen as a very submissive pose, the dominance, for lack of a better word, automatically put those around him on their best behavior.
"Why did you decide to go this route with your ideas after four years of only women’s clothing?"
"I had certain obligations that year. It was kinda like I had something to say but my hands were tied." Frank knew the feeling well.
“Sir, may I try on a dress?”
“Person who asked that, please raise you hand.” A boy, maybe around nineteen shakily raised his hand.
“Come on up, there is a dressing room behind that curtain over there. What is your name?”
“Christopher.”
“Well then, Christopher… this one looks like it would match you perfectly. Now go change, I wanna see it on you.” Gerard was buried in clothes for a moment before coming out with a tan dress with skulls on it. He handed it to the boy and shooed him off to the dressing room.
“Can I try one?”
“How about me?”
“That’s not fair!”
“Guys shouldn’t even be wearing dresses!”
“Aww…. Come on. First come first served, babes. And, whoever said that last one, please leave and never come back. I don‘t give a shit if guys wearing dresses bothers you, but that does not mean you can say stuff like that. You are a beautiful girl, too. Why not be pretty on the inside? Why the hate, sugar?”
The conversation was stopped when Christopher walked out of the dresing room in full get-up. A tiny black belt circled his waist and his make up was expertly done. Gerard let out a wolf whistle.
“Dayum, you look nice. I see the girls got to ya, huh? Do you like your look, we can take it off if you would like. But if you like it you can keep it.”
And while Frank was not attracted to him in any way he had to admit Christopher did look good. He had skinny legs and his waist curved in like a girls giving him the perfect body shape. The dress was obviously made for flat chested girls… or I guess made with guys in mind for it gave the hint of curves up top without looking like you were stuffing a bra. ‘The Girls’ or whoever was back there did amazing things with his hair and make up, too. He kinda looked like-
“Don’t it feel good? Don’t it feel… hot?” Gerard’s voice was simply… sex.
Christopher nodded shyly his face flushing from all praise.
“Has anyone ever told you that you look like Tommy Ratliff?”
“Yeah, actually. Some fan girl of mine online.”
“You have fan girls?” Gerard crooned. Christopher’s face flushed deeper, looking more maroon than red, now. He gave a nervous giggle.
“Just three or four, I posted a few pictures online of me and some girls flipped.”
“Aww… I see. It’s how you get all the ladies and all the guys. I see how you roll. You got people fallin’ all over you. Look, that boy in the third row, he is literally drooling over you.” It seemed Gerard had totally had given up on answering questions from the press and was taking some kind of joy in both embarrassing this boy and boosting his ego.
“That’s my boyfriend.”
“Your boyfriend? Well, I guess I know who not to flirt with when the showing is over.” With another wink he led Christopher off the stage and began once more to answer questions, strutting around stage like he owned the world and showing off different pieces.
But, none of it mattered to Frank, the only thing running through his mind was that Gerard was single, his age, gay, and everything like he was the first time they met. It was a horrible feeling of ‘this is my chance’ and ‘this is so similar to the very first time, am I destined to mess it up again?’
So Frank waited to talk to Gerard, waited in line for four hours to reach the table he where he sat, it gave him time to think, though. I mean what could he say? ‘Hi, I am pretty sure you are my soul mate and I have been searching for you for over two hundred lifetimes. I want to make you mine and turn you into a vampire, too, because that way we can live forever. P.S, please don’t kill me because I kinda sold my soul for this and will have no where to go.’
It sounded stupid to Frank, too. “Hello, you are my last person to talk to. Woo, that was exhausting. Anyway, what can I do for you.” He said this without looking up.
“Umm… Gerard. I just…. Well, you see… and I…” Gerard’s head snapped up so quickly Frank was surprised it didn’t snap off.
“Frank. Holy, shit. Is your name Frank?”
“Frank Iero, yes. Why? Do you remember me?”
“You’ve been in my dreams.” Gerard had gotten out of his chair and was backing away slowly. “You killed me, over and over and over again.”
“What? I would never. I could never hurt you, Gee, listen, please. I don’t know what happens in your dreams, but it isn’t true.” He stopped, about five feet and a table in-between them.
“Tell the truth!” Gerard hisses, an almost shout. But, that would attract attention.
“Ask me something. Anything.”
“Have you ever killed me? I had a dream you held me as I bled to death. You were the last one I saw.”
“ I have never killed you. That.. You had been driving to the hospital to see your wife, she had gone into labor and a drunk driver hit you, you rolled over into the ditch and hit a tree. Yes, all I could do is hold you.” Gerard’s face was blank as he processed this. The flashes of memories running through as he unconsciously grabbed his chest. Right where the car door had pierced his lungs. “The time before, you were the last thing I saw in this… white room, with flashes. And you said sleep now, I didn’t mean to hurt you.”
“You died of cancer. I had tried to hug you but you were in so much pain everything that touched you hurt.”
“Cancer.” He repeated. “You were best man at my wedding once, or was that a dream?”
“August 4th, 1927, to a wonderful woman named Lindsey.”
“How have you lived so long? How have I lived so long? But if I died how am I back? Why do I believe you? Why do you follow me?”
Frank couldn’t help but give a humorless laugh. “It’s all my fault. But it is too late to tell the story here. We need to go somewhere else, or meet tomorrow. Somewhere public, as you are still afraid of me.”
“You would be too, asshole, if you were in my position.” He muttered. I probably would not have been able to hear him if I wasn’t what I was.
“Do you want to hear it or not?”
“Alright, alright, come with me to this club. My friends run it.”
“Right. Totally not going to get the shit beat out of me for seemingly killing you over and over. Probably going to die.”
“You can’t die, silly. You are a vampire.” He snorted before freezing in place. “What did I just say? Why do I know that? Is that a dream, either? Are you a vampire.”
The chair he was once sitting on was now in his hands, lifted as if to hit me.
“Yeah. I am a vampire.”
“Are you going to eat me?”
It was Frank’s turn to snort. “No, no, I won’t.”
“Good, because I just released my newest collection and I am too young to die.” Gerard’s voice was shaky and breathy, as his attempt to sound unafraid fell through. “No, wait. Here, call me. That way I don’t have to be within eating distance.”
Frank rolled his eyes but agreed as they exchanged numbers verbally as Gerard was now shouting from twenty feet away. Frank would take it, it was his second chance. And Gerard believed him, it wasn’t the way he wanted the secret to come out but better than the past few life times. Frank would take it gladly.
****** Two weeks, three days, nine hours, thirty seconds later.****
“So you are telling me that you watched me walk out, said nothing as you watched the best thing in your life walk away?”
“Yes.” It came out choked.
“You went and made a wish with a fucking Genii to get a second chance, and he made you a vampire and I die and get reborn over and over until you turn me into a vampire and we live happily ever after.”
“Kinda.”
“I don’t want to believe you. I really don’t. But, I do. Kinda. Not completely. But… let’s try one date. Okay? Can you do that?”
“Anywhere. Anytime. I will do anything, Gee.”
“Yeah, don’t say stuff like that, it sounds really creepy and stalker-like. Meet me down on Twenty-Second down by The Lake. We will figure out what to do from there.”
“Okay.” This was it. Frank’s official second try. And he wasn’t going to mess this up. He was going to show Gerard how much he loves him, is going to be the best he can be. Isn’t going to let the best thing in his life slip away again.
HAHAHA!! yeah it's super close but still seems so damn far away and i'm stocking up on my tissues, having used them all up with my reaction to the last chapter. ;-;
9/20/13