I woke up in my room Completley dressed and my hair was wet. I'm guessing I took a shower. Then I rolled over and felt the pain in my lower back and everything that just happened came flooding back to my mind. I looked to my desk to see gerard sitting there reading my journal. "What the fuck do you think your doing!" He knew from when he were friends that you should never ever read it. It held every single secret I had. He turned to look at me and I saw he was crying. "Frank.." "Gerard get out! I told you to never read that you ass!" He just looked down and kept sobbing. "I'm the reason aren't I?" I just looked at him confused "reason for what?"

He walked over and sat on my bed. He reached over and rolled up my sleeves revealing my cuts. "I'm the reason for that aren't I."
"Gerard go!"
"Why didnt you ever tell me you felt like this! Why didn't you ever tell me about your dad! Frank why do you hate me?!"
"gerard get the fuck out before I make you leave!" "No! I'm not leaving until I get an explanation!" "You want an explanation! Ok well you fucking left me! You told me to stay away from you and mikey! You were my only fucking friends I don't even have another parent to go to for christs sake! I was so alone and coming home and having the fucking crap beat out of me didnt help! The worst part though was that you left with mikey and kept on going with your lives never looking back. You never even fucking told me why you suddenly hated me or why you left!"

"Fr-frank I.."
"No I don't want your fucking pity! Just go!"
""I'm not leaving you here with your dad!! He'll hurt you again!"
"we'll what the fuck do you want me to do he already took my fucking virginity!!"
"h-he..your dad was your f-first..? Fuck!"
"What?"
"I-I just nothing.."

I just layed back on the bed, but gee didnt leave he just sat there and watched me. "Am I like suddenly a fucking model or something because your creeping me out with all the staring"
"no just..sorry I was thinking." "About...." "You."
"What about me?" "Just how do you do it. Like everyday you go to school knowing that when you go home 'this' could happen?"

I hadn't really told anyone but I do have a sister. She left with my mom, but ran away from her. We still keep in touch and it helps a lot. I haven't seen in her 7 years though we mainly just call and text. McKenna is her name but I always called her Kenna. "frank?" "What? Sorry I was just thinking."
Gerard opened his mouth to respond but then we heard the front door open "FRANK!" Gerard just looked at me and he looked terrified. "Yea dad..."