Denial
~Chapter 1 ~
Five Years. That's how long it's been that Gerard has been hiding his feelings for Frank.
When they were 12 two major things happened. Frank came out of the closet and Gerard developed feelings for Frank.
It was a Friday that he decided to tell Frank how he really felt about him. That morning he marched into school with a steely determination. He was about to tell his best friend how he really felt about him. He saw a crowd of kids around his and Franks locker. Some were just watching but most were yelling FAG! and QUEER! As he neared the crowd what he saw broke him. There was Frank in the middle of the crowd getting kicked and punched mercilessly by guys and girls. His lip was split, he had two black eyes, and he already had cuts and bruises all over his body. This went for five more minutes until some teachers came running down the hall yelling for the crowd to separate and for the assaulters to stop. All the meanwhile Gerard just stood there and watched. He watched for those five minutes while Frank was being beaten. He watched as some faculty picked Frank up and took him to the nurses office. He watched while some of the crowd laughed and joked and said "that the fag got what he deserved!". He spent the rest of the day feeling numb. Had he really just sat there watching his crush/ best friend get beat up? Why? He asked himself. He was afraid and a coward hefinally determined. He knew what he felt for Frank wasn't wrong but the fear was greater. He decided that no matter what he had to stop everything with Frank. He was already an outcast and bullied the last thing he needed was for people to know he had feelings for Frank. He also knew though that if he stayed friends with Frank he would also be targeted just for associating with the "QUEER". * Time Lapse next Friday* All week Frank had been trying to get Gerards attention. Gerard kept true to his word and cut off Frank. Everytime he would get near him he would walk the opposite direction. If Frank was calling his name he would turn his headphones up a little louder and walk faster. Finally after a week of trying Frank cornered Gerard at the front of the school after the final bell rang. He started talking loudly about how he had been trying to get to him all week. The school bullies heard this while exiting the school and took this chance to mess with them. They circled the two boys. They started teasing Frank saying that "Not even your fag boyfriend loves you queer cause your such a worthless piece of shit!" Answering at the same time they both denied being each others boyfriend. Of course no one believed them even thoughFrank insisted that they were just friends. Deciding to have a little fun the bullies turned to Gerard. They asked him if it was true was he really friends with the fag? Cause they said to them being friends with one was just as bad as being one. Gerard said nothing. Frank spoke up saying something about how they were friends but to leave Gerard alone. The bullies still focused on Gerard told him if that was so then theywould make his life a living hell just as they were planning on doing to Franks. Just as one of thebullies was cockingback his fist to give Gerard the first blow there was a whispered "No". The one about to strike put his fist down and asked Gerard what he said. "No im not his friend" he said. "Gerard you dont have to lie, they're just messing with you. They are not even supposed to be near me after what happened last friday. They can get expelled for this" Frank said. "Is that so?" Said one of the bullies " I think you should know that the principal is good friends with most of our parents so the possibilty of that happening is non-existent." Turning back to Gerard the bully tells him to either admit that he and Frank are friends OR walk away leaving Frank to recieve another mass beating therefore proving they're not actually friends. Gerard moves around the bully to go stand in front of a now smiling Frank. "WIPE THAT SMILE OFF YOUR FUCKING FACE YOU FAG!!! STOP TELLING PEOPLE THAT WE ARE FUCKIN FRIENDS! I WAS NEVER REALLY YOUR FUCKING FRIEND AND I NEVER WILL BE!! SO GET THATTHROUGH YOUR PERVERTED MIND YOU SICKO AND STOP FUCKING CRYING YOU PUSSY!!!!" Gerard watched as tears cascaded down his ex-bestfriends face, witheyes full of sadness and betrayal. With that he turned and walked away from the scene. He listened to the sound of skin hitting skin and sobbing. He felt tears slip from his eyes at the shame and hate he felt for himself at what hehad just done to Frank. Therewas no turning back now though.
When they were 12 two major things happened. Frank came out of the closet and Gerard developed feelings for Frank.
It was a Friday that he decided to tell Frank how he really felt about him. That morning he marched into school with a steely determination. He was about to tell his best friend how he really felt about him. He saw a crowd of kids around his and Franks locker. Some were just watching but most were yelling FAG! and QUEER! As he neared the crowd what he saw broke him. There was Frank in the middle of the crowd getting kicked and punched mercilessly by guys and girls. His lip was split, he had two black eyes, and he already had cuts and bruises all over his body. This went for five more minutes until some teachers came running down the hall yelling for the crowd to separate and for the assaulters to stop. All the meanwhile Gerard just stood there and watched. He watched for those five minutes while Frank was being beaten. He watched as some faculty picked Frank up and took him to the nurses office. He watched while some of the crowd laughed and joked and said "that the fag got what he deserved!". He spent the rest of the day feeling numb. Had he really just sat there watching his crush/ best friend get beat up? Why? He asked himself. He was afraid and a coward hefinally determined. He knew what he felt for Frank wasn't wrong but the fear was greater. He decided that no matter what he had to stop everything with Frank. He was already an outcast and bullied the last thing he needed was for people to know he had feelings for Frank. He also knew though that if he stayed friends with Frank he would also be targeted just for associating with the "QUEER". * Time Lapse next Friday* All week Frank had been trying to get Gerards attention. Gerard kept true to his word and cut off Frank. Everytime he would get near him he would walk the opposite direction. If Frank was calling his name he would turn his headphones up a little louder and walk faster. Finally after a week of trying Frank cornered Gerard at the front of the school after the final bell rang. He started talking loudly about how he had been trying to get to him all week. The school bullies heard this while exiting the school and took this chance to mess with them. They circled the two boys. They started teasing Frank saying that "Not even your fag boyfriend loves you queer cause your such a worthless piece of shit!" Answering at the same time they both denied being each others boyfriend. Of course no one believed them even thoughFrank insisted that they were just friends. Deciding to have a little fun the bullies turned to Gerard. They asked him if it was true was he really friends with the fag? Cause they said to them being friends with one was just as bad as being one. Gerard said nothing. Frank spoke up saying something about how they were friends but to leave Gerard alone. The bullies still focused on Gerard told him if that was so then theywould make his life a living hell just as they were planning on doing to Franks. Just as one of thebullies was cockingback his fist to give Gerard the first blow there was a whispered "No". The one about to strike put his fist down and asked Gerard what he said. "No im not his friend" he said. "Gerard you dont have to lie, they're just messing with you. They are not even supposed to be near me after what happened last friday. They can get expelled for this" Frank said. "Is that so?" Said one of the bullies " I think you should know that the principal is good friends with most of our parents so the possibilty of that happening is non-existent." Turning back to Gerard the bully tells him to either admit that he and Frank are friends OR walk away leaving Frank to recieve another mass beating therefore proving they're not actually friends. Gerard moves around the bully to go stand in front of a now smiling Frank. "WIPE THAT SMILE OFF YOUR FUCKING FACE YOU FAG!!! STOP TELLING PEOPLE THAT WE ARE FUCKIN FRIENDS! I WAS NEVER REALLY YOUR FUCKING FRIEND AND I NEVER WILL BE!! SO GET THATTHROUGH YOUR PERVERTED MIND YOU SICKO AND STOP FUCKING CRYING YOU PUSSY!!!!" Gerard watched as tears cascaded down his ex-bestfriends face, witheyes full of sadness and betrayal. With that he turned and walked away from the scene. He listened to the sound of skin hitting skin and sobbing. He felt tears slip from his eyes at the shame and hate he felt for himself at what hehad just done to Frank. Therewas no turning back now though.
@KayKay
Soon but not soon enough.
Thanx for reading and commenting!
2/9/15