Bert and Gerard sat at the fifth bar that evening, they were spinning around on the chairs.
‘Ohhh WAITER?!’ slurred Gerard, in the most high pitched voice he could manage. ‘TWO- wait no,’ he held out his fingers and tried to count. ‘FOUR SHOTS FOR ME AND MY COMPANION HERE!’
‘YES YES YES VODKA!’ screamed Bert. He laughed hysterically.
The waiter did as requested.
Gerard and Bert picked up two each, and guzzled them in a matter of seconds. They left the bartender $20 too much and left.
Together they stumbled down the road arm in arm.
‘ya know what Geerard?’ slurred Bert. ‘This is thee best night I’ve had in a fuckin long time,’
Gerard hiccupped and tried to say he felt the same, but he was finding it hard to string the words together. Then Gerard had an idea.
‘Dooo you know if Dann-‘*hiccup* ‘ee is still dealing round here?’ said Gerard.
Berts face lit up. ‘Hee might b-’ Bert tripped up on his feet and fell over on the sidewalk, pulling Gerard down with him. Both were laughing hysterically. ‘I haven’t got a new phone in years.Sooo I might still have his number!’
Both of them were now sitting on the pavement leaning against the bar they just walked out of. Bert managed to pull out his phone and handed it to Gerard.
His vision was blurred, but he scrolled down the contact list until he came across two Danny’s.
‘Urrg Bert?’
Bert lifted up his head ‘yerp?’
‘There are two Danny’s in ‘ere’
‘It should be the the one wit a D as a slurname,’ Bert breathed heavily and looked up to the stars.
Gerard called the number.
‘Hello?’
‘DANNNYYYY BOY!’

‘Um yes?’
‘IT’S GERARD! From back in the day! Do you Remememember meee?’ Gerard laughed as if he told the funniest joke.
‘Oh god, hey, it’s been a while! You in California?’
‘Yeehaa,’ was his reply
‘You want your old usual fix?’
Bert chimed in. ‘DONT YOU FORGET ABOUT ME,’ he sang the words.
‘I’ll make that a double,’ Danny laughed. ‘Whereabouts are you, I’ll meet you.’
‘Err Bert Where for art thou we?’
‘The floor,’ was Bert reply.
Gerard laughed as he started to look around. ‘Ah we are at the Californication bar,’
‘Perfect I live 2 minutes from there. I’ll meet you guys in the alleyway right next to it; it’s where they put all their trash. See you in 5,’ Danny hung up the phone.
‘Hey Butthead,’ Gerard said in the best Beavis voice he could. ‘We’re gonna score,’
They didn’t stop laughing until Danny found them.
It was only about midnight, but there wasn’t really anyone around.
Danny dragged the pair off the sidewalk and led them to the alley. Bert wrapped his arms around Danny’s neck and whispered in his ear; ‘I love you man.’
Danny laughed. I see you two have been having a good night,’ he handed them two sachets of white powder. And too little straws. ‘Oh and this shits got something a little extra in it, enjoy!’
Gerard pulled out what was left of his cash, which was about $250. Danny took it happily.
‘Good doing business,’ he said as he walked off.
Bert and Gerard stumbled out of the alley and into the bar. They both waved to the bartender as they waltzed into the bathroom.
Each sachet had about four lines worth in it.
When they finished snorting, they collapsed on the bathroom floor and took in the high. It felt even better than how they remembered.
Gerard felt the hole of depression which he got from the accident, fill up. In this moment, he felt so happy he could die.
The next hour or so was a complete blur. They took more shots until the bar closed, and then stumbled around the empty streets of California. It was raining hard now. They practically fell in a small twenty-four hour shop. And Bert bought a bottle of vodka.
They carried on down the empty streets screaming and shouting a variety of songs.
They collapsed on top of each other on the cold, wet, pavement. In the space of a minute both their eyes had rolled back, and they were passed out.